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View Full Version : You might be a bachelor boat builder if...



switters
05-08-2009, 12:28 PM
you have vacuumed out the inside of the bare wooden hull in the garage twice in the last week, and living room floor once in the last month.

This came to me last night and thought I might share some humor, it is getting serious down here again.

another one,

You have asked out a woman who claims to be an artist just so you can talk her into painting the lettering on the transom.

Captain Blight
05-08-2009, 01:05 PM
... If you have degreased engine parts in the kitchen sink, and used the coffee table as an assembly bench.

Capt Nat
05-08-2009, 01:14 PM
..."Bachelor Boat Builder"... ...oh, what a life it would be!

boylesboats
05-08-2009, 01:15 PM
Oh gosh switters :D.. You do have some serious brain storm

hokiefan
05-08-2009, 01:35 PM
Well, I'm a part time bachelor boat builder. Right now in my tiny work-week apartment there's a new double blade paddle hanging from the ceiling with the 3rd coat of polyurethane drying. The brush is hanging from over the sink from the cabinet handle. And the progressive jars of mineral spirits for cleaning it are in the pantry on the 2nd shelf. I can clean the whole place with a broom in 5 minutes! And I occasionally do it!!!

Cheers,

Bobby

switters
05-08-2009, 01:47 PM
from my college days back in Durango,

You only have one wall decoration in your living room, it's a sail. And that spends 5 months on top of the car.

Captain Blight
05-08-2009, 01:53 PM
...If using your kitchen equipment when necessary seems like a sound, money-saving idea.

Tylerdurden
05-08-2009, 02:46 PM
Sometimes I wish I had someone to assist in these boat building projects. Monday I painted the new dingy but soon after fell ill.
The flu hit me like never before as I have been down since then with it.
What sucks is I never had chance to cover the boat and the paint is a mess. I just got out to see it this morning.

Now I am behind the eight ball having gotten nothing done and my deadline to move is fast approaching. I guess I going to name it ****ty dingy and leave it as is until I build the one I wanted to.:o

Canoez
05-08-2009, 02:51 PM
Sometimes I wish I had someone to assist in these boat building projects. Monday I painted the new dingy but soon after fell ill.
The flu hit me like never before as I have been down since then with it.
What sucks is I never had chance to cover the boat and the paint is a mess. I just got out to see it this morning.

Now I am behind the eight ball having gotten nothing done and my deadline to move is fast approaching. I guess I going to name it ****ty dingy and leave it as is until I build the one I wanted to.:o

How about Marla's Outhouse? (I've got a few others, but I think they'd be "Scottable" :eek:)

switters
05-08-2009, 02:57 PM
Sometimes I wish I had someone to assist in these boat building projects. Monday I painted the new dingy but soon after fell ill.
The flu hit me like never before as I have been down since then with it.
What sucks is I never had chance to cover the boat and the paint is a mess. I just got out to see it this morning.

Now I am behind the eight ball having gotten nothing done and my deadline to move is fast approaching. I guess I going to name it ****ty dingy and leave it as is until I build the one I wanted to.:o

flu sucks, any kind. what did you end up building?

hokiefan
05-08-2009, 03:08 PM
Sometimes I wish I had someone to assist in these boat building projects. Monday I painted the new dingy but soon after fell ill.
The flu hit me like never before as I have been down since then with it.
What sucks is I never had chance to cover the boat and the paint is a mess. I just got out to see it this morning.

Now I am behind the eight ball having gotten nothing done and my deadline to move is fast approaching. I guess I going to name it ****ty dingy and leave it as is until I build the one I wanted to.:o

Feeling better I hope.

Cheers,

Bobby

Paul Pless
05-08-2009, 03:16 PM
The flu hit me like never before...Sooweeee?

Tylerdurden
05-08-2009, 04:42 PM
flu sucks, any kind. what did you end up building?

D-5 , I didn't have the time or cash to build anything else and no one wanted to trade plans or anything. Of course that was the only real price of my banning.

I am feeling 50% better today but that was the worst flu I had in recent memory. I was going to drive to Normans and cough on him but my good nature got the best of me.:)

stevebaby
05-08-2009, 10:42 PM
Sooweeee?I heard that. It must be time for my dinner.

S B
05-08-2009, 11:26 PM
The woman you are dating thinks the smell of oakum is your aftershave.

cybulski
05-10-2009, 09:43 AM
meet a new girl and the best thing you come up with to say is, uhh you wanna swab my deck?

skuthorp
05-10-2009, 10:07 AM
Once, when the 'leader' of a jazz band I courted a girl for the sole reason that she owned and played the tuba. Not bad either, good muso, Mormon, part Cherokee she said. Didn't last, not musically compatable.

JimD
05-10-2009, 11:45 AM
I rarely vacuum the living room. I find a broom sweeps up the wood shavings well enough.

Captain Intrepid
05-10-2009, 04:26 PM
meet a new girl and the best thing you come up with to say is, uhh you wanna swab my deck?

Extra points if she says yes and you hand her a deckbrush.

stevedwyer
05-10-2009, 04:38 PM
You might (soon) be a bachelor boat builder if...


You use your kitchen stove top to run a two-tea-kettle steam-box.

Joe (SoCal)
05-10-2009, 04:44 PM
Varnished the tiller on my loving room coffee table :)

http://i107.photobucket.com/albums/m320/fosterhere/photo-2064.jpg

Captain Intrepid
05-10-2009, 04:47 PM
You might be a bachelor boat builder if... you get caught doing any of these things? :p

David G
05-10-2009, 05:45 PM
IF: your best pair of boxers has "just a few" epoxy or dolphinite dribbles on 'em.

The Bigfella
05-10-2009, 06:31 PM
Who vacuums the boat? I blow it out with compressed air.

I must be a bachelor... "she" hasn't complained about me setting up the disc sander on the front steps yet. The "garden" is starting to look a bit sawdusted...

switters
05-10-2009, 06:59 PM
Who vacuums the boat? I blow it out with compressed air.

I must be a bachelor... "she" hasn't complained about me setting up the disc sander on the front steps yet. The "garden" is starting to look a bit sawdusted...

Seasoned bachelors don't like to blow the stuff out of the boat all over the garage when they can just vacuum it out. That way they can go an extra month without vacuuming the living room because they aren't tracking so much sawdust in from the garage.

The Bigfella
05-10-2009, 07:08 PM
Nah the boat's out in front of the garage. The garage is being used to house a car that I don't drive.

I noticed that after I ground back some fibreglass and blew the boat out, the neighbourhood had a lovely shiny nature to it.

switters
05-17-2010, 11:48 AM
If you are willing to move into a 1 bedroom apartment surrounded by loud college students so you can still afford the lease on your boat shop and be close enough to ride your bike to and from.

Bike distance is important, because there is a beer fridge next to the moaning chair at Black Flag Boat Works.:p

mmd
05-17-2010, 12:06 PM
... if the decorations in your rental home are the blueprints of the boat you are building.

... if one of the prime requisites of your rental home is that it be in sight of, and within walking distance of, the boatshop.

... if your furniture has several pieces that are cast-offs of ship's equipment, such as flanged pipe spools for stereo speaker stands and cable reels for end tables.

Ask me how I know this...

Canoez
05-17-2010, 12:09 PM
I think it is you WILL be a bachelor boat builder if...

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_MlvfQTkG04Q/R8YI4h4ox0I/AAAAAAAAADY/QmqU2xlMK8U/s400/GLEE.jpg

You strip a boat in the living room because the garage is too darned cold.


Varnished the tiller on my loving room coffee table :) Your Freudian slip is showing...

Paul Pless
05-17-2010, 12:12 PM
... if the decorations in your rental home are the blueprints of the boat you are building.hey... i just got permission from Kat to frame and matte some lines and sail plans for decorating our house:)

mmd
05-17-2010, 12:16 PM
Gee, Doug, the combination of those last two convinces me that I shouldn't consider having BBQ burgers at your house... <wink, grin>

mmd
05-17-2010, 12:25 PM
Paul: Ya mean like this?

http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d19/mmd_ns/TheresaEConnorlinesplan.jpg

Married, schmarried - boats is art, and oughtta be displayed as such!

Paul Pless
05-17-2010, 12:40 PM
Paul: Ya mean like this?Exactly, excepting it'll be prints of American schooners.:D;)

mmd
05-17-2010, 12:44 PM
Normally I'd tease you about your rampant nationalism, but you guys have produced some pretty nice schooners, so I'll let it slide this time... <wink>

SamSam
05-17-2010, 12:52 PM
....you were married when you started to build a boat.

Ian McColgin
05-17-2010, 01:28 PM
. . . if you set up the station molds for epoxying laminated frames in the living room.

Rich Jones
05-17-2010, 01:42 PM
...if you move your bed into the living room and build a boat in the bedroom.

Married life has cured me of that, but I'll be damned if I'm gonna put my boats outside, just so my wife's car can go in the garage. What a crazy concept!

Peter Malcolm Jardine
05-17-2010, 01:45 PM
You converted your spare bedroom to a dust free varnish booth.:D

Canoez
05-17-2010, 01:49 PM
How about varnish in the living room?

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_MlvfQTkG04Q/SRxk6uCln4I/AAAAAAAAAm0/sgdmW1DPElo/s400/boat+in+living+room+sm.jpg

Along with a WARNING! (http://canoez.blogspot.com/2008/11/warning.html)

Lewisboats
05-17-2010, 02:04 PM
...built a boat in the living room...on the carpet!

http://www.angelfire.com/ego/lewisboatworks/Stuff/Designs/Tadpole/FilletOTadPole.JPG

Yeadon
05-17-2010, 03:17 PM
This totally describes me. Last week I moved the couch out of my little tiny living room in order to create a sail loft.

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1363/4607440791_712e73e34e.jpg

I've also done glue-ups on the kitchen counter, as it is the flattest true surface I have. Here's the start of a pizza peel I made for bread baking.

http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4018/4433780088_8031fcc5d6.jpg

And in a previous life, I rebuilt the lower unit to a Honda 9.9 in a spare bedroom.

paladin
05-17-2010, 04:05 PM
In 1969 I had a "shotgun" house....where the living room is in front, the kitchen dining room in the middle, the bedroom in the back and the bathroom last. There was a small front porch, and a door to outside off the kitchen...the house was 12 feet wide. No furniture in the front room, clear plastic taped around the kitchen cabinets/stove and refrigerator and across the door to the bedroom as sort of airlock. During the winter months I had sawhorses and sheet ply on them in the kitchen/living room, making the frames, bulkheads, rudder, centerboard, centerboard case etc to the Brown Searunner 31, all like a giant model airplane kit....spring came and the strongback was set up outside the kitchen door.

Shang
05-17-2010, 04:13 PM
For nearly a year, each evening in the dining room I would crank down the blade on the table saw, remove the rip fence, throw a table cloth over the saw, pull up two saw horses for chairs, and serve dinner.

paladin
05-17-2010, 04:20 PM
I started a new dink in Nha Trang...every evening I would drive to Nha Trang from Dong Ba Thin Special forces camp, have dinner with the new bride and family, then go out back and work on the dink...I was cutting the ply and strips for strip planking etc...mom in law was aghast....No No NO I was told...an educated man does not work with his hands...you must hire old man to do such work, you teach him how to do it....Asian thinking.

David Tabor (sailordave)
05-17-2010, 05:34 PM
I think it is you WILL be a bachelor boat builder if...

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_MlvfQTkG04Q/R8YI4h4ox0I/AAAAAAAAADY/QmqU2xlMK8U/s400/GLEE.jpg

You strip a boat in the living room because the garage is too darned cold.

Your Freudian slip is showing...



Sorry, beat you to THAT! And I wasn't a bachelor back then...

Now... I think I do sweep out the shop more than the house.

http://myboatyard.homestead.com/files/canoe1.jpg


http://myboatyard.homestead.com/files/canoeriver.jpg

CharlieCobra
05-17-2010, 06:14 PM
Vacuum the house? Nah, I do vacuum the area I'm working on in Oh Joy daily, sometimes more. The boys vacuum the house instead. Hell, before we sprayed the Valiant, we vacuumed the entire SHOP!

SamSam
05-18-2010, 11:02 AM
I had a friend in a small 1 bedroom cottage who couldn't get rid of some fruitarians that had taken root in his sofabed. Verbal hints didn't work, but when he dragged his 19' Lightening into the living room and started to work on it, they decided to go visit someone else. I really don't think he did it on purpose, at least he denied it, but the action/reaction was a thing of beauty.

Yeadon
05-18-2010, 12:27 PM
It just occurred to me, I have both the plans for Penny Fee and a chart of the inside passage on my living room walls. They're both art and for "work."

switters
05-18-2010, 03:18 PM
my last kitchen was wall papered in fisher maps, different areas of the boundary waters. There were also some other canoe routes on various local rivers.

Going to look at condos tonight. The one I can get a 16' canoe in and out of wins.

Breakaway
05-18-2010, 03:27 PM
What in the world is a "fruitarian?"

kevin

SamSam
05-18-2010, 08:38 PM
What in the world is a "fruitarian?"

kevin
They only ate fruit, no meat, no vegetables. They were real young, real skinny and it seemed like they were always eating.

bljones
05-18-2010, 10:25 PM
Did you leave a trail of grapes to lead the fruitarians out of the house?

bljones
05-18-2010, 10:28 PM
You know you are a bachelor boat builder when you buy a sewing machine and make cushions, lee cloths and boom tents but still use bedsheets for curtains at home.

switters
11-24-2010, 02:31 PM
Moving the sofa, etc. tonight so I can fit the 12' summer breeze in the condo living room tomorrow for painting over the weekend. Temps too cold and kerosene to costly to paint in the shop.

Drop cloth: check
vent fan : check
paint: had it a while
Paint brush/roller: hope so, can't remember
permission from significant other: not required

switters
11-29-2010, 06:18 PM
http://i281.photobucket.com/albums/kk221/switters_bucket/IMAG0186.jpg

Peter Malcolm Jardine
11-29-2010, 06:42 PM
You know you're a bachelor boat builder when...

you eat dinner in the shop, and start stirring paint and stuff with your cutlery (forks work realllllly well!)

Breakaway
11-29-2010, 06:50 PM
...you build your sawhorses to the same height as your living room windowsills so you can work on long pieces like spars and keels in comfort and while watching football.

kevin

Canoez
11-30-2010, 08:59 AM
http://i281.photobucket.com/albums/kk221/switters_bucket/IMAG0186.jpg

Yup.

You're officially a bachelor boat-builder. And if you weren't a bachelor before, you will be! :D