View Full Version : 1st time builders haiku

bob goeckel
04-29-2003, 12:46 PM
measure mark cut
measure mark cut
measure mark cut
measure measure mark cut
measure measure mark cut
measure measure mark cut

04-29-2003, 01:49 PM
Darn- still too short! tongue.gif (You laugh, but I've done this- must have been lost in a not quite parallel parallel universe... redface.gif )

04-29-2003, 02:22 PM
I've moved on to:

measure measure mark check specs measure cut

And I'm always amazed at how many times I put the mark in the wrong place.

I guess when I stop being amazed, I'll be good.

Carl Simmons
04-29-2003, 02:47 PM
How about this:

Measure mark then cut
Check fit, Oh Crap! Get next board
Measure twice, mark cut


04-29-2003, 04:10 PM
If it's expensive wood,
Measure thrice,
Mark twice,
Sit in chair for a while,
Then cut.

P.S.: Too long? OK.
Too short? Go buy a wood stretcher.

[ 04-29-2003, 05:14 PM: Message edited by: Bayboat ]

04-29-2003, 04:36 PM
Measure, Mark, Cut....... (adjust plans to fit board.....)

dale o
04-29-2003, 05:17 PM
Slowly, the master builder
Measures, Marks, Measures;
Then cuts.

dale o
04-29-2003, 05:28 PM
Man who measure once and cut,
Wear deep path to lumberyard.

04-29-2003, 05:29 PM
Anyone else remember the Candid Camera carpenter episode, back in the Alan Funt days? They hire a series of fellowz to fit shelves into a pair of uprights. Thing was, they were able to move the uprights. Woodbutchers having a bad day really can be pretty humorous.

04-29-2003, 06:54 PM
Okay, I'm new to boats - still waiting for the plans, but the aeromodelling equivalent is:

measure, mark, check plan, measure, worry, measure, cut, swear, reach for new timber, find you've run out, use wrong timber, measure, cut, damn the fit glue will fill the gap.

Depending on how well you do this, the dogs run for their lives somewhere between worry and swear.


bob goeckel
04-30-2003, 08:21 AM
i think the best lesson for the amateur is learning to hide the mistakes you're willing to live with. :eek:

Hans Lassen
04-30-2003, 12:22 PM
Plans in the mail. Happiness, confusion; study, study, study, rapidly advancing into isolation. Irritation ("Remember me? We're married, and this is your son!") Eureka. This is how it might work... Wait for weekend. Shut yourself off from the world. Tea, tobacco, favourite music station.
Measure. Measure. Draw line. Bliss: "I'm actually going to build a real boat."
Prepare tools.
Remember old-timer's advice: measure again: "three times cut off, and still too short" :rolleyes: .
Connect lines with flexible batten.
23 5/8ths inches is NOT 23,5 inches :D
measure again
don't tell anyone for five years...
May our gracious host AND THIS FORUM stay healthy and online for many years to come!

04-30-2003, 03:46 PM
More plank butts are joined with half-inch putty than any boatbuilder dreamed of in his philosophy.
Or, tight butts are what dreams are made of.

bob goeckel
05-01-2003, 10:51 AM
tight butts are what dreams are made of. your lips to gods ear! ;)

05-02-2003, 07:44 PM
maybe you dont know
haiku's have five then seven
sylables only

damn, that one sucked.

Plan and scheme and dream.
Figgure how much time it takes,
then just double that

It will cost this much.
I already know it all...
No, I can still learn.

I've got no money.
My friends think I've gone crazy.
My boats almost done. =)

-- James

05-02-2003, 07:47 PM
nevermind, I just got it. I'm sharp as a marble today.

-- James :rolleyes:

bob goeckel
05-02-2003, 11:26 PM
you say ha Iku
i say hAI ku
you say tOmato
i tomAto

05-03-2003, 01:01 PM
oops oops oop oop oops
oop oops oops oop oop oops oop
oops oop oop oops oops
oops oop oop oops oops oops #$#$&%$!!