View Full Version : "Life is what happens while you're making other plans..."

Phillip Allen
07-14-2006, 11:50 AM
Hell is trying to instill lost, fleeting, flying moments into the adults wherein exists your lost children.

Divorced…an old story these days. The wife wanted a different man in the house and I got kicked out long ago now. I ran across this and thought it might be of interest to others…I wrote it last year.

Today I showed my six year old granddaughter how to mark a radius cut on a boat rudder. She watched then went back to petting the cat, apparently not interested…but she heard and will remember the point years from now. “My grandfather showed me how to do things to wood and make it turn into a boat”…that IS the point. It was not important that she remember how to scale a radius, it was/is important that she remember Grandfather showing her things…perhaps even wonderful things. Those moments are lost for us with my children and I don’t think they even know it…but I do. I know it again each time I have such a moment with a grandchild…sweet misery I would not pass the chance to repeat again and again. I believe values, life training, manners and a myriad other things are given to a child in little bits and pieces…a moment here and there…in the watching of wood shavings fall from the bench. Each shaving is a precious moment in a child’s rearing to be carried in remembrances later. They are to be brought out at odd moments or even subconsciously. They are seeds in the vessel that is your child…the vessel that becomes an adult to carry on the training with his own children and they, in turn, with their children. I desperately want to pass on those seeds of thought I received from my grandmothers and from my mother and father…it is of such importance that it cannot be trusted to others.

07-14-2006, 01:06 PM
I know of what you say Phil,I have been there.It redefines your place in the world,where you have to find a way to still be a father and then a way to be a grandfather,no matter what.I never found that way ,not like I wanted to,too many roadblocks in the way(read that an ex that was simply evil).I hope your journey goes easier then mine did.

07-14-2006, 01:24 PM
Very inspiring to me.

Precious moments indeed.

I try to enjoy them whenever possible ...

Perhaps a bit off color, but my son said to me yesterday: "Look Dad! I have balls." (surely that couldn't be what he said ... I thought).

"Really, son? Where?"

"Right he under my wiener ... do you have balls, dad?"

"Si nino, I sure do."

The pure innocence of the exchange will never be forgotten ... not by me at least. :)

Bill R
07-14-2006, 01:51 PM
I am just beginning to realize that. My wife is studying for 10 weeks in Moscow, Russia this summer. That has left me as "Mr. Mom" to Bonnie and Clyde reincarnated, our 3 1/2 year old twins.

It has been a real eye opener watching them grow and change, even in the relatively short time it has been just the 3 of us. Their innocence has been a real eye opener- the fascination of grasshoppers, seeing their first snake, and trying to make sense of the surrounding world using only their 3 year old experiences as a basis.

This has been a time I will always remember. The have taught me it is the little things that make life good- not the house, job, car, whatever, but the grasshoppers, flowers, etc.