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paladin
02-12-2008, 10:22 PM
Q: Name the four seasons.



A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.



Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.



A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.



Q: How is dew formed?



A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.



Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? (brilliant, love this!)



A: Keep it in the cow.



Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?



A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.



Q: What are steroids?



A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.



Q: What happens to your body as you age?



A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.



Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?



A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.



Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.



A: Premature death.



Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? ( e.g., abdomen)



A: The body is consisted into three parts -- the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels A, E, I, O, and U.



Q: What is the fibula?



A: A small lie.



Q: What does 'varicose' mean? (I do love this one...)



A: Nearby.



Q: Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarian Section.'



A: The Caesarian Section is a district in Rome



Q: What does the word 'benign' mean?'



A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

skuthorp
02-12-2008, 10:36 PM
Ah yes, the Cesarian section, rents are too high now, but in the old days...................

P.I. Stazzer-Newt
02-13-2008, 12:50 AM
Days are longer in summer because they expand in the heat.