If you're really bad in life, you go to...

[David G]

[Canoez]

Is Paul hearing accordion music?

[TomF]

[Gerarddm]

"Mama's got a squeeze box, Daddy never sleeps at night". - The Who. :-)

[Paul Pless]

Is Paul hearing accordion music?

no accordian music yet. . .

Here's a favourite Lamentation though.

[John Bell]

Accordian, banjo, bagpipes, what's the diff?

[Uncle Duke]

From multiple sources:

Perfect pitch is when you throw the banjo into the dumpster and it lands right on the accordion

[MiddleAgesMan]

...hell? Not if you work in the travel industry.

(borrowed from a friend in the business who put this up this morning)

Last night as I lay sleeping
I died or so it seemed,
Then I went to heaven
But only in my dream

Up there St Peter met me
Standing at the pearly gates,
He said "I must check your record
Please stand here and wait."

He turned and said "Your record
Is covered with terrible flaws,
On earth I see you rallied
For every losing cause."

I see that you drank alcohol
And smoked and partied too,
Fact is, you've done everything
A good person should never do.

We can't have people like you up here
Your life was full of sin,
Then he read the last of my record
Took my hand and said "Come in."

He led me up to the big boss and said
"Take her in and treat her well",
She used to work in Travel
She's done her time in hell

[Canoez]

no accordian music yet. . .

Here's a favourite Lamentation though.

Gawd. What I wouldn't give for an iced coffee...

[Mrleft8]

Huh....... And I thought that the correct ending was "You go to Congress".....

[Flying Orca]

"Mama's got a squeeze box, Daddy never sleeps at night". - The Who. :-)

We used to do that one... but then we had a pretty hot accordion player:

[Waddie]

I have always thought polka music and Mexican music sounded a lot alike.

regards,
Waddie

[seanz]

I have always thought polka music and Mexican music sounded a lot alike.

regards,
Waddie

People have also detected similarities between cheap vodka and cheap tequila.........

[Tom Montgomery]

A banjo player died and, to his surprise and consternation, arrived in Hell.

Satan greeted him and said, "You will share quarters with another musician... A concert violinist."

Two weeks went by and the banjo player had a great time. The climate was mild, the food was good, and he could play his banjo to his heart's content.

Then one day the banjo player ran into Satan. "I don't get it," he said, "This doesn't seem like punishment and torment."

Satan replied, "Who said you are the one being punished and tormented?"

[bobbys]

[B_B]

no accordian music yet. . .

Here's a favourite Lamentation though.

My absolutely favourite cup of coffee in the morning is drinking the last bit from the day before.

[skuthorp]

OTOH, a local banjo player, being diagnosed with a terminal illness , for the second time actually, paid for two wakes. The first whilst he was still around to enjoy it, the second in his own home where he was supposedly lying for a viewing. In fact the coffin became the bar according to his instructions. It sounds macabre but all his jazz muso friends understood.

[john welsford]

You know of course that its futile to practice playing the banjo? As your dear old mother always told you " If you keep pickin at it, it will never get any better"

John Welsford

A banjo player died and, to his surprise and consternation, arrived in Hell.

Satan greeted him and said, "You will share quarters with another musician... A concert violinist."

Two weeks went by and the banjo player had a great time. The climate was mild, the food was good, and he could play his banjo to his heart's content.

Then one day the banjo player ran into Satan. "I don't get it," he said, "This doesn't seem like punishment and torment."

Satan replied, "Who said you are the one being punished and tormented?"

[Flying Orca]

Did you know that there are only two schools of accordion repair in the world? Hohner runs one in Germany, and a woman I like to call "Our Lady of the Accordions" runs the other, which is in Duluth. That's also what I like to call the former church that houses the school and collection of everything squeezeboxy.

Oystagirl studied there for a year. It's an interesting place; Dave Barry wrote a column about it, which you can probably find with a bit of googling. I wonder if it's still there...

[skuthorp]

I've been asked to repair the bellows on a few in the past, I guess they thought a bookbinder might have the skills. Seemed to have held up OK

[skuthorp]

Florida?