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Captain Blight
03-30-2009, 10:10 PM
Oh my good Lloyd.

Don't get me wrong. I know she loves me unconditionally. I love her beyond words, I would kill for this woman but she is tapdancin' on my very last nerve right now.

I'm starting to understand my grandfather a little better, though.

oznabrag
03-30-2009, 10:27 PM
Oh my good Lloyd.

Don't get me wrong. I know she loves me unconditionally. I love her beyond words, I would kill for this woman but she is tapdancin' on my very last nerve right now.

I'm starting to understand my grandfather a little better, though.

Just take one more step back, enjoy the show, and, when you figure out what's really going on (by virtue of having taken one more step back!), assert your position as necessary (this step being predicated on the idea that she's got some inaccurate idea of your position. If this is not the case, refer to step one and take one more step back!), and proceed with life, and the slow parade of days.:)

Works at my house!

John T

Phil Heffernan
03-30-2009, 10:40 PM
Just take one more step back, enjoy the show, and, when you figure out what's really going on (by virtue of having taken one more step back!), assert your position as necessary (this step being predicated on the idea that she's got some inaccurate idea of your position. If this is not the case, refer to step one and take one more step back!), and proceed with life, and the slow parade of days.:)

Works at my house!

John T

Such good advice...

PH

Kaa
03-30-2009, 10:44 PM
Don't get me wrong. I know she loves me unconditionally. I love her beyond words, I would kill for this woman but she is tapdancin' on my very last nerve right now.

Kissing helps :-)

Kaa

oznabrag
03-30-2009, 10:50 PM
Kissing helps :-)

Kaa

ain't that the truth.:D

Yeadon
03-30-2009, 10:53 PM
Comment redacted.

Glen Longino
03-30-2009, 10:54 PM
Kissing helps :-)

Kaa
Sure, but how do you get out of the house and away from the wife so you can kiss the girlfriend? :confused:I'm running out of lies here! Got any new ones?:rolleyes::)

Captain Blight
03-30-2009, 10:57 PM
You guys aren't helping.

oznabrag
03-30-2009, 11:11 PM
You guys aren't helping.


Maybe...but we're tryin'!:D

John T

Flying Orca
03-31-2009, 06:51 AM
Good thing I don't need to rant, seeing as Oystagirl's a member too. :eek:

Wild Dingo
03-31-2009, 09:32 AM
SWIMPAL and SWMBO rants go here

YOUR BLOODY KIDDING RIGHT????

Dont get me started!!! :mad: could write a flamin book... or 10!!! :rolleyes:

Think like this

1) You will never be or do right
2) Whatever she says say "yes dear"
3) Never comment on her dress sence (refer to 1 above)
4) Be prepared to spend your life making copious amounts of money to please her (refer to 1 above)
5) Pleasing her is impossible (refer to 1 above
6) Go back and read 1 again

Sheilas :rolleyes:


:p

Kaa
03-31-2009, 09:40 AM
"Women, can't live with them, can't live without them." -- Desiderius Erasmus

:D

Kaa

James McMullen
03-31-2009, 10:04 AM
Every relationship needs a healthy bit of mutual incomprehension. Now it's your turn to do something she finds baffling and irritating. If you can find a way to keep up with her, it becomes a fascinating rhythmic and synergistic oscillation of wills.

Though of course, on my own part, I just look her in the eye, stick my hands up in the air and say, "I surrender!"

LeeG
03-31-2009, 10:05 AM
You guys aren't helping.

help is two doors down,,this is the bilge.

If she's stepping on your very last nerve you must have practice on all the proceeding ones. How about: armor , spontaneous regeneration, deflection?

Wild Dingo
03-31-2009, 10:09 AM
Of course as I dont know your or her ages this could be worse... you do realize that they just get worse as they age... ahem mature :p god help yer if shes over 40 and hell has just begun if shes over 50... surrender NOW if shes any older!!

strewth may as well just go eat snails as make sence of sheilas :D

Wild Dingo
03-31-2009, 10:11 AM
Ahem and as for this wee comment...

You guys aren't helping.

Actually mate we are helping in a big way! :cool: You just aint reading properly :D ...you can thank us later no wukkers ;)

huisjen
03-31-2009, 10:14 AM
My Step-Mother-Twice-Removed (thrice removed as of this coming weekend) once said, "It's no good getting a divorce. Then you just have to train another one."

Dan

Wild Dingo
03-31-2009, 10:17 AM
From now on Im havin "friends"... some with priviliges some without ;)

switters
03-31-2009, 10:49 AM
From now on Im havin "friends"... some with priviliges some without ;)

Amen to that.

hokiefan
03-31-2009, 10:59 AM
Kissing helps :-)

Kaa

Not if she's mad already, then its like gasoline on a fire.:eek:

I don't have any advice that works, plenty that doesn't however.

Cheers,

Bobby

Iceboy
03-31-2009, 11:04 AM
Know the difference between a wife and a crow?



Crows don't pick on you until you're dead!

S.V. Airlie
03-31-2009, 11:06 AM
Know the difference between a wife and a crow?



Crows don't pick on you until you're dead!

I think it should be " until after " you are dead...At least I hope so..

Captain Blight
03-31-2009, 11:10 AM
Oh god. Now she's not feeling well. So on top of having to scramble to get my Gizmo-business back on schedule, on top of having to move all my crap out of one apartment and into storage, on top of having to find a new place to live, I'm going to have to go make her chicken soup (I can't blame her for wanting my chicken soup, it's very good) and soothe her fevered brow. She's probably going to make me watch reruns of America's Next Top Model.

I am well and truly f*cked, boys. Hemingway f*cked.

LeeG
03-31-2009, 11:28 AM
Captain,,you're dropping hints ever so slowly. So she may be stepping on your last nerve but you also have a finite amount of nerve fibers. You may have to steel your heart and deny her one shared moment of Americas Top Model.

Iceboy
03-31-2009, 11:52 AM
"I think it should be " until after " you are dead...At least I hope so.."

Oops. Typing too fast. Thanks.

Uncle Duke
03-31-2009, 12:05 PM
Some smart guy once said:

There are two ways of arguing with a woman.

Neither one works.