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Thread: Declassified

  1. #1
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    Default Declassified

    "It was horrible. He wished he had never known about it. He had thought that it would be a great blessing, but it was just awful. All he had to do was think about something, and it was declassified. He sat at Mar-a-Lago with a thick Turkish towel wrapped around his head, eyes squeezed shut, willing the thoughts to stop.


    He remembered years ago when he had been a little boy and somebody had told him that the best way to get somebody to think about elephants was to tell them, “Don’t think about elephants.” He had tried not to, to see if it was right, and an elephant sprang unbidden into his mind and sat there, and he could not get it out. For almost a week, all he had done was think about elephants.

    Simply by trying not to think about them, he had summoned a whole herd; his mind would try to rush past them to rhinos or skip away from them toward mice, but it only made him more aware of the elephant he was avoiding. As long as you knew what you were trying not to think about it, it was hopeless. The elephant always won in the end.

    Now he got up and turned on the TV. Usually having the TV on very loud helped him not think. He had made it through large chunks of his life not thinking very hard. Indeed, sometimes he had gone years without having anything that rose to the level of a thought — some gut feelings, numerous prejudices, but nothing that could be considered actively thinking. But now all he was doing was thinking. He hated it. It was an awful process, very unpleasant to do, and he could see why it had made his uncle at MIT so unhappy and caused him to look so upset all the time.

    What a mistake it had been, to try to declassify things that way. He had thought it would be a good power for the president to have. Much more convenient than the old process, which involved a lot of paperwork and talking. This way, no sooner would he think a thing than it would no longer be a secret. Everyone could know about it, and you could take it out of a Sensitive Compartmented Information Facility and walk around with it and let it see Florida sunshine for a first time, then a Florida storage room and some copies of Time magazine, also in Florida.

    And it had seemed fine, for a time. He was proud of his new power. He brought friends to Mar-a-Lago and showed them how he could declassify documents with a single thought. Whole boxes of documents were suddenly fine for anyone to look at and carry anywhere! All the savory characters he gathered around himself were very impressed.

    “But Donald,” one of them said, very hesitantly, “suppose you don’t want to declassify something, but you have to think about it?”

    This thought had not occurred to him, although when it did, it was instantly declassified.

    “And suppose you want to make sure something stays classified?” somebody else asked. “Could you even think about it then?”

    “Or what if you think about something, but it’s a thing that proves that what you are saying is untrue?”

    He tried not to think about the answer to that question. But the more he tried not to think about it, the worse it got. He excused himself from dinner early and went upstairs, protesting that if he were a weaker kind of man, he would have a headache, but that he wasn’t, so he didn’t.

    Now he sat there with his eyes squeezed shut. No, that was worse. Turn on the television! Turn it on! Turn on Fox News! They were talking about the FBI, the documents — no, he was thinking about them now! His lawyer had said it was important that the documents remain in a kind of limbo where he was both thinking about them and not thinking about them for their legal strategy to work.

    He was not going to think about the documents! He was not going to think about any state secrets! He was certainly not going to think about the nuclear codes, or anything to do with France, or — no, it was just getting worse! He thought about his family, but that just made him think about their business dealings, and — no, better not. Why, there were things that could damage him, if they were not kept absolutely secret! If people were to find out about them — MIND BLANK! THOUGHTS EMPTY!

    He tried and tried. But for once in his life, the thoughts would not stop. He could feel it happening. Everywhere around him huge boxes of papers were getting declassified. State secrets were flying around everywhere!

    He began to scream. Soon there would be no more secrets! If he could only forget! But he could not forget. For the first time in his life, he was thinking about everything. The elephant was winning."

    https://wapo.st/3S8eGMj

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Declassified

    Oh, that's good.
    "For a successful technology, reality must take precedence over public relations,
    for nature cannot be fooled."

    Richard Feynman

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Declassified

    Awesome pestilential - er...presidential - powers.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Declassified

    That is too good not to share with a larger audience. Do you know a web site that will publish it? That was great!
    "Where you live in the world should not determine whether you live in the world." - Bono

    "Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip." - Will Rogers

    "Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others." - Groucho Marx

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Declassified

    Quote Originally Posted by CWSmith View Post
    That is too good not to share with a larger audience. Do you know a web site that will publish it? That was great!
    It came from the Washington Post. Link (paywall).
    Last edited by Keith Wilson; 09-22-2022 at 02:42 PM.
    "For a successful technology, reality must take precedence over public relations,
    for nature cannot be fooled."

    Richard Feynman

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Declassified

    Quote Originally Posted by Keith Wilson View Post
    It came form the Washington Post. Link (paywall).
    Shoot! Too bad. Well, good, but I thought we had a writer in our midst.
    "Where you live in the world should not determine whether you live in the world." - Bono

    "Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip." - Will Rogers

    "Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others." - Groucho Marx

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Declassified

    Well, I can't remember anyone ever considering Mr. Trump "classy."

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Declassified

    If you change your mind, can you undo de-classification, just by thinking about it?

    Letting someone know would seem to be simple good manners, apart from good national security management.
    If Russia wins, there will be no Ukraine; if Ukraine wins, there will be a new Russia.

    -- Dmytro Kuleba, Foreign Minister of Ukraine

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Declassified

    This whole episode is the perfect example of the snake oil salesman that tRump is.
    Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication. Leonardo da Vinci.

    If war is the answer........... it must be a profoundly stupid question.

    "Freighters on the nod on the surface of the bay, One of these days we're going to sail away"
    Bruce Cockburn

  10. #10
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    Default

    That was great. Thanks!!


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    Tom

  11. #11
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    Default Re: Declassified

    I can see a skit now parodying the old Johnny Carson skit about being able to mind-read documents.
    Gerard>
    Albuquerque, NM

    Next election, vote against EVERY Republican, for EVERY office, at EVERY level. Be patriotic, save the country.

  12. #12
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    Default Re: Declassified

    Quote Originally Posted by Keith Wilson View Post
    It came from the Washington Post. Link (paywall).

    Just my opinion: The Post & The NY Times are worth a few bucks a month to me. I have my limits as to what I will pay for, but every month i feel i get my monies worth with those two.
    Skip

    ---This post is delivered with righteous passion and with a solemn southern directness --
    ...........fighting against the deliberate polarization of politics...

  13. #13
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    Default Re: Declassified

    .
    Umm... if Trump declassifies with his thoughts a document concerning a human intelligence source within an unfriendly foreign government, do yah think the CIA would want to know? Does Trump inform the CIA telepathically or does he simply believe no one outside of his own mind needs to know?

    Actually, Trump's Jedi mind power explains why his followers are so in thrall to his BS.... his Force can have a strong influence on the weak minded.

    "I'll tell you why [religion's] not a scam. In my opinion, all right? Tide goes in, tide goes out. Never a miscommunication. You can't explain that."Bill O'Reilly

  14. #14
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    Default Re: Declassified

    It’s worth noting that in trumps interview with Hannity that he said he could send the declassified documents to Mar A Largo or wherever. Does this imply that as well as having the documents stored at Mar A Largo some were sent wherever? Is this evidence of trumps megalomania and delusion that as POTUS he was all powerful he could do what he wants that he could send the documents to whoever he chose whenever he chosen? Is this further evidence of trumps utter ignorance, and of a stunted mind of an adolescent in the body of a man who by manipulation became the president of United States. If Trump is genuinely delusional and ignorant in this fashion than one can expect classified material to have been sent to those who had a channel to Trump.
    Last edited by Hallam; 09-22-2022 at 07:40 PM.
    Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication. Leonardo da Vinci.

    If war is the answer........... it must be a profoundly stupid question.

    "Freighters on the nod on the surface of the bay, One of these days we're going to sail away"
    Bruce Cockburn

  15. #15
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    Default Re: Declassified

    Quote Originally Posted by Canoeyawl View Post
    Link incorrect.

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/opini...y-mind-satire/

    Alexandra Petri is a cartoonist with talents for both drawing and words. She's worth every penny of the $100/year I pay for access to the WaPo. Compared to the $17/month I pay the NYT, the WaPo is cheap.

    A hundred bucks a year isn't going to break your bank.
    A society predicated on the assumption that everyone in it should want to get rich is not well situated to become either ethical or imaginative.

    Photographer of sailing and sailboats
    And other things, too.
    http://www.landsedgephoto.com

  16. #16
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    Default Re: Declassified

    Quote Originally Posted by elf View Post
    Link incorrect.

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/opini...y-mind-satire/

    Alexandra Petri is a cartoonist with talents for both drawing and words. She's worth every penny of the $100/year I pay for access to the WaPo. Compared to the $17/month I pay the NYT, the WaPo is cheap.

    A hundred bucks a year isn't going to break your bank.
    That is a "shared" link, works fine here

  17. #17
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    Default Re: Declassified

    Rump has revealed his taxes...by just thinking about it.

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