View Full Version : An interesting take on Hillary

02-15-2008, 10:06 AM
Sent to me by a friend, I don't know the author.

You'll be happy to know that Hillary Rodham is still vowing to go after the greedy corporate interests (http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0208/8525.html) in industries such as oil, credit card, insurance, pharmaceutical, investment, and loan firms.
Hillary knows the research. She fully understands that her supporters are among the most ignorant and undereducated in our country. So ... when she's in trouble, why not pander to her core support? The American Dumb Mass Coalition!
Here's how she plans to rein in each and every one of these industries? Are you ready to enter the mind of a socialist? Just for grins, I'll channel Hillary at the end of every item so you can see what she is really thinking.

—"We'll take on the oil companies and harness their record profits to create millions of clean energy jobs – high-wage jobs you can raise a family on. I'll end their special tax breaks and give them a choice: invest some of your profits in alternative energy, or we'll do it for you. People have been paying through the roof at the pump, and it's time the companies paid their fair share."
Yeah ... the morons will buy that one. They wouldn't know a profit from a profit margin if their lives depended on it. They're upset with the price of gas, so the oil companies are easy to demonize. Besides ... everyone knows it's the job of the government to tell businesses what to do with their profits. I'm sure the teachers, policemen and firemen's retirement funds won't miss the money.

—"We'll take on the credit card companies so that you and your families aren't drowning in debt. Here in Ohio, payday lenders are actually taking Social Security checks from our elderly. That's outrageous. I've proposed real consumer protections against abusive interest rates – capping them at no more than 30 percent and working to get them far lower. And I'll ban those hidden fees and sudden rate hikes, because credit card companies shouldn't be able to bait and switch you and your family."
Well blame this on the credit card companies. These idiots will buy that one too. It was the evil credit card companies that forced these people to go out there and spend and spend and charge and charge for lifestyle. After all, the people who pay off their cards every month aren't likely to vote for me anyway. As for those payday lenders ... they simply cannot be allowed to create a product to meet a demand. What do they think this is, a country based on economic liberty? I'll demonize the pants off those jerks. Votes votes votes!

—"We'll take on the insurance companies and tell them they can no longer discriminate against the sickest people who need care the most. They spend more than $50 billion a year trying to figure out how not to cover people. Well, I'm going to save them a fortune and a whole lot of time, because here's the new policy: No more discrimination period. So even if you have a pre-existing condition, you can get the health insurance you need – no questions asked."
People hate insurance companies too. We'll make insurance companies pay off on the most absurd claims .. and we're going to allow people to smoke and eat their way into ill health and them we'll make an insurance company insure them. Yeah, I know. This will drive the cost of insurance through the roof ... but that's not a bad thing. It will just cause people to become louder in their demands for government health care.

—"And I'll go after drug companies and insurance companies that are overcharging consumers and the government – it's time to end their profiteering at our expense.
Yes, by God, no more profiteering! In Hillary's America evil corporations will only be allowed to make profits on things that people don't actually need. I'm a socialist! What did you expect! Somehow I need to figure out how to hide the fact that cosmetics companies make higher profits than drug companies ... thanks in no small part to me. We also have to stop these Wal-Marts and Krogers from setting up pharmacies and selling generic drugs at four bucks a pop. Not good for my plans for big government.

—"We'll take on Wall Street and tell them: you're going to finally pay your fair share in taxes. Because it's outrageous that a teacher making $50,000 pays a higher tax rate than some Wall Street investment managers making $50 million. And I'll create a bi-partisan Corporate Waste Commission to review all those corporate subsidies – and propose a comprehensive way to end them. We can save billions of dollars a year and put it to work for you.
That's the Warren Buffet line .. and it works. Those talk show hosts are going to remind people that the reason investors pay a higher tax rate than teachers is because teachers are paying income taxes and investors are paying capital gains taxes. Two different taxes, two different rates. I'll be sure to not tell these idiot voters that investors pay the same rates as everyone else on their earned income. No sense confusing my voters with the facts.

—"We'll take on the student loan companies and tell them no more ripping off our sons and daughters. I'm proposing a Student Borrower Bill of Rights - no more deceptive advertising and outrageous fees. And we'll end the inefficient subsidies for private student loan companies. Because we should be making it easier for our kids to go to college – not harder."
Actually ... I'm not sure just how many more college educated people we need in this country. After all, the more educated someone becomes the less likely they are to believe my bull****. And how dare these loan companies charge market rates for student loans anyway?
Hillary, my friends, is in panic mode. Lord knows what other wonderful promises she's going to come up with in the next days ... and what new attacks she's going to launch on the free markets.

02-16-2008, 06:54 AM
Aint no free market.

Ian McColgin
02-16-2008, 08:07 AM
Slobber. If this is the best "analysis" the right can muster and if Hillary is the Democratic candidate, she'll win in a walk.

Nicholas Scheuer
02-16-2008, 08:22 AM
Twice I've seen and heard the TV news report on Hillary where she says something like "high-sounding words and inspiring rhetoric" won't cut it, we need "action".

She does not, however, expound on what "action" she would take, so we're left with nothing but her carping on her opponent's "inspirational rhetoric".

Pretty lame.

I like the pundit's observation I heard several weeks ago, "Hillary always sounds like the fifth grade teacher we never liked".

Moby Nick

02-16-2008, 08:30 AM

02-16-2008, 08:41 AM
Hillary is a socialist too?

Nicholas Scheuer
02-16-2008, 08:45 AM
Have a little mercy, George, the guy can hardy lift his arms.

But then, when it comes to "raw power", if you have the President by the balls, you don't even have to lift a finger.

Moby Nick