Dingoisms

[George Jung]

I've decided I must add WD to my 'ignore' list; his style of speech (give me a little leeway, okay?) is having a... shall we say disruptive influence on my life? I'm becoming masteroftherunonsentence, in writing and in speech; others have noticed a bit of agitation, some so bold as to suggest lunacy, in my walkabouts at work. All that is livable, and I like to think loveable; but SWMBO has been less impressed. When I mentioned I thought the 'hoons needed to attend to their studies a bit more, the look she delivered suggested she thought I was tetched. My suggestion that I needed a Wee Lassie was similarly not well received. The final straw was when I inadvertently called her 'Possumpoop', meant entirely as a term of endearment.

Thankfully I've learned a bit about construction, insulation, waterproofing etc. from my constant attention to the WBF. My doghouse (where I'm currently ensconced) is 4-season ready, has cabletv, and a cablemodem next to the hot-tub. I've a laptop (though sadly not an Apple - sorry, Joe) and feel I can weather this storm. I'm signed up for 'rehabilitation (I'm going to spend some time talking only to a bunch of Iowegians) and hope that, having added ol' Shane to my list, there is hope for recovery and a permanent cure. :D

[Phillip Allen]

Okay, everyone talk like an Aussie week starts today...sep AH cain do-it :D

[WX]

Well all I can say is avagoodweekend and if the mozzies are out make sure you have the aeroguard handy.
;)

[Willin']

I'll wager that when the sage of the Penobscot valley reads this he'll infer that there's something Jungian afoot! :D

[Wild Wassa]

GJ, I see your problem Skipper. When a Sandgroper's language doesn't even translate to the eastern states over here, it is totally understandable that novice 'New Australians' like yourself, will stuff-up badly ... and end up in more than just the dog house.

In the eastern states (over here) a possumpoop is just that and a hoon is a yobbo in a hot car ... so I can see the problems that a novice 'ratbag' like yourself will have ... being so far away from the source.

The Australian 'ratbag' tradition is to take a word and perversely use it as the opposite of its intended meaning, that will impress the sheilas, no worries ... and used in a silken tongued way. That will help you make up with your good lady and put things right.

If your good lady is tall? ... call her shorty. If she is a redhead, call her bluey ... but if she is gorgeous don't call her ugly. Some rules are inconsistant so be very careful.

If you want to speak like an Australian just be direct ... sheilas really love that, no worries.

I have faith that you can become a cunning linguist.

[ 08-30-2005, 03:29 AM: Message edited by: Wild Wassa ]

[George Jung]

Strewth, I was working on a rejoinder, but after this, I'm ... gobsmacked! :D

[Phillip Allen]

I rejoinder once but we broke up again

[Wild Wassa]

GJ, you're welcome Skipper.

Here is one example of how we speak to each other using the 'ratbag' technique.

Me: "This is a good ridge, no rubbish (thick scrub) for a change, easy going."
Voice 1: (with disdain) "No it isn't."
Voice 2: (mockingly) "This gully is bloody terrible, I've not seen rubbish like it."
Voice 3: (suppressing laughter) "I can't wait until we climb out of this bloody creek, I'm bloody-well freezing."

... and so the conversation goes on.

I hope this example helps ... and we were on a ridge.

This is a creek ... the bloody water is bloody cold. Using the word 'bloody', is the correct way to describe anything over here, that's worth looking at or worth doing. Use both the 'B' words often and you'll be considered Okker and blend-in bloody well ... no bullship.

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid183/pd0173ca0365e6b210d2e405264f2c599/f29ee108.jpg

Warren.

[ 08-30-2005, 12:50 AM: Message edited by: Wild Wassa ]

[George Jung]

..You are one bloody funny bloke, Warren...
There, how's that? :D
Beautiful (bloody) picture, btw..

[ 08-27-2005, 10:44 PM: Message edited by: George Jung ]

[George Jung]

I can't help but notice.... 'talk like an Aussie week" seems to be a bust. I've tried, but my eyes cross, I get a headache, and my tongue gets twisted. Must be part of that 'linguist' program yer talking about... :D

[Phillip Allen]

Ah well...I couldn't do it either...not enough brawls and I still have too many teeth...(But I did occupy the same air space with an Aussie once) :D

[George Jung]

I'm half afraid to ask... is that a euphemism? :D

[Phillip Allen]

Who...me? If it is my post you inquire about...When I was in the navy I learned that the Brits and Aussies never figured they had a good time if they didn't at least get a tooth loosened. The ones I met would fight a buzz saw and give it three revolutions head start.

[George Jung]

Sounds daunting. My dad tells me stories about his Navy days (circa WWII); similar stories; must be the culture, eh?

[Wild Dingo]

Well... since ol George has me on his ignore list :( ... which truely is a shame and disheartening... still no worries tongue.gif

Now about me lingo gymnastics... tis rather easy to be like an Aussie... notice I did say "be LIKE" an Aussie cause yous buggars got as much chance as a bungarra has of matin with a roo of gettin it right... yer weird tis the reason nothin more or less but its okay we forgives yer... seriously its not yer flamin fault yer weird nope I put it down to that well known conundrum that Ken McClure defined many years ago... that of rightsideupitis vs upsidedownities just not compatatble the brain phartations are relocated in yous blokes to the right side of the mushy stuff in yer noggins so the corellation of the right mushy stuff with the left mushy stuff wierds you out to much... if you care to wander through the archives if theyre still there thers a major discours on the variations and agititations of the whole scientific expolations of rightsideitis when considered alongside the expolations and extapalations of the wonderous abilities and scientifically proven poweress of those blessed with upsidedownitis

No worries eh :D

now as for bein an Aussie unless you can
1) wear thongs shorts an t shirt every day
2) do the Aussie salute
3) drink copious amounts of phiss without chunderin
4) call a woman a sheila the wife the missus the kids hoonberrys and a spade a spade not a flamin bloody shovel
5) drive in utes
6) enjoy HOT summers and Christmas

Now yer gotta learn to talk like an Aussie... that was "LIKE" an Aussie cause you have to first take it for granted it just aint gonna happen that your gonna talk true blue Aussie... just a vague similarity to our brilliant accent and linguistic gymnastic abilities... but its okay mates yer will get over it... eventually

Soooo... first things first... stock up on the good oil a block will do... now drink half that block of phiss... good on yer son! :cool:

So now yer half blotto an feelin the ducks knuts about the world... grasp yer nose betwixt fordinger and tumb an start yarnin... this should give yer a nasal twang soundin voice... sorta... it doesnt? drink a few more of the good oil... an try again!

Okay got the twang arced up... righto! now talk like this... really REALLY roll all words together shortin those that yer needs to an cuttin the ones yer dont need...

"Owyergoinyermug"

Us Aussies bein the laid back types we are tend to get rather lazy with our words and just cut and slice that English lingo to our pleasin... so here are the MOST IMPORTANT two Aussieisms you can ever learn...

"Owyergoinyermug" translates to: "How you going you mug" this is an Aussie mates "good day"

"yershout" rather simple Aussie call heard in rubbettys the country over "your shout" translates to "your buy" that is your buy of the phiss... now that yershout has an implied threat of dire consequences if the reciever doesnt buy the next round of drinks! riots and major dissention has occured when some mongrel has not shouted in a round at the pub... so if yous blokes hear "Its yer shout yer drongo" best belly up to the bar and buy a round!!

Now when youve got those two... get them right first before movin on okay... if you dont yer have no chance in hell of bein even remotely "like" an Aussie and best give it up as a bad joke right now... okay if you have then have a couple more of the good oil to feel real good about yerself and try this one... bit of practice first okay then try it on the missus...

Missus... "Sweetums what would you like for lunch?"
you in yer best Aussie accent... "rollovahunyanletusontop" ;)

But its when yer want to swear that life gets interestin... could be a tad hard at this stage of yer edjoomakashun but still worth attemptin an good for practice

"gosuckadeaddogsdongayerflamindrongowakker"

Heres a few ol Aussieisms that everyone should know...

Fair dinkum? - true?
Rubbetty - pub - hotel
sheila - woman
trike - sheial with the hots for any bloke
shaggin wagon - panel van
stone the crows - surprise
ridgeydidge - true fact
point percy at the porceilen - have a whiz
chuck chunder - puke
galah - mad crazy

So have yer got it together yet?

Finally... George mate Im sorry yer feel yer gotta put me on yer ignore list and mate for that Ive only gots one thing to say to yer...

tongue.gif

Note here I did some serious editin there!! poor flamin numbats earoles goannas knuts an emus tits must be damned near red raw with what I said... but no worries! George mate dont be jeolous its not yer fault yer never gonna get to be as wonderously brilliant an sooooooooo flamin sexy as every Aussie mug! I reckon yer a good bloke... fer a septic tank that is :D

[John B]

could you repeat that, I didn't catch it all the first time.

[WX]

And if you or someone else is a bit thick (think Forest Gump), or maybe even insane then they could be said to be:
A sandwich short of a picnic.
or have
A kangaroo loose in the top paddock
or be
Sixpence short of a quid (bit out of date that one)
then again he might be said to be "not quite the full quid.
You could possibly get the accent by talking without moving the top lip.
Humour is usually dry and understated.

[Wild Dingo]

oh yes indeed thicker than two bricks indeed... madder than a gaggle of galahs in the cockys back paddock...

Aussieisms tis a grand affliction... no remedy available... no known cure... no cure wanted or needed either... Aussies the most larconic bunch of laise faire charectors on earth

Drink? we dont drink!! We scull!!! we havent drunk since guzzlin became the national pastime :D

We have this attitude called of all things tall poppy syndrome wherein we must as an Aussie thing tear down any success achieved the higher up the food chain one climbs the more they become targets of this great Aussie pastime... also known pastimes include rubbishin poms an yanks kiwis are also fair game but like close brothers its never taken seriously... we take the great Aussie pastime of takin the phiss very seriously and spend as much time as we can devising ways of takin the phiss outta all comers

Were a feisty mob pretty easy goin with a tendency to takin it easy an never rushin around... but give us one single solitary excuse a fly on the wall a cockroach race a mud crab wrestle and we'll loose all control!! A few kegs of the good oil will see many a gentle yarn turn into a ragin war... were a great an loyal mob but should you expect us to be in awe of you stand to when you pass then accept it aint gonna happen!! We know we know you all hate us cause we dont give a ****e! ooopss err cause were free??? damn!

See now yer got me goin here!!! damn yer eyes George! Now awhile back some here got their g strigs in a knot when me an a bunch of other Aussies refered to your pres as the pres or bushy and our pm as little johnny dipstick... a lack of respect for the position of your president and our prime minister... but to us fellas they qualify righteously for the above mentioned tall poppy sydrome an equally for the above mentioned past time of takin the phiss... and deserve not the least amount of respect available from our big toes...

Arguably the most important part of gainin yer Aussieness is to be able to laugh at yerself while takin the phiss outta some other mug

Cheers!!

And George?? heres anothery!! tongue.gif

[Wild Wassa]

Originally posted by Wild Dingo:
"Fair dinkum ..."

When I was arrested for collecting road kill (only because I wouldn't share it with the locals, I still maintain) I was haulled before the courts. I didn't get any of this, mambee-pambee prissy 'Law and Order' TV stuff like, "Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?"

Over here we are asked, "Do you swear to be dinkum, fair dinkum and nothing but dinkum?" ... my reply was, "Blood oath Sport."

I hope this helps.

Warren.

[ 08-29-2005, 09:19 PM: Message edited by: Wild Wassa ]

[George Jung]

I feel more eddycated already.
Now, about that roadkill.... Soup du' roo?

[Wild Wassa]

Originally posted by GJ:
"Now, about that roadkill ... ... ?"

George, ... proven but not charged.

I'm on a month's pre-holidays at the moment and I've been doing a bush-bash every day to get fit for my real holidays (not my normal style of Bush bashing, he is doing it to himself so doesn't need my help).

I'm going canyoneering for my holidays (as guys in North America say. We just say 'canyonning' or 'gully scrambling') so I'm becoming snake wise again ... if that's possible.

There are some great canyon snakes over here and they will all kill you ... Browns, Blacks, Tigers, Copperheads, Death Adders and Broadheads, all found in the Sydney Basin and the greater Blue Mountains ... which is nice.

I don't like snakes. They are one type of road kill I won't get out of the car to even check on ... if one of the 6 types of nasty snakes above is not dead, make sure your car can do more than 14 kilometres an hour, if you were the driver who ran over it. The bush tracks around here don't often allow 14 kph. So wind all of the windows up and close all the vents in the car ... and this still might not help because there 'ain't nothing darker than a cut snake.

Australia has 100 types of venomous snakes by the way (with 11 of the planet's top 20 most dangerous) but no deadly lizards, sadly.

When you hit a Roo they can be very tricky. A Roo can play dead, even if it is not badly hurt and as you get back in the car after dragging a dead Roo off the road, they will get up and hop away on you.

The big Roos that come in through your car windscreen are often not nice as furry companions. Have you seen the claws on a cross Roo? ... when a Roo is dark at you, they have claws that are bigger than a large Goanna's.

Be very carefull with your road kill over here ... select only the deadest ones.

Warren.

[ 08-30-2005, 12:45 AM: Message edited by: Wild Wassa ]

[Lucky Luke]

That's good fun folks!

But how do write it so that it SOUNDS like those guys? There is quite a lot of them dingos around here, and to me they sound something like:

- Hoey mowaeyte, howaryerdowing moaweyte? Howayvent seeyn yer for qwayte a whoayle, mowaeyte!
- Sorry my dear, I was pretty busy recently. How are things with you?
- Owl fowayne, mowaeyte! Howaeyve a drowink!

Edited to add:I am not an English speaker, so, please forgive my spelling mistakes... redface.gif

[ 08-29-2005, 11:25 PM: Message edited by: Lucky Luke ]

[Wild Wassa]

LL, G'day Mate, 'airgun.

'Airgun replaces "howaryerdoing." and Aussies say go'n, not 'doing'.

I see no spelling mistakes, not one Skipper. There are no mistakes in Aussie poetry, it is all freestyle mostly ... anything goes.

I recently heard an Aussie accent that pronounced Darlinghurst ... Darlink-he-est. I thought, this must be the new 'strine, Senator Bronwyn Bishop is trying to avoid, as she attemps to have head scarfs banned in public schools here. Although she wouldn't be seen dead in Darlink-he-est. She isn't common like the rest of us, that's why. She is a high class biggot.

I do read a slight foreign accent though in your work. Perhaps pinching you nose closed between your forefinger and thumb when typing LL, will give you more of a real 'strine accent.

Again, I hope this helps. It helps me as I'm not an English speaker either ... just 'strine.

Warren.

[ 08-30-2005, 03:37 AM: Message edited by: Wild Wassa ]

[Wild Wassa]

George, I've translated your openning post into real 'strine. I hope you don't mind?

"I've decided I must add WD to my 'ignore' list;"

I'm giv'n Dingo the flick Diggers;

"his style of speech ... shall we say is a disruptive influence on my life?"

his lingo is raw prawning me' Cobbers.

"I'm becoming masteroftherunonsentence, in writing and in speech;"

I'm becoming Master of the ear bash. Talking 'strine is cool lingo just like the Dingo and my thumbnail's now dipped in tar Sportsmen;

"others have noticed a bit of agitation, some so bold as to suggest lunacy, in my walkabouts at work."

The knockers are coming the raw prawn now, I'm pissing the Drongos off(we don't say co-worker) they think I'm a Roo lose in ther top paddock, when I'm on the hoof

"All that is livable, and I like to think loveable; but SWMBO has been less impressed."

I've got a good pozzy because my sheila has spat the dummy on me. Fair suck of the sav.

"When I mentioned I thought the 'hoons needed to attend to their studies a bit more, the look she delivered suggested she thought I was tetched."

The sprogs are swatting like Chardonay Liberals but my sheila stil thinks that I've lost the plot.

"similarly not well received."

stone the crows they think I'm a wacker.

"The final straw was when I inadvertently called her 'Possumpoop', meant entirely as a term of endearment."

(I can't translate this without causing more grief)

"Thankfully ..."

She'll be right Cobbers, no worries ('no wuckens' also fits well).

"I've learned a bit about construction, insulation, waterproofing etc. ... from my constant attention to the WBF.""

I've 4 be 2'ed the lot thanks to you jokers.

"My doghouse (where I'm currently ensconced) is 4-season ready, has cabletv, and a cablemodem next to the hot-tub."

The dig's the bee's knees, fair dinkum posh.

"I've a laptop and feel I can weather this storm."

She'll be right Mates no wobblies here. I can Coo-ee anywhere.

"I'm signed up for 'rehabilitation ... and hope that, having added ol' Shane to my list, there is hope for recovery and a permanent cure.

I've put my monica in for a bit of rehab, when I come good they will chuck a U'ey, no worries. Oo-roo.

Warren.

[ 08-30-2005, 05:57 AM: Message edited by: Wild Wassa ]

[Lucky Luke]

Great "translation" WW!!! :D :D :D
...and I appreciate you not mocking my "slight" foreign accent ;) ...hope I remain understandable!

And you, Shane alias Wild Dingo, you've got to mail me your number, I wanna hear your real voice 1 of these days! :cool:

[ 08-30-2005, 06:50 AM: Message edited by: Lucky Luke ]

[Phillip Allen]

(I think I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body) smile.gif

[Wild Wassa]

Ian S, I'm from Kingsford. Do you know how far Kingsford is from St Peters? smile.gif

Never would I think that I'm a typical Aussie, I don't even have a mobile phone or a bank card, nor have I been to a gay mardis gras.

We moved here to the ACT, to get away from the typical Aussie yuppies (from the Eastern suburbs). The typical Aussie spends 4-6 weeks of their life each year, in traffic jams (and they have to work for a living). I haven't spent half an hour in the last 6 years in a traffic jam (and as for work), I had best leave that to typical Aussies to do.

The typical Aussie pretends to like the bush. Just like how A.B. Patterson and Henry Lawson both wrote, both pretending to like the bush. They both wrote bush myths and legends about larikins. I don't enjoy the myth, not at all.

I could be a typical Aussie larikin though. Dingo sounds like one. That's if the typical larikin is more than just a myth.

Coo-ee Cobra.

Warren.

[ 08-30-2005, 08:46 PM: Message edited by: Wild Wassa ]

[George Jung]

I lost sight of this thread until now; damn, WW, nice 'translation'; I was laughing so hard I had tears rolling down my face. Thanks for the treat. :D

[Wild Dingo]

Well bein as how Im from a very remote place out in the gascoyne and hadnt seen a city till I was in my late teens... and Ive lived the wild rover life more than the citified life... visited every city on the mainland Tassy dont count its only a phart on the bum of Victoria anyways and we know what those Victorians are like :rolleyes:

I am what is called a quintisential Aussie... larconic easy goin an talk with Chips Rafferty in me head... Steve Flamin Irwin is only puttin on a show of talkin proper Aussie Paul Hogan was closer but Chips was THE Aussie...

Im different cause Im a short ass cheeky as buggary and dont really give a flyin rats snot about academically yarnin...

As for Sudney... sorry Ian but a wee reality check is needed its a bloody hole a puss filled boil on the bum of Aussie... hate the place! People are cool for the most part but yeeeeeeech! tongue.gif

Luc me ol cobber be careful for what you wish for me ol sock!! :eek: :D