PDA

View Full Version : What to do when you're fed up with your life.



Katherine
04-09-2008, 11:43 AM
Any one got any ideas?:rolleyes:

Kaa
04-09-2008, 11:45 AM
Change it.

Kaa

Nanoose
04-09-2008, 11:47 AM
Move! Very invigorating...at least for a while....

glenallen
04-09-2008, 11:48 AM
Change it.

Kaa

Can't say it better than that!
Give it lots of thought and do something different.
Some of my best times have been the result of making a big change.
Best wishes!

Popeye
04-09-2008, 11:51 AM
road trip !

http://www.dvdtimes.co.uk/images/MattDay/animalhousepink.jpg

Canoez
04-09-2008, 11:52 AM
http://i28.tinypic.com/mjrc6w.jpg


http://i29.tinypic.com/dpk66b.jpg

Leon m
04-09-2008, 11:52 AM
Visit a Japanese Garden.

Paul Pless
04-09-2008, 11:56 AM
Visit a Japanese Garden.:):):)

P.I. Stazzer-Newt
04-09-2008, 11:56 AM
Go fishing

Popeye
04-09-2008, 11:59 AM
hoist up yer kilt

TimH
04-09-2008, 12:00 PM
move south.

Kaa
04-09-2008, 12:00 PM
http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/interesting_life.png

Kaa

Tylerdurden
04-09-2008, 12:06 PM
Honestly, I wake up every morning considering putting a gun to my head as hope any of this will get better is pretty much gone.
Cannot do it though as it goes against everything I believe in and I refuse to harm my loved ones by such a selfish act. I lost a dear friend to it a few weeks back and the pain it caused everyone is awful.
I look around and know how easy it would be to turn everything off and insulate myself from the real world but again that would be easy and the long hard road has always been the exit I am headed for.
Just have faith that you still have a purpose to serve and that day is coming, you just have to hang on one more day. We touch each others lives in small ways that may be imperceptible now but soon it will all gel into one thought or action that will make all the pain worth while. There are no coincidences. Mark

Paul Pless
04-09-2008, 12:08 PM
move south.
that would make my life better
Find a new romantic interest. ;)you and tardevil have it out for me don't you;)

Tar Devil
04-09-2008, 12:12 PM
you and tardevil have it out for me don't you;)

Moi? How you figure?

Leon m
04-09-2008, 12:12 PM
Damn Mark!...I wish you some purpose my brother. Heres to better days

Popeye
04-09-2008, 12:15 PM
two wordshttp://www.hotelchatter.com/files/admin/Allegro_beach.jpgpunta cana

sunwing.ca (http://www.sunwing.ca/)

Leon m
04-09-2008, 12:16 PM
Two comments that have helped me...

Take care of the body and the mind will fallow.

Purpose doesn't find you, you find purpose.

Mrleft8
04-09-2008, 12:17 PM
Visit a Japanese Garden.
In Japan.

Leon m
04-09-2008, 12:21 PM
In Japan.

Actually there's a very nice one just outside Rockford Ill that I like to visit...But Japan will work too...let me know when ya get the tickets.:D

Tylerdurden
04-09-2008, 12:22 PM
Damn Mark!...I wish you some purpose my brother. Heres to better days

Spent the last years living to make sure my kids had a safe start.
They are all grown so the plan is to set sail to who knows where.
Problem is nothing is working in that direction and I am adrift.
I am working at my business but its all an act, I must say I do pretty well at. I would just as soon go build a tree house like the guy in Seattlehttp://www.woodenboat.com/forum/images/icons/icon12.gif
I am pretty washed up but I wouldn't change anything. Just would like to go to sleep knowing that the little guy still has a chance.

Kaa
04-09-2008, 12:22 PM
punta cana

Nah. Punta Cana is for vegetating under the sun. Not good for life changing.

Kaa

Mrleft8
04-09-2008, 12:24 PM
Tickets? Moi? I dunno theen so.... I don't care for Japan... But I think Katherine would enjoy it for a brief visit...
Another option of course is crime...... You could start out with simple fraud.....Say faking a company donation of a brand spankin' new 2wd P/U truck ..... to me.....:D

Leon m
04-09-2008, 12:26 PM
Just would like to go to sleep knowing that the little guy still has a chance.

AH...too much focus on the "little guy" issue...that stuff will drag you down man. It's good to care, but you must balance it out with the good that still exist.

Tar Devil
04-09-2008, 12:30 PM
More education, perhaps? I got a lot of hits when I Googled "School for maids."

John of Phoenix
04-09-2008, 12:31 PM
Two comments that have helped me...

Take care of the body and the mind will fallow.

Purpose doesn't find you, you find purpose.
Fallow. What an interesting typo.

glenallen
04-09-2008, 12:31 PM
Spent the last years living to make sure my kids had a safe start.
They are all grown so the plan is to set sail to who knows where.
Problem is nothing is working in that direction and I am adrift.
I am working at my business but its all an act, I must say I do pretty well at. I would just as soon go build a tree house like the guy in Seattlehttp://www.woodenboat.com/forum/images/icons/icon12.gif
I am pretty washed up but I wouldn't change anything. Just would like to go to sleep knowing that the little guy still has a chance.

Don't make me come up there and take you on as a rehab project!:D

boylesboats
04-09-2008, 12:32 PM
Head for boonies.... leave All Electronics Gizmos at home.. Just pack enough clothes and food.. Leave the car too... Borrow or kidnap a pack horse.. Live off the land till you declared dead, about 7 years...

Greg P H
04-09-2008, 12:38 PM
Change it.

Kaa

"We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them." Einstein

In other words, solve the 'problem' by moving up stream. Look at the facts, look at the story you've constructed around the facts, then Change the story. Shift the perspective.



“When you follow your bliss... doors will open where you would not have thought there would be doors; and where there wouldn't be a door for anyone else.” Joseph Campbell
The outer world is a reflection of the inner world. Changing what is inside, changes the outside.

" “We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us. The old skin has to be shed before the new one can come.” Joseph Campbell


Walking up to the edge is the hardest part, just jump!

peace

Leon m
04-09-2008, 12:39 PM
Fallow. What an interesting typo.

Fallow:a field left to rest...Maybe I ment to do that :p :D

elf
04-09-2008, 12:44 PM
Figure out what matters most and then how long you have to save to be willing to chase it.

Then work until you have enough and head on out.

capt jake
04-09-2008, 12:50 PM
Find an interest that gives YOU satisfaction. My interests are varied and depending upon my mood and what year it is, I go with that one. I am presently in my tractor and working in the yard mode. In a few months, it may be the boat, but who knows?

Curtail alcohol as it will bring you down without you noticing it much. Stay physical, work out or walk. I do neither, but work vigorously in the yard and on my projects.

Focus on what YOU can change an not on the things that you can not. Be nice, it is contagious. Volunteer work also can be an uplift (which reminds me, I need to enlist with Habitat for Humanity).

Tylerdurden
04-09-2008, 01:12 PM
Don't make me come up there and take you on as a rehab project!:D

No rehab required. late model high mileage. Cannot fight city hall for twenty years without lots of scars.http://www.woodenboat.com/forum/images/icons/icon12.gif

switters
04-09-2008, 01:23 PM
I plan vacations, a year in advance so I know I can really take the vacation. Not much money involved, most are camping trips or canoe camping lately. Boundary waters, Green river, next year I plan on the big swamp in north florida.

I also try to fish or at least get outside once a week on the canoe when the ice is off.

Bob Triggs
04-09-2008, 01:27 PM
Any one got any ideas?:rolleyes:

It does help to look at things, how one got where they are now etc. But beyond that making change is often the best cure. If one is ready for that kind of thing.

I have found that volunteering for worthy causes is a great uplift to my life. You can not go wrong when you are coming from your heart and giving your all for something that deserves it. There is nothing quite like teaming up with others for a higher goal. When we set aside personal interests for these giving efforts something beautiful emerges. The more constructive and philanthropic the cause is the better it seems to go. The world is full of need. You should have no trouble finding someone or some effort out there that could use your experience, time and support. Sometimes we find what we are looking for by simply giving- with no concern for a return. Love is the one thing that we can keep by giving it away.

"Into the hands of the giver the gift is given."

Henning 4148
04-09-2008, 01:51 PM
Well, I don't know about all aspects of your life, there seems to be a Paul or - well, I don't know.

But I know why I left a global player 8 1/2 years ago. For me, that was the right decision.

When you work for a global player, you are one of tenthousands. Everything is rationalized and standardized to ensure it is exchangeable. And that is the way they treat their people as well. It can't be any different. The job boxes are well defined, but there is little room for individualism and initiative. When you work for a smaller company, you are one of a few. If you carefully pick the company, it may well fit you much better. You may come back to being treated much more individually. And with the background at a global player, you should be very welcome in smaller companies, especially automotive in your case. You know how the big ones tick, what is important when dealing with them and so on.

Ok. work is only one aspect of life.

If you change that aspect and above mentioned Mr. Paul is still an issue, make sure you move much closer to him at the same time so your relationship has a real chance to take off.

I call it the "good girl effect", trying to excel at things other people make you believe are important and forgetting yourself and your partner about it, but believe me, the really important thing is going through life with a partner you like. Everything else is second priority. Difficult for good girls to understand.

I am past 40 now and had the chance to catch up with former classmates etc. on reunions in the last years. I was a bit shocked at how lonely some of the girls have become. The ones without partner. I believe one is drinking heavily, at least she looks like it. And I have followed up on an ex of me. Same story. Nice girl. Never took enough time for her partners. Always followed the priorities others gave her. Her parents , her bosses. Working a full time job and in her spare time working for her parents. Every partner she had eventually felt neglected and walked out. She is very lonely now. Very sad. I am really sorry for her, I really liked her, but I also walked out, then, all those years ago.

You are still young enough, you still have the chance. Make the changes that are necessary for your partnership to really take off.

ucb4ume
04-09-2008, 02:08 PM
Build a wooden boat.:) It's a long term goal. It gives you purpose. Each small task is an accomplishment that gives you pleasure and a feeling of accomplishment.

This is a wooden boat forum isin't it?

Henning 4148
04-09-2008, 02:35 PM
Oh, and when making the changes, do not make money a priority.

My salary went down when I left the global player, but it was worth it. Actually, as I moved into an area where living is cheaper, I had much better life quality for my work after the move.

Today, I make more, but that is another story, it is a story about being in an environment that suits me, an environment that encourages and rewards and not an environment that just demands and pressurizes people.

Tom Montgomery
04-09-2008, 02:56 PM
My mentor tells me that happiness is an inside job. He also says that if you want to change your life, change your friends.

davidagage
04-09-2008, 02:59 PM
move south.

This is an excellent choice and I can say, from experience..Works Great:D
Doesn't it Claudia;)

Michael s/v Sannyasin
04-09-2008, 02:59 PM
I've been in that spot a few times, and when I find that I am, that old Talking Heads song comes to mind.... Burning Down the House

Basically, just blow up your life. Sell all your stuff, or put it in storage, or someone's garage. Quit your job and move to some place that might be the last place you ever would have imagined moving.

What this does is it forces you to break up all of your old routines. It's the rut that really breaks your back over time.

I lived out of a KOA Kampground for a few weeks when I first moved to the East Coast, and it was the most freedom I've ever felt in my entire life.

You live in one of the most depressed parts of the country, and work in an industry that could be on the ropes (they might pull it out if they make some serious progress on alternative vehicles). So, it is no wonder you're fed up.

If you can't go to the extreme of quitting your job and moving, at least try to change up your routines. Try exercising in the mornings before heading off to work. Drive a different route to work, buy your coffee from a different place. Cut your hair, try a different style of clothes. There is new "energy" in new routines, so, try to mix it up.

PM me if you want someone to talk to.

Good Luck!

paladin
04-09-2008, 03:00 PM
Go sailing........not a power boat.......get lotsa books, music.......30-34 foot sailboat........listen to the waves, water, quiet....... maybe turn on the radio once a week....do not listen to the news.......

Chris Coose
04-09-2008, 03:06 PM
Don't try to solve it on your own.
Find an active, cheerleading therapist who listens good.

Tom Montgomery
04-09-2008, 03:09 PM
I agree. My mentor is a clinical social worker. ;)

Tylerdurden
04-09-2008, 03:12 PM
How can one find sanity in an insane world?

Besides sailing.

Gary E
04-09-2008, 03:20 PM
Finish the Owens... gas dont cost all that much..

Michael s/v Sannyasin
04-09-2008, 03:39 PM
Dancing helps too! Get out and shake your booty.

Lew Barrett
04-09-2008, 03:44 PM
Look for an opportunity to do something nice for somebody else. Not for the SO. Not for any return. Something that costs you by way of your time and energy. Something important. Go be a Big Sister. Volunteer at your local hospice.....or one down south!
That's always good for the blahs.

Just saw Bob Trigg's advice, and note that we agree on this approach.

TomF
04-09-2008, 03:47 PM
Too much advice out there:

From songs:
"give a little whistle"
"put on a happy face"
" ... I climb right up to the top of the stairs ..."

Or you can re-read the first paragraph of Moby Dick ...

But me? I'd try to see if the mood's a passing thing, or a true rut. If it's passing, then sleep, a movie, or maybe an energetic visit to Paul would do the trick. Maybe all three.

If it's a long-standing malaise, then yeah - take stock, and change your life. You're single and childless, so despite what you feel, you've got far fewer restrictions on major life-change than many. Volunteer somewhere. Sell the stuff that you need a big $ job to support, and start working at something you truly love for a lot less. Learn to play an instrument, or to paint.

Phillip Allen
04-09-2008, 03:48 PM
spring fever

cs
04-09-2008, 03:49 PM
A little bit of Marley picks me up.

Bob Marley (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rnDrbagYm24)

Chad

Paul Pless
04-09-2008, 03:52 PM
How can one find sanity in an insane world?

Besides sailing.Lots of austere options besides sailing. Some people go to mountains, others to deserts; I know a couple that started walking down here on the Alabama/Georgia line and didn't stop until they had reached the top of Katahdin.

Joe (SoCal)
04-09-2008, 03:57 PM
Go south, eat gooood BBQ, drink cold beer with someone ya love ;)

Ok seriouse answer think in FIVE year chunks. Where you are and what your doing is not what you will be in FIVE years. I remember when I was 30 had one key, a apt and enough money for beer. Five years later I was married with my own company and employees, a big house with a wife a child a couple of cars and boats and responibke for two people renting above my barn. FIVE years later 9/11 and it all changed. Anouther FIVE years and I'm living in an apt and involved with someone else.

Life is funny that way and if you can think in FIVE year terms you will be fine.

PeterSibley
04-09-2008, 04:01 PM
Hey Chad .............thanks for that !!! I brightened my day .:)

P.I. Stazzer-Newt
04-09-2008, 04:06 PM
This is a sig. from a guy whose posts I usually admire

If you're not having a good time, what are you doing about it !

John Turpin
04-09-2008, 04:06 PM
Sail through a storm. That always fixes it for me.

hokiefan
04-09-2008, 04:21 PM
A lot of really good advice here. My $0.02 for what its worth.

First, answer the question, what exactly are you fed up with? Job, family, house, SO (doesn't seem like it, but what do I know?), distance from SO, etc? A really honest answer to this question can take some soal searching, or you may already know the answer.

Then, can you change, or are you willing to change whatever is the issue? If its not something you can change, realizing that can often be empowering. Just knowing where you stand often gives you the strength to work with it.

Then, decide what, if anything, you are going to change and get on with it.

Sometimes talking through this with a counselor is really helpful. Your employer probably has an Employee Assistance Program that includes a reasonable number of counselling visits already covered. Use it. I recommend it highly from personal experience, it helps to have someone to talk to that isn't involved.

Personally, sometimes I just need to kick back for a few minutes and listen to some of my old favorite music. That can work wonders for a temporary funk. Or crank it up on a drive.

Cheers,

Bobby

Memphis Mike
04-09-2008, 04:39 PM
Drop some acid.

Tylerdurden
04-09-2008, 04:43 PM
Drop some acid.

That explains it.http://www.woodenboat.com/forum/images/icons/icon10.gif

The Bigfella
04-09-2008, 04:58 PM
Come sit on the Great Barrier Reef for a week. (yeah tell Paul to come too)

Tar Devil
04-09-2008, 05:06 PM
Dancing helps too! Get out and shake your booty.

Paul, please take pictures!! :D

Bill Lowe
04-09-2008, 05:20 PM
Wow lots of solutions but whats going on. Why are you feeling so down. I have enjoyed your input on the forem and I Hope all is OK

Nanoose
04-09-2008, 05:53 PM
Get married!! :eek: :D

That'll take your mind off things for a while, at least....

Chris Coose
04-09-2008, 06:02 PM
In lieu of being able to perform as your personal cheerleading therapist, I send to this little ditty:

and a
one and a
two

http://www.geocities.com/fang_club/bright_side_of_life.jpg

Some things in life are bad,
They can really make you mad,
Other things just make you swear and curse,
When you're chewing life's gristle,
Don't grumble,
Give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistle]
Always look on the light side of life.
[whistle]

If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten,
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps,
Don't be silly chumps.
Just purse your lips and whistle.
That's the thing.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
[whistle]
Always look on the right side of life,
[whistle]

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word.
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin.
Give the audience a grin.
Enjoy it. It's your last chance, anyhow.
So,...

Always look on the bright side of death,
[whistle]
Just before you draw your terminal breath.
[whistle]

Life's a piece of ****,
When you look at it.
Life's a laugh and death's a joke it's true.
You'll see it's all a show.
Keep 'em laughing as you go.
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.
And...

Always look on the bright side of life.
Always look on the right side of life.
[whistle]

Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]
Always look on the bright side of life!
[whistle]

Repeat to fade...

mmd
04-09-2008, 06:27 PM
Sounds like a need for Beer Bottle Therapy...

A friend introduced me to this therapy once, long ago, during a period of extreme frustration & stress. First, get yourself about two dozen empty beer bottles (it doesn't matter how you make them empty...). Here in Canada, eh? this is know as a "two-four", or a warm-up kit. You will also need a hammer, a nail, a piece of string about four feet long, a broom, dustpan and waste can. Take the hammer and drive the nail into the last overhead floor joist of an unfinished basement or garage. Tie the string to it, then tie the other end 'round the neck of one of the beer bottles, so that it hangs about chest height a foot or two out from the concrete wall. Now take the remaining 23 dead soldiers and schlepp your way to the other end of the room. Using the most exaggerated baseball wind-up you can channel, throw an empty bottle at the hanging one, attempting to break both with one pitch. You will most likely miss, and the thrown bottle will smash against the concrete wall with a most satisfying crash. Repeat until either you feel better or all the bottles are gone. When finished, just sweep up all the busted glass and put it in the waste can.

Smashing stuff when you are frustrated feels so good, and this way you aren't smashing anything good, valuable, or someone else's. The physical workout will reduce stress, and the sound of breaking glass will do wonders for your psyche. When you are done, there is no evidence of your controlled tantrum and you will be in a much better frame of mind to deal with the sitation that drove you to beer-bottle therapy in the first place.

Of course, the first time I went to therapy I was really bummed out, so my friend prescribed the full intervention process - we played with full bottles and I had to drain each projectile before throwing it, and there wasn't a sink nearby.

I don't think that I recall leaving my first therapy session, but I do recall feeling better... <wink, grin>

jack grebe
04-09-2008, 06:34 PM
Basically, just blow up your life. Sell all your stuff, or put it in storage, or someone's garage. Quit your job and move to some place that might be the last place you ever would have imagined moving.


Sheeeeeeeit, I made a life outta doing that:D.
Getting ready to fire up the MH the begining of May.......again:cool:.

Saltiguy
04-09-2008, 06:38 PM
30 years ago, I visited Florida, and early one morning I had my epifany. Beautiful sky, clear water, birds swirling, dolphins feeding, white sand, clean air, and I sat there thinking.... "what the hell am I doing with my life?"
I had spent years in an empty marriage, working too hard and with no purpose except to be a unappreciated and un-loved provider.
I began a plan and decided that when my son graduated college, I would change my life.
Here's what I did. 1. I started planning. 2. I bought a little house in Florida. 3. When my son graduated, I went to an attorney, got a quit=claim deed for the house, wrapped it in a jewelery box with fancy paper with a $5.00 ribbon and presented it to my wife along with the majority of our savings and my best wishes for a happy future . 4. I left New England with only a few clothes, my tools and a few family heirlooms. 5. Driving to Florida, I sang "Beyond the Blue Horizon" at the top of my lungs every hour or so ( very therapudic.) 6. In Florida, I met the most amazing woman. Beautiful, brillaint, funny, low maintenance lovely and sexy. The love of my life. We live the idyllic life - Florida style. I operate a charter boat, she gardens, and creates a perfect nest where we live, love and laugh.

Tanbark Spanker
04-09-2008, 06:39 PM
I try to ignore feelings like that. However, they are not always unproductive. They could mean a little change in attitude is needed. I take great comfort and always feel renewed with my mantra: what could possibly happen next.

David Tabor (sailordave)
04-09-2008, 06:43 PM
Any one got any ideas?:rolleyes:

Hmmmmm. Move South and Get married were two suggestions. :eek:

I'd say move south and get a job driving a tractor for Pooh.


And FWIW.... (Women get married hoping he'll change.... Men get married hoping she doesn't):p



SERIOUSLY... what have you got tying you down to MI? You can pick up and go... Take a sabbatical for 6 months..


Me, I can't do anything; work has golden handcuffs on me for a few more years. Kids are still in school and even though THAT is not a good situation I need to stay in the area.

LeeG
04-09-2008, 06:51 PM
Any one got any ideas?:rolleyes:


find different food, you might be starving and not know it, metaphorically speaking of course.

Tylerdurden
04-09-2008, 06:51 PM
I am definetly gonna pack the boat and Go hang with Hugo.:D

Ron Carter
04-09-2008, 07:08 PM
Get the hell out of the automotive industry. I got downsized. Best thing that ever happened to me.

paladin
04-09-2008, 07:36 PM
Katherine...that's why I went sailing......
I worked...long hours, very intense times, little sleep so after about 3 months I would bail out and disappear for 2 weeks at a time.....go back to work....after 3 months take 30 days off......6 more months then it would be 60 days, then start all over again.....but you have to get completely away from work.....work on the boat at your parents.....anything...but get completely away. In my case, they couldn't find me.....no cell phones...the high seas radio was off...I would check in just before going back to work......take up scuba, go to Grand Cayman or Cayman Brac for a week or two, lay on the beach......sip rum and OJ, or tequila...if Paul is nice to you, take him along....if not, take me along...I need a vacation too, or a place to hide out.....

skuthorp
04-09-2008, 07:39 PM
Get on a plane and go touring up north with Dingo, I'm sure he'd welcome the company.

bamamick
04-09-2008, 07:42 PM
I can't afford to get fed up with my life. Too many people depend on me to be there and be strong for them. Of course, you guys know from reading my posts that I get fed up all of the time, I just don't let anyone know it other than you if I can get away with it.

I'd like to say that sailing does the trick for me, but in my case 'sailing' almost always means 'racing', and that can add stress rather than relieve it. Yard work keeps my mind off of things, but I constantly worry about what I have to do next and the jobs never seem to end. In all honesty I can say that the very best way for both my wife and I to relieve stress is to just get out of here. Go someplace where phones don't ring and we don't know anyone. Quite honestly it seems that we can wipe away months of tough times by spending one night alone and away together.

My wife runs the business side of one of the largest restaurants in the state of Alabama (Paul has been there). She suffers from stress more than I do, though she handles it better. All I do is run 500 million dollars worth of equipment all the time. Equipment that in a lot of cases will kill you if it's in a bad mood. We've raised three kids. Been through some very tough times. Getting away has always been our answer. I know that it's not a permanant answer, but it'll help you make it through for just awhile longer, until a more permanant answer can be found.

Whatever you do, I wish you the very best.

Mickey Lake

jack grebe
04-09-2008, 08:02 PM
if Paul is nice to you, take him along....if not, take me along...I need a vacation too,
LMAO:D

Katherine
04-09-2008, 08:12 PM
Maybe I should take both.:D

paladin
04-09-2008, 08:16 PM
Now if ya really wanna get away.....There's this shack, just north, northeast over the mountain ridge about 75 miles from San Pedro Sula, Honduras.....old Spanish gold mine......fresh running water, no electricity, cell phones won't work there, charcoal for cooking, outdoor outhouse, but a small waterfall and pool about 4 feet deep, cool, almost cold fresh mountain water.......I'll give you a pan and show you how to pan for nuggets......no motor vehicles...airstrip is old "company" airstrip about 15 miles away, burro transport last few miles....pack in your own groceries, but there's plenty of fruit this time of year, bbq running around on the hoof, take along some rice, salt and pepper, coffee and a few essentials......NOBODY will bother ya......a bandit once in a while, but they don't like folks with shotguns....

cs
04-09-2008, 08:22 PM
Hey Chad .............thanks for that !!! I brightened my day .:)

Not a problem, why do you think that I have it saved in my favorites?

Chad

Rum_Pirate
04-09-2008, 08:37 PM
Streets of London http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4TUXAb_7A1c

Have you seen the old man
In the closed-down market
Kicking up the paper,
with his worn out shoes?
In his eyes you see no pride
And held loosely at his side
Yesterday's paper telling yesterday's news

So how can you tell me you're lonely,
And say for you that the sun don't shine?
Let me take you by the hand and lead you through the streets of London
I'll show you something to make you change your mind

Have you seen the old girl
Who walks the streets of London
Dirt in her hair and her clothes in rags?
She's no time for talking,
She just keeps right on walking
Carrying her home in two carrier bags.

Chorus

In the all night cafe
At a quarter past eleven,
Same old man is sitting there on his own
Looking at the world
Over the rim of his tea-cup,
Each tea last an hour
Then he wanders home alone

Chorus

And have you seen the old man
Outside the seaman's mission
Memory fading with
The medal ribbons that he wears.
In our winter city,
The rain cries a little pity
For one more forgotten hero
And a world that doesn't care

Chorus

++++++++++

Happiness is not what you think you want

but is being content with what you have.

Get out and lend a hand in a soup kitchen, visit patients on a terminal ward that dont have anyone to visit them you will soon find your mind changing.

Alternatively head to a warm clime, strip off sit on a beach and sip an ice cold beer watching until the sun goes down for a week or so.

Paul Fitzgerald
04-09-2008, 08:41 PM
Ask not what life can do for you,
Ask rather what you can do for life.

Saltiguy
04-09-2008, 09:02 PM
30 years ago, my life was barely tolerable, and one winter i went on Vacation in Florida, and that is where I had my wake-up call.
I was on the beach early one morning. Beautiful sky, clear water, white sand, dolphins feeding, birds swooping, 78 degrees, and I said to myself "what the hell are you doing with your life?" That was it.

My marriage was empty. I had become the un loved and unappreciated "provider". My rut was deep and lonely, but I was resolved to stay the course until my son graduated college. In the meantime, I began my plan for a new life. (1) I bought a little vacation house in Florida. (2) When my son graduated, I went to a lawyer and had a quit-claim deed done giving the big house to my wife. I wrapped the deed in a jewelery box with fancy paper with a $5.00 bow and presented it to my wife along with the majority of our savings, and my best wishes for her future. (3) I packed my car with only a few clothes and my tools (gave everything else away) and headed to Florida. (4) On the way to Florida I sang "Beyond the Blue Horizon" at the top of my lungs about twice an hour. I still tear-up a bit when I think of the absolute liberation I felt on that drive. (5) In Florida, I met my dream-girl. She's pretty, brilliant, funny, sexy and educated. We are a perfect team and live an idyllic life - Florida style. I run a charter boat, and she gardens and creates a perfect nest for us. I never imagined I could be so happy!

Nanoose
04-09-2008, 09:11 PM
Sell up and sail.

John B
04-09-2008, 09:23 PM
Its all about setting a goal or three isn't it, a plan to work to as said above.
Hey, at least you're coming out of winter there, whereas here its the doom and gloom of an Auckland notsummer. I hate winter, therefore I hate everything about now.

oldsub86
04-09-2008, 09:45 PM
You never said what it is that you are fed up with. If you can answer and explain exactly what it is that is wrong, then you can likely answer your own question.

Randy

Flitch
04-09-2008, 10:06 PM
"Many years ago, I woke up in a horrible moment of clarity and realized that my life was only a series of mirages… realities that did not exist except in my own mind. And in that horrible, yet beautiful moment that changed so many lives, I realized that it wasn’t too late to change the course of my own life. I didn’t know how to do it but I knew I had to try. And I have tried… Oh I have stumbled and probably taken the long way to get to wherever it is that I am but I knew no other way… How could I return to the lies I used to tell myself? Failure is such a tough medicine to swallow… especially when it is self-inflicted. And still I’d rather stumble on than curl up in a corner and whimper for the rest of my miserable life. And so I choose to stumble on… up a lonely road on a quest for whatever it is that I seek."

I wrote this several years ago and I think it captured the essence of a life change for me.. now I am the happiest person on the planet and I wouldn't change a thing.
Flitch

Michael Beckman
04-09-2008, 10:20 PM
Go south, eat gooood BBQ, drink cold beer with someone ya love ;)

Ok seriouse answer think in FIVE year chunks. Where you are and what your doing is not what you will be in FIVE years. I remember when I was 30 had one key, a apt and enough money for beer. Five years later I was married with my own company and employees, a big house with a wife a child a couple of cars and boats and responibke for two people renting above my barn. FIVE years later 9/11 and it all changed. Anouther FIVE years and I'm living in an apt and involved with someone else.

Life is funny that way and if you can think in FIVE year terms you will be fine.

5 years ago I was 12, didn't care about boats at all, or even girls for that matter. Life was simple. Also I was short and fat.

I wouldn't go back to that for anything. >_>

S B
04-09-2008, 10:43 PM
Sell it on ebay, that's what happens to everything here, people have grown tired of.

djswan
04-09-2008, 11:12 PM
How about moving somewhere new? We're planning that now.

boylesboats
04-10-2008, 12:15 AM
5 years ago I was 12, didn't care about boats at all, or even girls for that matter. Life was simple. Also I was short and fat.

I wouldn't go back to that for anything. >_>

I didn't know you're that young, wow.. :cool:

boylesboats
04-10-2008, 12:21 AM
Go south, eat gooood BBQ, drink cold beer with someone ya love ;)

Ok seriouse answer think in FIVE year chunks. Where you are and what your doing is not what you will be in FIVE years. I remember when I was 30 had one key, a apt and enough money for beer. Five years later I was married with my own company and employees, a big house with a wife a child a couple of cars and boats and responibke for two people renting above my barn. FIVE years later 9/11 and it all changed. Anouther FIVE years and I'm living in an apt and involved with someone else.

Life is funny that way and if you can think in FIVE year terms you will be fine.

Lot of things can happen in five years chunk... Sometime it'll make you think it just happen yesterday..

LeeG
04-10-2008, 12:26 AM
Michael has many fans around here.

SchoonerRat
04-10-2008, 01:13 AM
My Daddy once told me-
"Change your diet or change your sex life"

Both approaches have worked for me over the years!

Paul Pless
04-10-2008, 06:57 AM
Michael has many fans around here.Yup, the 'short and fat' comment was priceless.:D

Tylerdurden
04-10-2008, 07:03 AM
I like Mike.

PeterSibley
04-10-2008, 07:08 AM
Not a problem, why do you think that I have it saved in my favorites?

Chad

and I sent the link to my marley lovin' daughter :D

cs
04-10-2008, 07:10 AM
Well you had better send here this one (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uteBX4_wxXk) also. It is another one that I have save in my favorites and is great.

Chad

Popeye
04-10-2008, 07:10 AM
you can get quite a rush from stamp collecting

LeeG
04-10-2008, 08:35 AM
Yup, the 'short and fat' comment was priceless.:D


described me at 12, then of course like Michael by 17 I became a tall 5'9" handsome playboy athlete. Now at 52 I'm closer to how I looked at 12 but still a legend.

What about Katherine? Somewhere between Lew, Leon and Popeye is the answer.

Katherine
04-10-2008, 11:57 AM
Finish my boat and move south, if only . . . :rolleyes:

Nanoose
04-10-2008, 12:57 PM
Watching metal rust is always an option...

Kaa
04-10-2008, 01:15 PM
Finish my boat and move south, if only . . . :rolleyes:

You don't have a history of SAD -- seasonal affective disorder -- by any chance?

If so, moving south might help, if not, not very likely...

Kaa

Gary E
04-10-2008, 01:17 PM
Finish my boat and move south, if only . . . :rolleyes:

Slap a little paint on it... rig the interior for camping
Truck it to Chicago where you put it in the water and go down river to the Mississippi.. keep going down stream...etc ...

Write a book about the trip...make a mil$ with the sales... trade the boat for a yacht and drift over to the Islands....
Who would not want to go along on that trip???

Henning 4148
04-10-2008, 01:26 PM
Work out alternatives to your current situation.

Start with a search for companies down south much closer to am Paul you could work for. You can do it on the internet nowadays, you know.

Then apply for a job with those companies.

Have interviews.

If you get offers, it is the time to make a decision. You do not have to do that before. But until then, you have to put effort into developing these alternatives.

Or apply directly for a job with am Paul.

Be aware - chances don't stay available forever. They are windows that open and close as time moves on.

Henning 4148
04-12-2008, 05:35 AM
Finish my boat and move south, if only . . . :rolleyes:

And this "if only" is something that influences your decision, ties you to a live you don't like any more etc. Ok.

I am sure some of the oldtimers here might have a lot of personal experience with your "if only" or similar "if only's", there are few "if only's" that have not been around before, in this world, in time. Probably, the "if only's" around today are the same that were around in Roman times. But - as you are not willing to share it, it is not possible for them to share their experience and point of view on your "if only" with you.

Catch 22? Or stuck in the comfort zone?

By the way, as commented by others, you do not have to finish the boat before you move south. There are options. It can be moved south as is to complete the restoration there, it can be sold, it can be given away, it can be stored as is, the finishing can be outsourced, ... An unfinished wooden boat is no real reason not to move south.

Building / repairing a wooden boat is a great thing, but building a partnership is far more important.

So - the boat is not the real reason you are not going south. The "if only" is. What options do you have regarding the "if only"? Can you move your "if only" south as well, can you sell it, can you give it away, can you store it, can you outsource it, is it enough to look after it every 2 months for a weekend?

David Tabor (sailordave)
04-12-2008, 06:10 AM
I became a tall 5'9" handsome playboy athlete.

5'9" is TALL?:confused:


6' Yeah.

5'9":p

paladin
04-12-2008, 08:07 AM
5'9" is standup headroom in my newly drawed boat.....

Gary E
04-12-2008, 08:37 AM
6 ft is tall?????? for a migit maybe

I'm 6'6 and I'm the SHORT one in my family
little bro is 6'10.. and my Sons are 6'8

No wonder you guys can live with little boats... little cars...little....

merlinron
04-12-2008, 08:50 AM
i think everyone goes through that" fed up with my life " period at some time. immerse yourself in something you really enjoy doing, something you could get passionate about, and if it goes that direction, let it happen. don't worry about people telling you you're letting it run your life. for the time being you need the distraction. for the while consider your job a means to enjoy your intrest/passion and nothing else.
i was in that boat a few years ago and got back into archery, which i always loved. started shooting competively and went to the vegas tourney a few times. what i found out was that i really missed shooting, which i had done all my younger years and stopped completely and abruptly when i got married and started raising a family. after a few years of shooting intensively, and hearing people(SWMBO especially) tell me i'm too into it, i sort of fizzled out on it at it's own pace and got back to living a more balanced life. i got that missing archery void that i didn't realize was internally eating me, taken care of and it's much easier to deal with everyday, hum-drum life now. i can leave work at work, and jump in and out of other intrests without dragging them along with me all time.

Nicholas Scheuer
04-12-2008, 09:17 AM
5'-9" is tall for a woman. Gayle is 5'-10", and I'm into that.

Sorry to hear your headroom is only 5'-9" inches, Paladin! I'm 6'-1" and Balckbird is one of my all-time favorite designs, though I'd want to stretch one of my own a bit, too.

Seriously, it would appear you've done a fine job of drawing a larger rendition.

Moby Nick

Katherine
04-12-2008, 09:23 AM
Still frustrated by stuff, but I cleaned house and made muffins this morning (I like to bake). Seemed like a good idea and they are tasty. I've actually been mulling over what to do about the Owens, but haven't come up with an answer yet. At least on that boat Paul can stand upright.:D

Lew Barrett
04-12-2008, 09:42 AM
I've been thinking about this thread and have come up with a possible answer:

This too shall pass.

S.V. Airlie
04-12-2008, 10:04 AM
I've been thinking about this thread and have come up with a possible answer:

This too shall pass.

Umm, and Lew has a few clean diapers he can mail to you..ummmm:p:p;)

Seriously Kat.. what are ya gonna do with the Owens?

S/V Laura Ellen
04-12-2008, 10:26 AM
You all have it wrong.

Katherine should load her car up will all that fresh baking and head out to visit a fellow forumite.:rolleyes:

Wild Dingo
04-12-2008, 10:49 AM
What to do when you're fed up with your life... Any one got any ideas?:rolleyes:

Move to Broome???... Well thats my plan in a few months!!! :cool:

Rigadog
04-12-2008, 10:52 AM
Read Thomas Paine.

S.V. Airlie
04-12-2008, 10:58 AM
Move to Broome???... Well thats my plan in a few months!!! :cool:

Gonna make a clean sweep of it? Good ideeeee.. Shane..

Lew Barrett
04-12-2008, 11:02 AM
Umm, and Lew has a few clean diapers he can mail to you..ummmm:p:p;)

Seriously Kat.. what are ya gonna do with the Owens?

In and of themselves, of little value except as rags. Used as intended, they portend a life changing event!

paladin
04-12-2008, 12:37 PM
once upon a time I had a sign behind my desk.....literally translated from the Latin
"Don't let the bastards grind you down".....
and think of how silly they would look running around in their shorts and sox.....

Paul Pless
04-12-2008, 06:16 PM
In and of themselves, of little value except as rags. Used as intended, they portend a life changing event!
You talking about woodenboats or diapers ther fella???

Katherine
04-13-2008, 01:03 PM
I made an unexpected trip to my parent's house this weekend to recover the Owens. The latest round of storms had knocked the tarp off. I forgot just how much I missed being around it. Dad was on the road but I go to have a great visit with my mother and help my nephew celebrate his 4th birthday.:)

paladin
04-13-2008, 03:30 PM
You're gonna need a BIG dinghy to tow behind the Owens, what with all the four footed critters the two of you have.......

Katherine
04-13-2008, 03:31 PM
Noah's ark.:rolleyes:

Tristan
04-13-2008, 03:59 PM
1. Figure out what's bringing you down (as others have said, a good therapist can help). Usually it's relationships, job, or family, though it could be health. 2. Take action to make the changes that will solve what's wrong.

Tristan
04-13-2008, 04:09 PM
Talk to God about it. You and He are the only ones who can do much about your level of satisfaction. And if what you've been doing isn't working for you. It can't hurt to give him a try.

Yep, or talk to the Buddha within, or talk to Shakti, or Ganesh, or Jesus, or Hanuman, or Parvati, or Padmasambavha, or Zeus, or Kali, or Durga, or, . . . well, maybe talk to some friends or a therapist too.

brad9798
04-13-2008, 09:01 PM
Kat-

Life can be strange ... most of us are afraid to truly pursue that which WANT to pursue ... too many nay-sayers ... too much discomfort about how we have been told to feel about certain actions, choices.

I say SCREW that ... do what you love ... (remember my old signature?).

Life is short ... and like Mark Twain said: "You will be more disappointed in the next 20 years by what you did NOT do as opposed to what you DID do!" (paraphrased)

I have lost a child ... a wife ... much time with my kids ... I'll be damned if I lose my desire to live.

GET OUT AND DO SOMETHING!

Most folks punch a clock, live in a cubicle, etc. ... they are too afraid to lay it out ... take THAT chance ... make some silly things happen.

Why?

brad9798
04-13-2008, 09:05 PM
Other suggestions ...

Give blood when you can.

Donate some food to the poor.

Drive an elderly person to church or the store.

Pay for someone's gas ... at random.

Give money to a 'bum.'

Life happens in between the established lines.

Go to a strange church to enjoy the music.

Cut your neighbor's yard.

Wash their car.

I find/gain a funny/unique/strange satisfaction on a weekly basis, as I do/have done all of the abov WEEKLY for quite a while.

Good kharma has no substitute!

Good luck to you, lady!

:)

garland reese
04-13-2008, 09:19 PM
Make some time to do something you love. Or find something you enjoy. Make time to take care of yourself, heart and body and soul. Time on the water in some fashion is always good.

A few years ago, when I met Kathleen, I gave ballroom dancing a try. I never danced before. I found it intimidating, challenging beyond most anything I'd ever done. I thought I'd quit. I'm not much good, and am still very rudimentary in my abilities (and I still cannot Salsa), but now I can take Kat out and dance a little bit. And oddly enough, it takes the edge off stressful times. It seems strange that an activity that I find to be pretty stressful actually eases some of the other stresses of the day. As for me, a nice rhumba with Kat takes me to a glorious place. ;)


Cheesy advice, I know.... I hope things get a little better for you Katherine. Be well lovely one.

Hwyl
04-14-2008, 05:45 AM
I'm surprised by this thread.

I've always admired and envied your lifestyle.

You have parents that love you and have showed you some different ways of doing things.

You have a great job in a man's world.

You stick by your opinions.

You have a BF that's almost as good looking as me.

You're (ahem) "hot".

Seems all your options are good ones. Count you gorshduned blessings.

Please accept a virtual wake up and smell the coffee call (would have said "spank" but then there are these issues with Scot and Paul)

See you in Mystic.

Here's some of Chad's medicine http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MnJgIq48C9k

Rigadog
04-14-2008, 07:00 AM
Join the Peace Corps, see how the other half lives?

P.I. Stazzer-Newt
04-14-2008, 07:10 AM
Do something, Doesn't matter if its a new thing or an old thing - but something you've not done for at least five years.

When was the last time you picked up a Sax?
Or learned a new handicraft (http://www.readicut.co.uk/)
Or went jiving?

Rigadog
04-14-2008, 07:14 AM
Or you could join the "Feeble Crew"... Avast!!!

http://feeblecrew.com/feeble-crew.html



Huge Sharpie round the world sailing adventure

Tylerdurden
04-14-2008, 07:44 AM
Katherine... Do you still have the "Bong hits for Jesus" T-shirt?

Put it on, Light up a big fattie and relax. Its just the end of the world no big dealhttp://www.woodenboat.com/forum/images/icons/icon10.gif

Saltiguy
04-14-2008, 08:02 AM
Here's a metaphore for living that I heard in an AA meeting:
Your life is a big bus, and you are the driver. You are in charge. You already have some people on your bus, but you can pick-up or discharge people at will. As you drive along, people will be standing on the roadside wanting to get on your bus. Discriminate! Pick up only those people who will bring happiness to your bus, and go right by the others. Do not pick up "toxic" people.
How about the people already on your bus? Are some of THEM toxic? Perhaps you have some (so-called) loved ones on your bus, an employer or even a spouse. Think about pulling your bus over, and asking them to get off. If they are toxic, and are spoiling the entire atmosphere on your bus, this is something you should seriously consider. Alanon uses a phrase - "detach with love" - a perfect way of saying it.
You can create your own happy life if you are willing to listen, think and act. By making good thoughtful decisions you can change your life, one bus stop at a time.

Tylerdurden
04-14-2008, 08:06 AM
You need to be on my bus.

On my bus we don't discriminate but if your stupid or selfish and self centered you may find you are a little sore when you finally get off.

Everybody needs a ride, some need to be ridden harder.http://www.woodenboat.com/forum/images/icons/icon12.gif

Henning 4148
04-14-2008, 02:00 PM
... if only ...

There is one more thing about "if only" I've come up with.

If only you could be sure that it will work.

You can't be sure. Full stop. All you can do is decide that you are going to give it a try and put your best effort in it. That's it. No being sure.

Without giving it a try and putting your best effort in, it is not going to work. That is clear.

With giving it a try and putting your best effort in - chances are it is going to work. But no guarantee.

Katherine
04-14-2008, 07:59 PM
Don't get me wrong, I've been very fortunate in my life so far. I know this and thank God every day for it. It's just some days . . .:rolleyes:

Wild Wassa
04-14-2008, 08:27 PM
It is too easy to lose touch with nature.

"Lose touch with nature lose touch with yourself." Goethe.

This high tech world wears us out more than we think. I was listening to an interview with a scientist from the US who was on the ABC radio science program. He was saying that our lives are getting noisier and that the stress caused by the increase of noise, especially at night when we are asleep, is shownig the same levels of detriment to our health from increasing stress, similar to the figures of deteriorating health caused by smoking.

Go and walk in a canyon or up on a cliff rim and listen to the wind and to the birds, then go for a walk in a forest and don't make a sound. It is like hitting Ctrl + Alt + Delete in your personal computer. I do this once a week ... sometimes as short a time as an hour.

Warren

Tanbark Spanker
04-14-2008, 08:38 PM
I found inspiration in the Dalai Lama's list in the post here today. Now I feel a little bit better as I wonder what could possibly happen next.

Pernicious Atavist
04-14-2008, 08:42 PM
take up fly fishing
move
ride a horse solo across the rockies
figure out what makes your heart pump and do it, regardless of what others believe
i've done all that and it's finally working

Rational Root
04-16-2008, 05:22 PM
If it's just a crap day, tomorrow will be better.

If it's more, then once you realise that you are not happy, you can change things.

Many people go through life unhappy, and unaware that things could ever be any different.

Cliched as it is - The rest of your life starts Today.

Dave

mmd
04-16-2008, 05:26 PM
(I still like the idea of beer-bottle therapy, though... <wink>)

Tylerdurden
04-16-2008, 05:44 PM
Leave the house without anything besides warm clothing and 20 dollars. Live on the streets for a weekend.

You will definitely learn something about the world and yourself in 48 hrs.

CGrant
04-16-2008, 06:30 PM
I'd go with a combo of advice from Elf, Henning, and Hokie.

Most people have been where you are, including me. I made a total career change at 34. I found that while that was a real positive in many ways, the ultimate answers to the questions you're posing still followed me into the new career.

You're young with few things to tie you down. That's a plus, as others here have mentioned. You're in an industry that has a dark future, at least short term, and a questionable future long term. You likely have many transferable skills, so there are other engineering challenges out there that might excite you. I agree with Henning that working for huge corporations is draining and frustrating for A-type, perfectionistic people. You can't use your creativity no matter how hard you try, and believe me, they rarely change to suit you. Took me a long time to figure that one out.

My question to you is, "What would you do if you came home today to read an email from your office saying you'd just been down-sized; the check's in the mail."? Allow yourself to think through just what you would do - the wrenching decision of quiting and giving up your security in that scenario is a moot point and so you could then feel free to think past having to make that decision.

So kid, what would you do?

Best of luck to you.

paladin
04-16-2008, 06:36 PM
Find a nice quiet place, far away from everyone....a park maybe...take Chauncy and read "The Prophet".....or the works of Omar Khayamm..

Katherine
04-16-2008, 07:40 PM
Chancie died last October:(, but Monty and I go for walks everyday.:)

Paul Pless
04-16-2008, 07:50 PM
.....or the works of Omar Khayamm..some of my favorite verse comes from that ode to wine:)


The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,
Moves on; nor all your Piety nor Wit
Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,
Nor all your Tears wash out a Word of it.

paladin
04-16-2008, 07:51 PM
sorry...I meant Monty Lord Mountbatten er whatever his moniker izzz...

paladin
04-16-2008, 07:54 PM
Paul, there are at least a dozen translations of those works......and you might be surprised at the subtle differences in the meanings of the words and the lines with just a slight emphasis with the given translator...I have one set of translations that compares the four most popular translated versions...it is quite interesting to read them side by side......not bad for a poor tentmaker...

LeeG
04-16-2008, 09:01 PM
5'-9" is tall for a woman. Gayle is 5'-10", and I'm into that.

Sorry to hear your headroom is only 5'-9" inches, Paladin! I'm 6'-1" and Balckbird is one of my all-time favorite designs, though I'd want to stretch one of my own a bit, too.

Seriously, it would appear you've done a fine job of drawing a larger rendition.

Moby Nick

what!! my gf is Gayle and I'm pretty sure she's on the high side of 5'10...is your Gayle about 37?

Katherine
04-16-2008, 09:19 PM
I'm facing making some pretty big changes in my life. It's terrifying and exciting at the same time. There's always that pesky fear of failure.

CGrant
04-16-2008, 09:28 PM
That fear is over-rated. Really.

Katherine
04-16-2008, 09:36 PM
I don't do poverty well.:p

erster
04-16-2008, 09:37 PM
I'm facing making some pretty big changes in my life. It's terrifying and exciting at the same time. There's always that pesky fear of failure.
There are no guarantees in life. Tommorrow is not even guaranteed. The expression that fits this is "The best-laid plans of mice and men". Failures almost always open doors too. I wish you the best, and also plan for the best, or the glass is always half full!

LeeG
04-16-2008, 10:52 PM
oh,,XTC,,,it'll help melt some fears. Clinically of course.

Katherine, you've been mighty vague for such an important topic, not that I suggest you open your heart out on a semi anonymous forum with a peanut gallery nature. I hope there's a place where you have discussed specifics.

Katherine
04-17-2008, 07:03 AM
Don't worry Lee. I figure I've said enough.

Tylerdurden
04-17-2008, 07:26 AM
I don't do poverty well.:p

All the more reason to learn how to deal with it.

Its ten times harder when poverty is forced on one and they have no clue how to deal with it.

Rigadog
04-17-2008, 07:36 AM
Don't think too long about it, life goes by pretty quick. And there may be nothing you can do about it; all of this self-determination business may be illusion. To quote Captain Ahab, "By heaven, man, we are turned round and round in this world like yonder windlass, and Fate is the handspike. And all the time, lo! that smiling sky, and this unsounded sea." (it helps when you read it to hear Gregory Peck's voice in your head) *


* I can't believe you all lost interest in my Moby Dick thread so soon. So I am now forced to sprinkle Melville's pearls wherever...

For those who haven't the intestinal fortitude for digesting the whole book, I suggest that you read chapter 132, "The Symphony" .

"Aye, toil we how we may, we all sleep at last on the field."

Popeye
04-17-2008, 07:43 AM
ten years from now , saddled with a mortgage , a brood of youngsters and your butt measures 6 axe handles across the beam , you might reflect on this time

LeeG
04-17-2008, 08:09 AM
Don't worry Lee. I figure I've said enough.


I hope enough gets you what you want/need.

Katherine
04-17-2008, 08:10 PM
I sit here reading the day's topics in the Bilge. I can't help but wonder why so many members are always so negative. How incredibly sad.:( I have much to be grateful for and am trying to remember that when things get to me.

The Bigfella
04-17-2008, 08:27 PM
Keep smiling kiddo!

paladin
04-17-2008, 08:27 PM
am I negative?...Have I ever been negative? Go do something while you can enjoy it, not wait until you're old and grey and cranky and sit around saying "I coulda dunn that if only......"

Tabitha ( Gaff rig girl )
04-17-2008, 08:41 PM
I've had my own fair share of feeling fed up with my life. There have been many times when I just wanted to throw my hands up in the air and quit. Or those times I just get bored with my life...that's usually when I'm not challenging myself enough.

I think it depends alot on your "attitude" towards your life and how you deal with things. I consider myself a very spiritual person and that has helped me get through many rough times. Sometimes I feel like I can't handle everything that's thrown at me or I try to carry my problems and everyone elses too.

I just think about WHAT makes me happy...and do it. Of course not all things in life are that easy, unfortunately. My life is not only MY life...it belongs to my children too. So, keeping them happy and healthy are priority #1 and I usually fall right into their happiness ;). God knows I can't have everything in life the way I want it to be, but I've learned to make the best of what I've got...good luck to you my friend.

CGrant
04-17-2008, 08:46 PM
I don't do poverty well.:p

Me either!

Katherine
04-17-2008, 08:53 PM
Chuck, you have good reason to be negative but are one of the most positive, kind, and generous people I have ever met.:)

Tabitha, I'm trying to maintain a similar attitude. Our significant others should thank their lucky stars we share their love of the water and wooden boats.;):D

To the rest of you wise guys, many thanks.:p

paladin
04-17-2008, 09:38 PM
Wait a few days after the 30th......I should have my eyes open and my body will hurt like hell, but come on down....I'll check you into a local motel......I'll wake you up before brunch, take ya around to all the 2 bit boat operations around here, maybe meet some people, I'll feed ya good sea food, and some fine entertainment if the mommas and poppas some of those folks are playing......and maybe you want to meet some folks for a change of pace job.....cuzzactly what is your degree in or what do you do.......there's gotta be some aspect of the spook business where you would fit............

Tabitha ( Gaff rig girl )
04-17-2008, 09:49 PM
Chuck, you have good reason to be negative but are one of the most positive, kind, and generous people I have ever met.:)

Tabitha, I'm trying to maintain a similar attitude. Our significant others should thank their lucky stars we share their love of the water and wooden boats.;):D

To the rest of you wise guys, many thanks.:p

There's nothing in the world better than sailing with the one you love...it's a wonderful feeling ;):)

Mrleft8
04-17-2008, 09:54 PM
I wanna be a life guard.

LeeG
04-17-2008, 10:06 PM
I wanna be an otter, but right now i wanna take a shower,,so I that's what I'll do.

Syed
04-18-2008, 12:20 AM
Quit 'The Bilge' WBF. :cool:

The Bigfella
04-18-2008, 12:23 AM
Quit 'The Bilge' WBF. :cool:


Hey!

We like having her around here!

Tanbark Spanker
04-18-2008, 12:31 AM
...look in wonderment at the mystery and magic of life. And, love every moment, while I patiently wonder what could possibly happen next.

Syed
04-18-2008, 04:26 AM
Hey!

We like having her around here!
Me too. :)

Paul Pless
04-18-2008, 05:56 AM
Hey!

We like having her around here!

and me too:):)

Katherine
04-18-2008, 08:12 PM
Chuck,

Thank You, but I might not be all that useful to them. I talk to much. :D

Bill Griffin
04-18-2008, 08:55 PM
Go sailing in the Canary Islands for a week. Fly to Hawaii and cycle around Maui and coast down Haleakala. Drive south. Go see Chucks friends, spookin can be fun!

Bob Cleek
04-18-2008, 09:20 PM
I've found I can avoid such existential questions by regularly blaming my problems on somebody else.

Paul Pless
04-18-2008, 09:28 PM
I've found I can avoid such existential questions by regularly blaming my problems on somebody else.Dude, you're a divorce attorney, you've heard quite enough of this over the years, eh?

Mrleft8
04-18-2008, 09:31 PM
Hey!

We like having her around here! She does smell kinda nice.... And she's taller than half the guys here, so I can usually see her in a crowded polo field....

LeeG
04-18-2008, 09:35 PM
whew,,that's a lot to read between the lines. I'm with Matt,,hey Matt, what's your ride? I've been buzzing around on Bike Friday 20" folder with fat street tires,,insane grip in turns with low cg and fat tires.

Rigadog
04-19-2008, 07:08 AM
If I had my way
I would move to another lifetime
I'd quit my job
Ride the train through the misty night time

I'd be ready when my feet touched down
Wherever I come down

And if the folks would have me then they'd have me

-- Steely Dan

Tylerdurden
04-19-2008, 08:37 AM
I sit here reading the day's topics in the Bilge. I can't help but wonder why so many members are always so negative. How incredibly sad.:( I have much to be grateful for and am trying to remember that when things get to me.

Its not negative, its a warning. Failure to accept a storm is approaching is more negative than letting others know time to head for higher ground.

Besides the reason things are so negative is because of people who just ignore it hoping it will go away. All it takes for evil to prevail is for good men to do nothing. You get what you pay for.

Katherine
04-19-2008, 08:58 AM
Its not negative, its a warning. Failure to accept a storm is approaching is more negative than letting others know time to head for higher ground.

Besides the reason things are so negative is because of people who just ignore it hoping it will go away. All it takes for evil to prevail is for good men to do nothing. You get what you pay for.Man, did you miss the point.:rolleyes: Stick to muddying up your own threads.

Tylerdurden
04-19-2008, 09:10 AM
Man, did you miss the point.:rolleyes: Stick to muddying up your own threads.

Listen Missy, you have a habit of pooping in the parlor yourself.
If you don't want to deal with the street people stay out of Times Square.

Katherine
04-19-2008, 09:17 AM
Listen Missy, you have a habit of pooping in the parlor yourself.
If you don't want to deal with the street people stay out of Times Square.Strange, I generally don't say anything on your threads.

Tylerdurden
04-19-2008, 02:10 PM
Strange, I generally don't say anything on your threads.

And your never bringing my name up others either:p

Have you got a case of Joe memory happening?
Bet you deodorants contain Aluminum and you have fluoride in your water:D

Paul Pless
04-19-2008, 02:21 PM
And your never bringing my name up others either:p

Have you got a case of Joe memory happening?
Bet you deodorants contain Aluminum and you have fluoride in your water:DMark, you're overdue for a visit to the 'spelling' thread.;)

Paul Girouard
04-19-2008, 02:26 PM
Mark, you're overdue for a visit to the 'spelling' thread.;)



And the "fill in all the words" thread as well. Instead of just "thinking" you've inserted all the words you've thought you had put in. Fast typing is a bitch eh!

Per this line , "And your never bringing my name up ( insert right word for true meaning here) others either:p" post # 191 this thread. :D At least that's where I'd put maybe a "on" or " in" , I'd maybe add the word "thread" in between other and either , might even throw in a comma , what ya think?


I do that one as well , think the word , re read the post and STILL miss the key word or words :o

I did get the drift of Mark's post and liked the stay out of times square / poopin in the parlor angle , it had merit:D/ was funny IMO, YMMV, Use no hooks, warranty void where prohibited by law , etc etc !:D

Tylerdurden
04-19-2008, 05:53 PM
Mark, you're overdue for a visit to the 'spelling' thread.;)


Too funny.:D

Memphis Mike
04-19-2008, 06:11 PM
"ten years from now , saddled with a mortgage , a brood of youngsters and your butt measures 6 axe handles across the beam , you might reflect on this time."

What Poopeye said is true, Kate. Right now you have it made. You wait till you get married and have that first child. Your life will change forever then.

And one other thing because I've lived long enough to know. Material things don't mean a thing. Boats, Cars, TV sets....... whatever. None of it will bring you true happiness.

For the answer, go back and read what Tabitha said. She knows.

Tylerdurden
04-19-2008, 06:13 PM
Married? I did that once, it was highly overrated.:rolleyes:

Katherine
04-19-2008, 07:44 PM
"ten years from now , saddled with a mortgage , a brood of youngsters and your butt measures 6 axe handles across the beam , you might reflect on this time."

What Poopeye said is true, Kate. Right now you have it made. You wait till you get married and have that first child. Your life will change forever then.

And one other thing because I've lived long enough to know. Material things don't mean a thing. Boats, Cars, TV sets....... whatever. None of it will bring you true happiness.

For the answer, go back and read what Tabitha said. She knows.Trust me, the last thing I want is more "stuff.":rolleyes:

Paul Pless
04-19-2008, 07:46 PM
Trust me, the last thing I want is more "stuff.":rolleyes:ehh?

Katherine
04-19-2008, 07:48 PM
ehh?You of all people. . .

Hwyl
04-19-2008, 07:51 PM
ten years from now , saddled with a mortgage , a brood of youngsters and your butt measures 6 axe handles across the beam , you might reflect on this time

I'm still gobsmacked that popeye got away with this.

Don't worry, they use short axe handles in Nova Scotia.

S/V Laura Ellen
04-19-2008, 07:53 PM
I'm still gobsmacked that popeye got away with this.

Don't worry, they use short axe handles in Nova Scotia.


That would be Newfoundland!

Katherine
04-19-2008, 07:58 PM
I'm actually quite fond of Nova Scotia.

Rigadog
04-20-2008, 06:30 AM
Could Brian Wilson have the answer?

Do you wanna go
Straight to hawaii
(hawaii) hawaii (hawaii)
Straight to hawaii (hawaii, hawaii)
Oh do (honolulu, waikiki) you wanna come along with me
(do you wanna come along with me)

I heard about all the pretty girls
With their grass skirts down to their knees
All my life I wanted to see
The island called hawaii

Go to hawaii
(hawaii) hawaii (hawaii)
Straight to hawaii (hawaii, hawaii)
Oh do (honolulu, waikiki) you wanna come along with me
(do you wanna come along with me)

Now I don't know what town you're from
But don't tell me that they got bigger waves
Cause everyone that goes
Comes back with nothing but raves

Thats in hawaii
(hawaii) hawaii (hawaii)
Thats in hawaii (hawaii, hawaii)
Oh do (honolulu, waikiki) you wanna come along with me
(do you wanna come along with me)

And pretty soon this winter
They'll hold the surfing championship of the year
Surfer guys and girls
Will be coming from far and near

Go to hawaii
(hawaii) hawaii (hawaii)
Go to hawaii (hawaii, hawaii)
Oh do (honolulu, waikiki) you wanna come along with me
(do you wanna come along with me)

And you now (honolulu, waikiki)
You wanna live hanah lee
(do you wanna come along with me)
Ooo ooo ooo (honolulu, waikiki)
Ooo ooo ooo (do you wanna come along with me)
Ooo ooo ooo (honolulu, waikiki)
Ooo ooo ooo (do you wanna come along with me)
Ooo ooooo (honolulu, waikiki)

Rigadog
04-20-2008, 06:41 AM
We were talking-about the space between us all
And the people-who hide themselves behind a wall of illusion
Never glimpse the truth-then it's far too late-when they pass away.
We were talking-about the love we all could share-when we find it
To try our best to hold it there-with our love
With our love-we could save the world-if they only knew.
Try to realize it's all within yourself
No-one else can make you change
And to see you're really only very small,
And life flows ON within you and without you.
We were talking-about the love that's gone so cold and the people,
Who gain the world and lose their soul-
They don't know-they can't see-are you one of them?
When you've seen beyond yourself-then you may find, peace of mind,
Is waiting there-
And the time will come when you see
we're all one, and life flows on within you and without you.

George Harrison

Tabitha ( Gaff rig girl )
04-20-2008, 10:30 AM
Married? I did that once, it was highly overrated.:rolleyes:

I was married to a man for 9 years...with him for 11. Marriage wasn't overrated in my opinion...it was that HIS opinion of OUR marriage was UNDERRATED!!!! After a while it didn't mean anything to him anymore...he found hotter, younger women to mess up.

I used to say "I'll never get married again", but now that all that past damage has healed my opinion is starting to change. If you find the right one...you know someone who wants the same things, someone who can respect your feelings and needs (and vise versa), someone you have an intimate connection with, someone that literally makes you say "WOW". Well, you get what I'm saying.

I'd much rather face the world hand in hand with my soulmate than empty handed ;)

Joe (SoCal)
04-20-2008, 11:00 AM
Well since I just signed my papers I'm not so sure I'm about to climb back up to the altar just yet ;)

I gave it 11 years myself and being Irish if she didn't call it quits I would have stayed in it till the bitter end, no one knows how to suffer like the irish.

But if you do find The One hold onto it what ever way possible.

As for being fed up with life Im seriously getting to that point. I'm at a place now where I feel both the freedom I've never felt before and all the pressure of things around me and restrictions that I hate. I've made a decision that will change my life and put me back on MY TERMS, the next commission I'm buying a sailboat that two adults and 3 kids can cruise comfortably on and one single guy can live-aboard. I will keep local for Tess. But I'm tired of not living my life and my dreams.

Tabitha ( Gaff rig girl )
04-20-2008, 11:07 AM
don't forget Lucky Dog :eek:

Joe (SoCal)
04-20-2008, 11:18 AM
don't forget Lucky Dog :eek:

Lucky's good on a boat, he goes where I go ;)

L.W. Baxter
04-20-2008, 12:01 PM
Katherine, I will take a contrary position. Being single, footloose, and fancy free isn't all it's cracked up to be. And yes, I had my reckless time between college and marriage with none but the cockroaches to witness my "freedom". Now I'm settled into a mundane life in the burbs, and I can't find anything wrong with it, from any angle. I take my adventures as a family unit these days, and the action is tamer, but the rewards are greater. Getting married and settling down is not a prison sentence; on the contrary, it is the best way to fill your life with love and partnership. Having a captive audience for your affections is a time-tested, and biologically correct, method for fulfillment. You give and you get, that's how it works. Ten years from now, if you've got a loving husband and a kid or two, it won't matter how wide your bottom is, trust me.

I think there is an over-emphasis on personal fantasies in our society. The conventional wisdom seems to be that, if you don't "follow your dreams", you will be incomplete as a person. But the real world has shown me plenty of people who put their individual dreams above commitment to others, who end up alienated and alone, wanting to have long conversations with strangers in which they go on an on about how effed-up the world is. If all you do is take from the world, eventually it dries up, and turns into a wasteland before your eyes.

If you cultivate lifelong commitments to other people, the world will grow richer as your capacity to appreciate it grows. Your dreams will adjust to your real, adult priorities, with no reason to regret the things you didn't do.

LeeG
04-20-2008, 12:24 PM
she's having a mid-life crisis,,,it'll pass

Tabitha ( Gaff rig girl )
04-20-2008, 01:36 PM
Well said L.W. Baxter :)

S B
04-20-2008, 10:44 PM
You are probably not fed up with your life, just the circumstance of living it.

skuthorp
04-20-2008, 10:53 PM
"You are probably not fed up with your life, just the circumstance of living it."
It's better than the alternative I'd say.

Phil Heffernan
04-20-2008, 11:37 PM
I think there is an over-emphasis on personal fantasies in our society. The conventional wisdom seems to be that, if you don't "follow your dreams", you will be incomplete as a person. But the real world has shown me plenty of people who put their individual dreams above commitment to others, who end up alienated and alone, wanting to have long conversations with strangers in which they go on an on about how effed-up the world is. If all you do is take from the world, eventually it dries up, and turns into a wasteland before your eyes.

If you cultivate lifelong commitments to other people, the world will grow richer as your capacity to appreciate it grows. Your dreams will adjust to your real, adult priorities, with no reason to regret the things you didn't do.

I agree that commitment to others is the path to true fulfillment. The self centered road is always a circle leading nowhere.

But you can give to others best, if you know what gifts you have to give...And that comes from knowing those things that are hard wired to your passionate core...

It's never simple, until it is...;o)

PH

katey
04-21-2008, 02:38 PM
Katherine, check your PMs.

Katherine
04-21-2008, 09:52 PM
Sharing your life is great, but some people have to be unreliable jerks no matter how many chances you give them.:rolleyes:

Tabitha ( Gaff rig girl )
04-21-2008, 11:00 PM
CHANCES???

I call em STRIKES :p

Strike 1.......Strike 2.......Strike 3..........YOU'RE OUTTA HERE!!

Maybe if I would have used this theory with my ex husband, I would have WON the ball game :rolleyes:

LeeG
04-21-2008, 11:30 PM
Sharing your life is great, but some people have to be unreliable jerks no matter how many chances you give them.:rolleyes:


sounds like half a conversation to me. Time to wrap this one up.

glenallen
04-21-2008, 11:36 PM
"unreliable jerks"

You rang?
Hey, it ain't all that easy to be unreliable consistently, is it Paul, er, I mean....Fred!

Kaa
04-22-2008, 01:09 AM
Maybe if I would have used this theory with my ex husband, I would have WON the ball game :rolleyes:

Heh. What constitutes winning?

Kaa

Katherine
04-22-2008, 01:30 AM
Sorry just venting. For the record, I have other people in my life besides Paul.