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Thread: Whole roast long pig.....

  1. #1
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    Default Whole roast long pig.....

    Someone asked for a recipe....

    * One cleanly slain Human, approx. 90-100lbs dressed weight (heavier bodies may require additional time)
    * Hickory wood (apple wood or a combination may also work quite well)
    * 3 qt Water
    * 3/4 c Salt
    * 2 ts Red pepper
    * 2 ts Black pepper
    * 1 1/2 c Vinegar
    * Barbecue Sauce

    Directions:

    First, if it has not already been dressed, prepare the carcass: Suspend the body by either pairing and tying limbs with rope or twine and attaching these to a horizontal beam, or by inserting meathooks into each ankle via a cut behind the Achilles Tendon.
    Completely bleed carcass by making a deep incision across the neck from one ear to the other. Be sure to raise the rest of the body above the point of incision so that gravity is allowed to pull out all the blood; this may be aided by repeated compression of the abdomen. Approximately six liters of blood should be removed through this method; discard carefully.
    Remove head by continuing already started incision around the entire neck and twisting and/or slicing to separate the head from the spinal cord.
    Gut corpse by cutting from the solar plexus to a point near the anus, carefully avoiding the intestines. Cut around the anus and tie it off with twine. Using a saw, cut through the pubic bone. It should now be possible to remove the anus and all abdominal organs by pulling and cutting as necessary. Take care not to cut into organs of the digestive system, as they may contaminate the flesh (clean thoroughly if this happens). Cut through the diaphragm to reveal and remove chest organs and any remaining blood vessels.
    Remove feet and lower portion of arms by cleanly cutting around and separating the ankle and elbow joints. Removing all hair at this point is suggested. (enth notes that pork factories do this with flash heating; if a little surface charring is tolerable (roasting it in the pit will char it anyway), try taking a propane torch to the skin, or employ some similar method of burning off the surface hair.) Saw backbone in order to lay body spread eagle while roasting.

    Prepare fire pit by digging a hole in solid ground approximately 1 to 1.5 feet deep, 3.5 feet wide and 6 feet long, tapering out at either end. Fill the pit with hickory twigs and burn until dry. Form, light, and maintain a second fire near the pit for use as a source of coals during the cooking process.

    Combine water, salt, pepper, and vinegar to form a brine. Suspend body, spread-eagle and meat side down, over pit using iron rods, bed springs, or a heavy hog wire mesh. Roast very slowly over a period of 10-16 hours, or until the internal temperature of the meat reaches 170 degrees Farenheit. Once cooking has begun, cover with metal roofing sheet or other heat-tolerant material in order to retain heat and distribute smoke. While roasting, occasionally baste meat with the brine and add coals as needed. Coals should be limited so that grease does not drip and ignite; these flames should be smothered with a shovel to prevent charing or burning. During the last 5-8 hours, turn the body over, skin side down, and collect fat that may accumulate around the ribs and shoulders. This can be solidified and stored as lard for later use.

    Once the meat has reached 170 degrees, remove from pit (or remove coals) and smother with barbecue sauce. Proceed to chop off pieces of meat (1/2 to 1 pound per serving) and enjoy! There should be enough meat to feed a small to moderately sized group of people; approximately 12-24 servings.
    Wakan Tanka Kici Un
    ..a bad day sailing is a heckuva lot better than the best day at work.....
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    Live your life so that whenever you lose, you're ahead."
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  2. #2
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by paladin View Post

    Once the meat has reached 170 degrees,
    Why are you trying to kill the pig twice?

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Right now I'm twitching at the thought of my hair being burnt off with a blow torch.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    That's not the way they did it at Donner pass...
    The doctrine of nonresistance against arbitrary power, and oppression, is absurd, slavish, and destructive of the good and happiness of mankind.
    Personal failures are too important to be trusted to others.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Or after the wreck of the Medusa. But pretty similar to the praactice in the South Sea Islands pre missionaries. Pity they stopped then really.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    About 20 years ago I was a guest in a village where they had recently had a celebratory dinner. They made efforts to "clean up" the place, and I was politely asked if I was offended. I honestly said "no" and all was well.....I didn't stay the night.
    Wakan Tanka Kici Un
    ..a bad day sailing is a heckuva lot better than the best day at work.....
    Fighting Illegal immigration since 1492....
    Live your life so that whenever you lose, you're ahead."
    "If you live life right, death is a joke as far as fear is concerned."

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    I had a friend that was in the Czech army, He was a national hero and was a General and had there Medal of Honor.

    Fighting the Germans he was shot many times and Bayoneted.

    He fought for the Russians but after the war was sent to Siberia to a gulag..

    I had heard his son tell me but i just had to ask him about eating dead bodies to survive.

    He said well they were starving to death and dug up bodies in the snow and cut them up and ate them..

    I did not want to ask him anymore.

    He passed away while on a trip back there, He was looking up my Families names there for me..

    When i asked him about my Great grandparents Village in Slovakia he knew it and fought there in WW2.

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    The last recorded cannibal feast in NZ was held only 30 miles or so from where I live.
    It is kinda spooky driving through there at night, I start hearing odd engine noises.
    There is nothing quite as permanent as a good temporary repair.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    The Australian troops on the Kokoda Track in WW2 discovered a number of their fallen comrades who had been literally butchered by the starving Japanese troops... buttocks removed, etc. Not many prisoners were taken after that.

    I was told, when visiting the PNG Highlands about 18 years ago, that I would be walking past people in the main street who had eaten human flesh... some of the men in the street were wearing nothing but "arse grass"... long, broad leaves tied around their waist. Rockefeller had been cooked and eaten in PNG only 30 years prior.
    Carpe the living sh!t out of the Diem

    I'd rather look back at my life and say "I can't believe I did that" instead of being there saying "I wish I'd done that"

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    ^ quite a "bit" of histories at the AWM and subsequent trials mention these "incidents".

    As for Rockefeller, weeel the jury is still out due to media bull**** beatups and how you have "inside info" is perplexing. (unless you have an inside line to Rupert's op-ed desk)

    BTW in tradtl societies the ritual mouthing of meat is a recognition of the valour of one's opponent, NOT the nutrient value.

  11. #11
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by purri View Post
    ^ quite a "bit" of histories at the AWM and subsequent trials mention these "incidents".

    As for Rockefeller, weeel the jury is still out due to media bull**** beatups and how you have "inside info" is perplexing. (unless you have an inside line to Rupert's op-ed desk)

    BTW in tradtl societies the ritual mouthing of meat is a recognition of the valour of one's opponent, NOT the nutrient value.
    There's a number of reports of human meat in dilly bags in the early years of European settlement here... and the general reporting was that it was due to nutrition rather than anything else.
    Carpe the living sh!t out of the Diem

    I'd rather look back at my life and say "I can't believe I did that" instead of being there saying "I wish I'd done that"

  12. #12
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Carpe the living sh!t out of the Diem

    I'd rather look back at my life and say "I can't believe I did that" instead of being there saying "I wish I'd done that"

  13. #13
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    ... and if you believe Frank Monte, the Rockefeller issue was settled... confirmed by two independent sources and the skull was retrieved.

    http://www.tikiroom.com/tikicentral/...c=8874&forum=6
    Carpe the living sh!t out of the Diem

    I'd rather look back at my life and say "I can't believe I did that" instead of being there saying "I wish I'd done that"

  14. #14
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by paladin View Post
    Approximately six liters of blood should be removed through this method; discard carefully.
    What, you don't like morcilla?

  15. #15
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Frank Monte,

    FFS!!

    A reference to "historical records" is a BS term for "demonising the other" and this is what in part the "Hospital Creek" (NSW) and other shootups were about.

    You know SFA!

    I would qualify it as "historico-fabulist".

  16. #16
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Swmbo says that there is good edible muscle attached to the jaw bone....
    Complicated problems usually have simple solutions - which are almost always wrong.

  17. #17
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Think I'll wait til I see Andrew Zimmern try it before I dig in, thanks.
    Fast enough to get there,
    But slow enough to see.
    Not known for predictability!

  18. #18
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Stiletto View Post
    The last recorded cannibal feast in NZ was held only 30 miles or so from where I live.
    It is kinda spooky driving through there at night, I start hearing odd engine noises.
    The last one you know about.....
    Never trust a man with a clean workshop.

  19. #19
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    There were extremely few other sources of animal protein in the Upper New Guinea Highlands. No deer, no tapir, no monkeys, no pigs, no antelopes. . . . .
    Last edited by James McMullen; 03-12-2010 at 08:30 AM.
    If this post did not meet all of your needs, please consult this thread for more options.

  20. #20
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by James McMullen View Post
    There were extremely few other sources of animal protein in the Upper New Guinea Highlands. No deer, no tapir, no monkeys, no pigs, no antelopes. . . . .
    well that disproves the cannibalism...they are vegans
    The doctrine of nonresistance against arbitrary power, and oppression, is absurd, slavish, and destructive of the good and happiness of mankind.
    Personal failures are too important to be trusted to others.

  21. #21
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    How did this go from pig roast to cannibals..........
    did I really say that out loud.........

  22. #22
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by jack grebe View Post
    How did this go from pig roast to cannibals..........
    Ummm...Er..Google 'Long Pig' and see what pops up.

  23. #23
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by oznabrag View Post
    Ummm...Er..Google 'Long Pig' and see what pops up.

    Ummm sometimes google isn't your friend

    http://www.churchofeuthanasia.org/e-...s/butcher.html

  24. #24
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    darn....Jack...didja miss that part of history class.....?
    Wakan Tanka Kici Un
    ..a bad day sailing is a heckuva lot better than the best day at work.....
    Fighting Illegal immigration since 1492....
    Live your life so that whenever you lose, you're ahead."
    "If you live life right, death is a joke as far as fear is concerned."

  25. #25
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by paladin View Post
    About 20 years ago I was a guest in a village where they had recently had a celebratory dinner. They made efforts to "clean up" the place, and I was politely asked if I was offended. I honestly said "no" and all was well.....I didn't stay the night.
    Working on a race horse breeding farm in Florida late 1960's. I woke up one morning to the sound of the wranglers shooting the herd of hogs- that were living in a fenced off phosphate pit 100 yards from my cabin- with a 30-30. I managed to get out there in time for the dipping in boiling water and scraping phase. It took a crew of men all day to cut those huge hogs down to a little mountain of packages of all kinds of cuts, sausages etc. They did not waste anything! It looked like a mass murder, blood everywhere. But I rolled up my sleeves and pitched in to help. They gave each of us who worked on the farm a big box of meat. The bacon and ham came a week later, smoked to perfection. I never had pork so good as all of that since.
    Fly Fishing Washington's Olympic Peninsula
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  26. #26
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Uhhhhhhh, Bob....long pig ain't pork.........
    Long Pig
    slang term for human flesh prepared as the flesh of a pig. Usually used to sell human flesh to tourists in East Asian countries. Long Pig is best when avoided entirely.
    long pig is people!!!
    Wakan Tanka Kici Un
    ..a bad day sailing is a heckuva lot better than the best day at work.....
    Fighting Illegal immigration since 1492....
    Live your life so that whenever you lose, you're ahead."
    "If you live life right, death is a joke as far as fear is concerned."

  27. #27
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Uh...yeah... Yah old curmudgeon! I was just sharing...

    It was so traumatic .....
    Fly Fishing Washington's Olympic Peninsula
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  28. #28
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by purri View Post
    Frank Monte,

    FFS!!

    A reference to "historical records" is a BS term for "demonising the other" and this is what in part the "Hospital Creek" (NSW) and other shootups were about.

    You know SFA!

    I would qualify it as "historico-fabulist".
    Yeah, I remember, if one of my relatives told me something, to you its hearsay. If anyone you know tells YOU something, its gospel.
    Carpe the living sh!t out of the Diem

    I'd rather look back at my life and say "I can't believe I did that" instead of being there saying "I wish I'd done that"

  29. #29
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    I think Jack musta passed out...
    The doctrine of nonresistance against arbitrary power, and oppression, is absurd, slavish, and destructive of the good and happiness of mankind.
    Personal failures are too important to be trusted to others.

  30. #30
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Hey purri... interesting article on Hospital Creek here.

    http://news.google.com/newspapers?ni...g=6875,3528005
    Carpe the living sh!t out of the Diem

    I'd rather look back at my life and say "I can't believe I did that" instead of being there saying "I wish I'd done that"

  31. #31
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by The Bigfella View Post
    Hey purri... interesting article on Hospital Creek here.

    http://news.google.com/newspapers?ni...g=6875,3528005
    see my comments in OZ politics. BTW I'm related to the Colless and Skuthorpe clans that way. Got there abt 1848 (Come by Chance and Moculta stations etc). Have 'lations both sides of the fence those parts.

    The creek itself and site is on a tree line abt 3km in near Bokhara Plains on the back road to Hebel. Community talks abt 30-40 people done in. Probably abt 20 plus wounded and the events surrounding were more complex and nuanced than what the scribe states.

    Property is city folk owned. The current? manager (as of 08) is a real redneck and has threatened people (incl govt agencies) with violence on requests to enter and inspect/ document.
    Last edited by purri; 03-12-2010 at 08:08 PM. Reason: add text

  32. #32
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by paladin View Post
    Uhhhhhhh, Bob....long pig ain't pork.........
    Long Pig
    slang term for human flesh prepared as the flesh of a pig. Usually used to sell human flesh to tourists in East Asian countries. Long Pig is best when avoided entirely.
    long pig is people!!!

    Did you have any idea that your recipe would precipitate this?

  33. #33
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Of course he did.
    Carpe the living sh!t out of the Diem

    I'd rather look back at my life and say "I can't believe I did that" instead of being there saying "I wish I'd done that"

  34. #34
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Michael D. Storey View Post
    Did you have any idea that your recipe would precipitate this?
    You had to ask?

  35. #35
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    BTW in tradtl societies the ritual mouthing of meat is a recognition of the valour of one's opponent, NOT the nutrient value.
    True but in PNG where there was a general shortage of protein, the later was the case.
    At the age of 62 I have come to realise that you can't breed out stupidity.

  36. #36
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    If'n ya think PNG is wild...take a shallow draft boat ride up the Amazon.......
    Wakan Tanka Kici Un
    ..a bad day sailing is a heckuva lot better than the best day at work.....
    Fighting Illegal immigration since 1492....
    Live your life so that whenever you lose, you're ahead."
    "If you live life right, death is a joke as far as fear is concerned."

  37. #37
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    One time in Nicaragua during the Sandinista revolution we went to a 'restaurant' and my friend ordered the 'steak'. Not quite sure what they served her but it definitely wasn't cow. Needless to say, she sent it back to the kitchen and went for the chicken instead. Not a hundred percent sure it was chicken, either. But at least is was some kind of bird.

  38. #38
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    I ain't agonna say it....but maybe.......unless there was wings on it maybe t'weren't a bird....
    Wakan Tanka Kici Un
    ..a bad day sailing is a heckuva lot better than the best day at work.....
    Fighting Illegal immigration since 1492....
    Live your life so that whenever you lose, you're ahead."
    "If you live life right, death is a joke as far as fear is concerned."

  39. #39
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    Quote Originally Posted by paladin View Post
    I ain't agonna say it....but maybe.......unless there was wings on it maybe t'weren't a bird....
    That was just too unsettling a possiblity to consider. Although we did see some rather plump rodents in Managua. And scrawny cats, and...

  40. #40
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    Default Re: Whole roast long pig.....

    I would suspect cat, but then again the rats were bigger than rabbits.

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