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Spin_Drift
08-05-2015, 09:05 PM
Men are much more complex and complicated than given credit for. I look at the different personalities here and it makes me wonder. —Why are men the way they are? What makes men unhappy or happy? Why all the competition between men? What does men think? Etc., etc..

Glen Longino
08-05-2015, 09:10 PM
Hehehe...how would we know?:)
Good luck, Spinner!

The Bigfella
08-05-2015, 09:12 PM
http://wanna-joke.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/guys-sex-tits-think.jpg

Keith Wilson
08-05-2015, 09:18 PM
Why all the competition between men? Ah, now that I can answer, from the 50,000 foot level. It's evolutionary biology. We're mammals. Female reproductive capacity is a scarce resource. Male reproductive capacity definitely is not. One man can theoretically monopolize a lot of women, and from the point of view of the tribe or species, men are a lot more expendable. Thus male-male competition. No, we mostly don't live that way anymore, but our wiring doesn't change because we've been civilized for a few hundred or thousand years, and we still have those tendencies. Some of us keep them under control better than others.

CWSmith
08-05-2015, 09:22 PM
What does men think?

No one can force me if I don't want to!

Peter Malcolm Jardine
08-05-2015, 09:38 PM
Speaking for myself, or perhaps some members of my generation, men are repressed. In my generation, we were expected to shut up, go to work, don't complain, don't cry, don't stay home with our children and raise them, and on and on. That repression still exists to some extent, and it is very unhealthy for men. It breeds an inner resentment that sometimes sticks around, and poisons a lot of ground. Thankfully, things are changing. To some degree, women became 'liberated' and men did not.

John B
08-05-2015, 09:38 PM
I'm a simple creature. Sometime I wonder why that is and what my reason for being on ..... oh look shiny, does the top come off...?

CWSmith
08-05-2015, 09:41 PM
I'm a simple creature. Sometime I wonder why that is and what my reason for being on ..... oh look shiny, does the top come off...?

Yes, but it's old school - you need an opener.

Canoez
08-05-2015, 09:43 PM
Geez, Spin - I always thought it was old age.

I'll let you know, however, as soon as SWMBO tells me what it is. |;)

skuthorp
08-05-2015, 09:44 PM
What makes men tick? Self delusion.

and what Keith Wilson said.

wizbang 13
08-05-2015, 09:47 PM
i look at all the women here and wonder.....
where all the women?

John B
08-05-2015, 09:48 PM
Yes, but it's old school - you need an opener.

That is one very good explanation out of several but yes , now you mention it I do have 'an' opener, because it isn't so much about the beer, its the journey. And ( oxford comma)part of that journey is having various suitable tools for the job.

I must confess to having several openers. I'm quite capable of opening a bottle with a winch handle , another bottle , a crescent etc etc but following the journey philosophy yadayada :My favourites are.... One dolphin , one bullet, one naked lady, one hand, a lama, and numerous lesser pressed steel devices.

One to suit every mood and most beers except the ones that twist open easy.( which of course aren't real beer and shouldn't be drunk.)

skuthorp
08-05-2015, 09:49 PM
They probably have better things to do than watch us old blokes bitching about each other wizbang……………….

John B
08-05-2015, 09:52 PM
look at all the women here and wonder.....
where all the women?


But they're everywhere else though ain't they. I look at them and think , oh look shiny , I wonder if....

Phillip Allen
08-05-2015, 09:53 PM
men AND women are hard wired to procreate... we've got to be able to club dinner for her and her offspring... so she looks for the man with the biggest club :)

John B
08-05-2015, 09:57 PM
Bacon , no one said bacon yet .

bacon.

skuthorp
08-05-2015, 09:59 PM
I never wanted kids and don't like bacon much……………...

Syed
08-05-2015, 10:03 PM
Women !

The Bigfella
08-05-2015, 10:05 PM
They (women) prefer Adolf to Godwin, don't they?

John B
08-05-2015, 10:07 PM
Women !

I like em!

John B
08-05-2015, 10:12 PM
I never wanted kids and don't like bacon much……………...

Its a metaphor ... you like nice food don't you ,Jeff?

Right , whadda we got so far .
Women
sex
drink
food
no pressure. ( Thanks Pete, right on the money)
shelter, we need a tent in here.

The Bigfella
08-05-2015, 10:12 PM
I like em!

Sure beats liking men. In my book anyhow.... but, whatever floats your boat is fine by me

CWSmith
08-05-2015, 10:14 PM
One dolphin , one bullet, one naked lady, one hand, a lama, and numerous lesser pressed steel devices.

You have much to teach me. I am your pupil.

John B
08-05-2015, 10:22 PM
You have much to teach me. I am your pupil.

Didn't I say I'm a simple kind a of guy, I already have 2 thanks, something I'm very grateful for.

But kind of you to offer ,Seadub.

Old Dryfoot
08-05-2015, 10:26 PM
Women, that's what makes men tick.

The Bigfella
08-05-2015, 10:30 PM
Women, that's what makes men tick.


Especially when the women tickle them

The Bigfella
08-05-2015, 10:41 PM
https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/8544030976/h257AC41A/

John B
08-05-2015, 11:45 PM
http://i227.photobucket.com/albums/dd48/Waione_photos/Antiques/20150806_162350.jpg (http://s227.photobucket.com/user/Waione_photos/media/Antiques/20150806_162350.jpg.html)

Man stuff. Tools for a job that must be done....and done with style.

The Bigfella
08-06-2015, 12:31 AM
http://i227.photobucket.com/albums/dd48/Waione_photos/Antiques/20150806_162350.jpg (http://s227.photobucket.com/user/Waione_photos/media/Antiques/20150806_162350.jpg.html)

Man stuff. Tools for a job that must be done....and done with style.

Yeah, I inherited the same naked lady opener. It's my go to opener

Glen Longino
08-06-2015, 12:50 AM
Yeah, I inherited the same naked lady opener. It's my go to opener

I use my teeth...er, I mean my tooth!:)

bobbys
08-06-2015, 01:29 AM
Is there going to be a test on this?

Glen Longino
08-06-2015, 01:50 AM
Is there going to be a test on this?

Don't worry about it.
If there is a test, it will be for MEN only! heheh lol

Phil Y
08-06-2015, 03:07 AM
I'm a simple creature. Sometime I wonder why that is and what my reason for being on ..... oh look shiny, does the top come off...?

Only if you drive a V8, do a big burnout and yell "Show us yer tits"

bobbys
08-06-2015, 06:02 AM
Don't worry about it.
If there is a test, it will be for MEN only! heheh lol.

Toc.

elf
08-06-2015, 07:15 AM
i look at all the women here and wonder.....
where [are] all the women?
largely watching the men here from a relatively safe distance and seeing exactly what Keith said.

As for the question, the answer is simple.

Testosterone.

Paul Pless
08-06-2015, 07:17 AM
men AND women are hard wired to procreate... we've got to be able to club dinner for her and her offspring... so she looks for the man with the biggest club :)gun fetish explained away by evolutionary biology

The Bigfella
08-06-2015, 07:20 AM
gun fetish explained away by evolutionary biology

I've given up reading pre-civilization posts

elf
08-06-2015, 07:28 AM
https://scontent-iad3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/s720x720/11800515_10153567083234917_2051937855536159196_n.j pg?oh=5865faac214ba59b2a4725a025bec5a7&oe=565060F7

Hwyl
08-06-2015, 07:54 AM
As for the question, the answer is simple.

Testosterone.


You have a Ferrari Emily?

TomZ
08-06-2015, 07:59 AM
The real question is - if women really knew what makes men tick, would they still be attracted?

I've always wondered what a woman sees in a man -
a. we're certainly not beautiful or gracefull
b. we aren't trained when they get one, it's often years of work to get one so he'll stick to 'the honeydolist'.
c. we pee everywhere
etc

I've come to believe that women are born with a stint in their brain, that enables them to retain two conflicting thoughts. While that feature often drives men nuts, it's the only way a to explain how a woman can look at a man and think 'Ahhh! thats what I want.'
:)

TomF
08-06-2015, 08:02 AM
...Through it all, though, I never, not for one day. lost my ability to act like an a**hole.

Go figure.Testosterone shapes one's delivery, but it sure ain't a requirement.

S.V. Airlie
08-06-2015, 08:37 AM
After reading 90% of these posts Spin, I have come to the conclusion that MEN HERE don't know what makes us tick!:)

Radar O'Reilly
08-06-2015, 08:37 AM
Aw gee, you guys....

John of Phoenix
08-06-2015, 08:42 AM
You are a man.

A space alien delivers into your hands a device that will solve world hunger and ensure interplanetary peace. What do you do with it?

A. Deliver it to the Pope.
B. Deliver it to the UN.
C. Take it apart to see how it works.

CWSmith
08-06-2015, 08:45 AM
As for the question, the answer is simple.

Testosterone.

In other words, it's not our fault?

PhaseLockedLoop
08-06-2015, 08:46 AM
Ah, now that I can answer, from the 50,000 foot level. It's evolutionary biology. We're mammals. Female reproductive capacity is a scarce resource. Male reproductive capacity definitely is not. One man can theoretically monopolize a lot of women, and from the point of view of the tribe or species, men are a lot more expendable. Thus male-male competition. No, we mostly don't live that way anymore, but our wiring doesn't change because we've been civilized for a few hundred or thousand years, and we still have those tendencies. Some of us keep them under control better than others.

So now competition is bad? I thought that's what made America great.

CWSmith
08-06-2015, 08:46 AM
While undergoing treatment for cancer I received shots in the derriere that shut down my pituitary gland for three months at a time. The object was to reduce my testosterone level to zero, which suppressed the cancer. It worked.

At the risk of making a bad joke, I hope it's all "behind" you.

Seriously, I hope the cancer is gone and you are well.

TomF
08-06-2015, 08:48 AM
In other words, it's not our fault?Oh, I doubt that's a sound conclusion. :D

Gerarddm
08-06-2015, 08:50 AM
The inverse is one of the funnier jokes someone once told me: Sigmund Freud once mused " I have engaged in psychotherapy for fourty years, and I still am no closer to discovering the answer to the central question of our time, what is it that women want? "

David G
08-06-2015, 08:54 AM
An interesting little article. Superficial... but with some truth. For a more complete explication of a similar theme I recommend the book "The Hazards of Being Male: surviving the myth of male priveledge", by Goldberg --

http://www.alternet.org/story/147626/5_stupid%2C_unfair_and_sexist_things_expected_of_m en?sc=fb

bobbys
08-06-2015, 08:58 AM
https://scontent-iad3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/s720x720/11800515_10153567083234917_2051937855536159196_n.j pg?oh=5865faac214ba59b2a4725a025bec5a7&oe=565060F7
.

A 20oz true temper "rocket" steel shanked long handle smooth face is the only one that does the trick.

LeeG
08-06-2015, 10:04 AM
Heating up, cooling down, gas

Keith Wilson
08-06-2015, 11:44 AM
So now competition is bad? I thought that's what made America great.I didn't say it was good or bad. I was answering Spindrift's question. 'Why all the competition between men?". It has advantages and disadvantages. Human beings are both cooperative and competitive in varying proportion. On average, men are a bit more overtly competitive than women. The real talent of our species is, however, for cooperation on a grand scale; it's the main reason we've overrun the planet, and may manage to leave and go elsewhere.

CWSmith
08-06-2015, 12:21 PM
Oh, I doubt that's a sound conclusion. :D

I saw an opening. I had to try.

Curtism
08-06-2015, 12:25 PM
This is the best thread since "Why do men wipe their hands on their trousers".

Good job stumping the boys, Spin. Y>

George Jung
08-06-2015, 01:01 PM
Ah, now that I can answer, from the 50,000 foot level. It's evolutionary biology. We're mammals. Female reproductive capacity is a scarce resource. Male reproductive capacity definitely is not. One man can theoretically monopolize a lot of women, and from the point of view of the tribe or species, men are a lot more expendable. Thus male-male competition. No, we mostly don't live that way anymore, but our wiring doesn't change because we've been civilized for a few hundred or thousand years, and we still have those tendencies. Some of us keep them under control better than others.


Could'a made a good 'opening line'.....

'Yer purty cute..... I'd like to monopolize ya...'


Tell us a story, Keith!

Ian McColgin
08-06-2015, 01:06 PM
http://intradayfun.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/Man-Woman-Control-Panel.jpg

bobbys
08-06-2015, 01:17 PM
my wife cannot understand when she asks what I'm thinking and I reply.. Nothing..

Seems woman's minds never stop and seem to focus on any comment made 40 years ago..

I always listen to my wife but I have a time limit, after a hour she had to call her friends or I shut down.

Curtism
08-06-2015, 01:36 PM
bobbys tics and tocs, but he only does it when Glen's around.

Figure that one out.

Rum_Pirate
08-06-2015, 01:47 PM
Version 1

Wife's Diary:

Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinner. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on it. Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much.
I asked him what was wrong; He said, 'Nothing..' I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said he wasn't upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it. On the way home, I told him that I
loved him. He smiled slightly, and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior. I don't know why he didn't say, 'I love you, too.'
When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there quietly, and watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent. Finally, with silence all around
us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to bed. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were somewhere else. He fell asleep; I cried. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.



Husband's Diary:

A two-foot putt...who the hell misses a two-foot putt ?



Version 2

Woman's diary v Man's diary*WOMAN’S DIARY *
28 July 2007 Saturday
Saw him in the evening and he was acting really strangely.
I’d been shopping in the afternoon with the girls
and was a bit late meeting him. I thought it might be that.
The bar was really crowded and loud,
so I suggested we go somewhere quieter to talk.
He was still very subdued and distracted
so I suggested we went somewhere nice to eat.
All through dinner he just didn’t seem himself
- he hardly laughed and didn’t seem to be
paying any attention to me or to what I was saying,
I just knew that something was wrong.
He dropped me back home and I wondered
if he was going to come in.
He hesitated but followed.
I asked him what was wrong,
but he just half shook his head and turned the television on.
After about ten minutes of silence I said that I was going upstairs to bed.
I put my arms around him and told him that I loved him deeply.
He just gave a sigh and a sad sort of smile.
He didn’t follow me up immediately but came up later and,
to my surprise, we made love
- but he still seemed distant and a bit cold.
I cried myself to sleep.
I think he’s planning to leave me.
Maybe he’s found someone else.
- – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – -
MAN’S DIARY
Saturday 28 July
United lost.
Gutted.
Got a shag though.

David G
08-06-2015, 01:50 PM
Even a dead clock is right twice a day. If the clock runs sporadically... that frequency is reduced. Seems to fit the facts.

Ted Hoppe
08-06-2015, 02:58 PM
Testosterone.

It does get you to the top. How long you last is about personal cunning, style and perception earned youth that other men have granted you.

there is a difference between being a man and a male.

John B
08-06-2015, 03:03 PM
The real question is - if women really knew what makes men tick, would they still be attracted?

I've always wondered what a woman sees in a man -
a. we're certainly not beautiful or gracefull
b. we aren't trained when they get one, it's often years of work to get one so he'll stick to 'the honeydolist'.
c. we pee everywhere
etc

I've come to believe that women are born with a stint in their brain, that enables them to retain two conflicting thoughts. While that feature often drives men nuts, it's the only way a to explain how a woman can look at a man and think 'Ahhh! thats what I want.'
:)

Same here, what do they see, I dunno why they would.
Still, Lets not over analyse it....mmmm cofffffeeee.....

John B
08-06-2015, 03:46 PM
Its a metaphor ... you like nice food don't you ,Jeff?

Right , whadda we got so far .
Women
sex
drink
food
no pressure. ( Thanks Pete, right on the money)
shelter, we need a tent in here.


Right , whadda we got so far .
Women , or whatever gender floats yer boat etc etc.
Sex
Drink
Food
No pressure. ( Thanks Pete, right on the money)
Shelter, we need a tent in here.
Don't over think things.
Friday is good.

John B
08-06-2015, 03:47 PM
PS. Jim is a Legend.

CWSmith
08-06-2015, 03:49 PM
What makes men tick? We are like a good pocket watch. We have a stem and it needs to be wound on a regular basis.

Will that much honesty get me kicked out?

John B
08-06-2015, 03:50 PM
Only if you drive a V8, do a big burnout and yell "Show us yer tits"
Just for the record , I've driven V8's all my life cept for recently , don't like burnouts because they wear out my tyres in a stupid way and are bad for the ecology, and I have never , ever yelled anything like that ever in my life.

Thought it though.

John B
08-06-2015, 03:53 PM
Friday . Friday makes men tick , monday , not so much ( refer to Petes post previous page for context)

McMike
08-06-2015, 04:08 PM
PMJ is right on.

As for me; I was never was able to relate to my fellow men in general. Things like personal responsibility, honor, humility, if they ever were a part of the male condition, they sure aren't now. I've got the man act down fairly well by now, but despite having dangly bits between my legs I have never been able to relate very well to other men. What is the exception and what is the rule? What seems to garner respect among other men is bullying, dishonesty, projected strength (not real strength), sociopathy, and psychopathy, none of these qualities appeal to me in terms of how I want to act as a man. But these qualities sure appeal to women, care to venture a theory as to why Spin?

George Jung
08-06-2015, 04:21 PM
Have to believe women see a really damaged guy... and think 'I can fix that!'

McMike
08-06-2015, 04:25 PM
Sad and sick, but true George. Women are a large part of why men are deficient as a whole in our culture. If they themselves would select better men then maybe we'd see some real change in our culture. Men follow their D's and will do what is required of them to use them.

Keith Wilson
08-06-2015, 04:25 PM
What seems to garner respect among other men is bullying, dishonesty, strength, sociopathy, and psychopathy,Dude, you've been hanging out with the wrong guys.


But they sure appeal to women . . . Eh? Not when they grow up, most of 'em anyway.

McMike
08-06-2015, 04:32 PM
Keith, then God, please tell me where this shangrala of honor is cause I'm not finding it. FWIW, I have a great girl who appreciates me and one very good guy friend with whom I never have to wonder what his motives are.

I recognize some good guys here and there but it's not common, in fact it's very rare.

Keith Wilson
08-06-2015, 04:37 PM
Maybe I'm just lucky. Maybe guys get calmer as they age?

John B
08-06-2015, 04:59 PM
I'm with Keith, I know of guys like that, I don't associate with them.

Chris Smith porter maine
08-06-2015, 06:27 PM
I don't really tick, I'm more of a rock and roll kinda guy.

Peter Malcolm Jardine
08-06-2015, 06:39 PM
PMJ is right on.

As for me; I was never was able to relate to my fellow men in general. Things like personal responsibility, honor, humility, if they ever were a part of the male condition, they sure aren't now. I've got the man act down fairly well by now, but despite having dangly bits between my legs I have never been able to relate very well to other men. What is the exception and what is the rule? What seems to garner respect among other men is bullying, dishonesty, projected strength (not real strength), sociopathy, and psychopathy, none of these qualities appeal to me in terms of how I want to act as a man. But these qualities sure appeal to women, care to venture a theory as to why Spin?


I think those 'qualities' have less traction than they used to, but some of them can be used effectively in an intellectual way. I've covered most of the bases of male behaviour..... good and bad. Now I tend to be more solitary in my outlook. I don't participate in the silly chest puffing exercises, I dončt need to prove anything, but age and experience has given me more tools to deal with other peoples behaviours when I have to. Mostly, I like to go home and be left alone. :D

Yep, always wondered why some of the most beautiful and pleasant women end up with total knobs for boyfriends or husbands. It seems that audacious behaviour attracts women in some way. Cant figure it.

John B
08-06-2015, 08:08 PM
Cars.

sometimes I look at cars and think .... oh shiny , I wonder if the top comes off.....

Vince Brennan
08-06-2015, 08:21 PM
John, comments like that lead the world to believe that we men can't concentrate on an... whaddya mean, the screw is stuck?

Vince Brennan
08-06-2015, 08:24 PM
Seriously, SERIOUSLY??? Go watch "I Love L.A (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MtDhtadoeUk)" by Randy (another musical) Newman. It has ALL the elements, except gin and beer.

John B
08-06-2015, 08:27 PM
John, comments like that lead the world to believe that we men can't concentrate on an... whaddya mean, the screw is stuck?

I know, I know , sometimes I feel that really one should consider ... mmm lunchtime.

Glen Longino
08-08-2015, 12:14 AM
Where did Spin go?
We gave her some pretty good input, then she ran out on us.
Come back, Spin, and tell us what's on your mind.
We need to hear it!
And while you're at it, tell us what makes women tick.
We need to hear it:)

Reynard38
08-08-2015, 12:10 PM
Women, that's what makes men tick.

My clock stopped in my late 40's. My wife was no longer interested in winding me up. ;)

Spin_Drift
08-11-2015, 01:55 PM
This pretty much sums up the difference LOL.

Roger and Elaine: A Love Story
Dave Barry



Let's say a guy named Roger is attracted to a woman named Elaine. He asks her out to a movie; she accepts; they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else.And then, one evening when they're driving home, a thought occurs to Elaine, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud: ''Do you realize that, as of tonight, we've been seeing each other for exactly six months?'' And then there is silence in the car. To Elaine, it seems like a very loud silence. She thinks to herself: Geez, I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he's been feeling confined by our relationship; maybe he thinks I'm trying to push him into some kind of obligation that he doesn't want, or isn't sure of.
And Roger is thinking: Gosh. Six months.
And Elaine is thinking: But, hey, I'm not so sure I want this kind of relationship, some kind of obligation that he doesn't want, or isn't sure of either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I'd have time to think about whether I really want us to keep going the way we are, moving steadily toward . . . I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person?
And Roger is thinking: . . . so that means it was . . . let's see ....February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer's, which means . . . lemme check the odometer . . .Whoa! I am way overdue for an oil change here.
And Elaine is thinking: He's upset. I can see it on his face. Maybe I'm reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment; maybe he has sensed -- even before I sensed it -- that I was feeling some reservations. Yes, I bet that's it. That's why he's so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. He's afraid of being rejected.
And Roger is thinking: And I'm gonna have them look at the transmission again. I don't care what those morons say, it's still not shifting right. And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What cold weather? It's 87 degrees out, and this thing is shifting like a goddamn garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves $600.
And Elaine is thinking: He's angry. And I don't blame him. I'd be angry, too. God, I feel so guilty, putting him through this, but I can't help the way I feel. I'm just not sure.
And Roger is thinking: They'll probably say it's only a 90- day warranty. That's exactly what they're gonna say, the scumballs.
And Elaine is thinking: maybe I'm just too idealistic, waiting for a knight to come riding up on his white horse, when I'm sitting right next to a perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a person I truly do care about, a person who seems to truly care about me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centered, schoolgirl romantic fantasy.
And Roger is thinking: Warranty? They want a warranty? I'll give them a goddamn warranty. I'll take their warranty and stick it right up their ....
''Roger,'' Elaine says aloud.
''What?'' says Roger, startled.
''Please don't torture yourself like this,'' she says, her eyes beginning to brim with tears. ''Maybe I should never have . . Oh God, I feel so . .... ''
(She breaks down, sobbing.)
''What?'' says Roger.
''I'm such a fool,'' Elaine sobs. ''I mean, I know there's no knight. I really know that. It's silly. There's no knight, and there's no horse.''
''There's no horse?'' says Roger.
''You think I'm a fool, don't you?'' Elaine says.
''No!'' says Roger, glad to finally know the correct answer.
''It's just that . . . It's that I . . . I need some time,'' Elaine says.
(There is a 15-second pause while Roger, thinking as fast as he can, tries to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he thinks might work.)
''Yes,'' he says.
(Elaine, deeply moved, touches his hand.)
''Oh, Roger, do you really feel that way?'' she says.
''What way?'' says Roger.
''That way about time,'' says Elaine.
''Oh,'' says Roger. ''Yes.''
(Elaine turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him to become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she speaks.)
''Thank you, Roger,'' she says.
''Thank you,'' says Roger.
Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted, tortured soul, and weeps until dawn, whereas when Roger gets back to his place, he opens a bag of Doritos, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply involved in a rerun of a tennis match between two Czechoslovakians he never heard of. A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever understand what, and so he figures it's better if he doesn't think about it. (This is also Roger's policy regarding world hunger.)
The next day Elaine will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of them, and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyze everything she said and everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every word, expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering every possible ramification. They will continue to discuss this subject, off and on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any definite conclusions, but never getting bored with it, either.
Meanwhile, Roger, while playing racquetball one day with a mutual friend of his and Elaine's, will pause just before serving, frown, and say:
''Norm, did Elaine ever own a horse?''

paulf
08-11-2015, 02:04 PM
Actually Men are human beings and affected by very much the same things Women are, they just aren't as articulate expressing it.

TomF
08-11-2015, 02:05 PM
(Damn, Paul. Why'd you let that out of the bag?)

Ahem, [cough]. Brilliant, Spinner. Spot on. :D

John B
08-11-2015, 04:44 PM
Actually Men are human beings and affected by very much the same things Women are, they just aren't as articulate expressing it.

This is true. That is why we communicate as through we are speaking through glass.

speaking of which .... I have more bottle openers somewhere...

I ectually took this photo as an electrical gloat above decks , but somehow the openers got in there too.


http://i227.photobucket.com/albums/dd48/Waione_photos/Mobile%20Uploads/2015-08/20150808_110953.jpg

Peerie Maa
08-11-2015, 04:49 PM
Spinner, you still got that copy of Men are from Mars? ;)

John Smith
08-11-2015, 04:54 PM
I actually haven't 'ticked' since I got a digital watch.

Chip-skiff
08-11-2015, 05:23 PM
Never ticked in my life.

Snapping, snarling, growling, and howling— never have to guess what I feel.

http://i.livescience.com/images/i/000/056/097/i02/wolf-howl.jpg?1377186019

CWSmith
08-11-2015, 05:30 PM
...never have to guess what I feel.

Actually, isn't this the fundamental truth of men? My wife always knows what I'm thinking and what mood I'm in. She remains a mystery to me.

Chip-skiff
08-11-2015, 05:31 PM
Actually, isn't this the fundamental truth of men? My wife always knows what I'm thinking and what mood I'm in. She remains a mystery to me.

When we wolves are in doubt, we give it the sniff test.

The bum never lies.

CWSmith
08-11-2015, 05:38 PM
When we wolves are in doubt, we give it the sniff test.

The bum never lies.

:) You must be a lot of fun at dinner parties. "Pick a number between 1 and 10..."

Spin_Drift
08-12-2015, 10:33 AM
Well Gentlemen, let's take look at what is said about the differences between men and women. I'll give this to you in sections, and YOU can tell us if you find this true...


Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, an enormously popular book by author John Gray, contains many suggestions for improving relationships between men and women through understanding the communication style and emotional needs of the opposite sex. As suggested by the title, the book asserts the notion that men and women are as different as beings from other planets, and that learning the code of conduct of the opposite sex is of essential value even if individuals do not necessarily conform to the stereotypical behaviou.
Chapters

Chapter 1: Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus
It is important to remember that men and women have reciprocally different natures. Men and women need to appreciate these differences, and cease expecting each other to act and feel the way they do.


Chapter 2: Mr Fix-It and the Home Improvement Committee

Men love to have their abilities recognised and appreciated, and hate to have them scorned or ignored; women love to have their feelings recognised and appreciated, and hate to have them scorned or ignored. Men don't rate feelings highly as in their view they can result in hotly impassioned, wildly unstable behaviour; women don't rate abilities highly as in their view they can result in coldly dispassionate, aggressively competitive behaviour.


Men like to work on their own, and exercise their abilities by solving problems quickly and singlehandedly; women like to co-operate, and exercise their feelings through interactive communication with one another. Men value solutions, and view unsolicited assistance as undermining their effort to solve problems alone; women value assistance, and view unsolicited solutions as undermining their effort to proceed interactively. Men desire that their solutions will be appreciated; women desire that their assistance will be appreciated.

...

Spin_Drift
08-12-2015, 10:38 AM
Chapter 3: Men Go to Their Caves and Women Talk

When faced with tough problems, men become non-communicative so they can work out how best to help themselves, while women become communicative so that others can work out how best to help them. Men like to demonstrate their abilities by being allowed to solve problems without interference; women like to demonstrate their feelings by being allowed to relate problems without interference.

When men do communicate, they like to get to the point, and generally only want to listen if they feel the conversation has a point; women enjoy talking for its own sake, and are happy to listen unconditionally.

Keith Wilson
08-12-2015, 11:14 AM
Beware binary thinking. Remember that most psychological characteristics on which men and women differ can be described by overlapping bell curves, sort of like this:

http://38.media.tumblr.com/9fda0a210bd8fd3c7e05d025b48d1744/tumblr_inline_n7m8sgn2rU1s0q1be.png

Canoeyawl
08-12-2015, 11:41 AM
Overlapping curves, yes that explains everything.

http://38.media.tumblr.com/9fda0a210bd8fd3c7e05d025b48d1744/tumblr_inline_n7m8sgn2rU1s0q1be.png[/QUOTE]

Keith Wilson
08-12-2015, 11:47 AM
No, but it explains some things.

TomF
08-12-2015, 11:58 AM
I like it when curves overlap.

CWSmith
08-12-2015, 12:14 PM
I like it when curves overlap.

:) I've enjoyed this thread more than any other in recent months. :)

Osborne Russell
08-12-2015, 12:24 PM
Chapter 3: Men Go to Their Caves and Women Talk

When faced with tough problems, men become non-communicative so they can work out how best to help themselves, while women become communicative so that others can work out how best to help them. Men like to demonstrate their abilities by being allowed to solve problems without interference; women like to demonstrate their feelings by being allowed to relate problems without interference.

When men do communicate, they like to get to the point, and generally only want to listen if they feel the conversation has a point; women enjoy talking for its own sake, and are happy to listen unconditionally.

Some men meet in caves to communicate, and when they come out, they alter the power structure directly. Women then talk about that.

Prior to the industrial revolution and to a large extent after, women have only been able to participate in the formation and use of real power vicariously, through the activities of whatever power structure they're dependent on -- family, clan, tribe, etc.

Because they are valued for their potential to breed, but effectively disabled by pregnancy and child-rearing, they are dependent to the extent of becoming property.

So there's a biological component to the difference in choice of topic of communication, but it doesn't necessarily mean that the choice is biologically determined, i.e. it doesn't mean that women don't want to talk about developing power regardless of cultural context. Maybe if they could, they would.

Let's take away the biological component and see.

Reds know instinctively that this is the deal, that reproductive freedom is potentially the end of patriarchy. Women as well as men are frightened of having to question fundamentally their view of themselves.

Canoeyawl
08-12-2015, 12:51 PM
No, but it explains some things.

Well, it explains what makes men tick...

Keith Wilson
08-12-2015, 01:03 PM
Well, it explains what makes men tick...Some men, to some degree. :D

TomF
08-12-2015, 02:34 PM
Well, it explains what makes men tick...Analog pacemaker? Swallowed an old watch?

Bobby of Tulsa
08-12-2015, 02:43 PM
Some Man's gotta say it.http://www.trademarkia.com/logo-images/cb-fleet-investment-corporation/hail-to-the-v-85215399.jpg

Steve McMahon
08-12-2015, 02:54 PM
http://i1171.photobucket.com/albums/r556/SteveMcMahon/11705319_1464601873835221_853910623389673229_n.png

skuthorp
08-12-2015, 04:28 PM
http://forum.woodenboat.com/images/misc/quote_icon.png Originally Posted by Spin_Drift http://forum.woodenboat.com/images/buttons/viewpost-right.png (http://forum.woodenboat.com/showthread.php?p=4621882#post4621882)


Chapter 3: Men Go to Their Caves and Women Talk

When faced with tough problems, men become non-communicative so they can work out how best to help themselves, while women become communicative so that others can work out how best to help them. Men like to demonstrate their abilities by being allowed to solve problems without interference; women like to demonstrate their feelings by being allowed to relate problems without interference.

When men do communicate, they like to get to the point, and generally only want to listen if they feel the conversation has a point; women enjoy talking for its own sake, and are happy to listen unconditionally.

Describes me pretty accurately Spin. Especially the last para. I have to make conscious decisions NOT to do that all the time. The dismissive term 'small talk' comes out of this attitude, but I am not good at it at all and become far to obviously bored.

Spin_Drift
08-12-2015, 06:55 PM
Glad to hear that ...CWSmith :)

Spin_Drift
08-12-2015, 06:56 PM
Interesting. Thank you for telling me. Skuthorp.

Spin_Drift
08-12-2015, 06:57 PM
Chapter 4: How to Motivate the Opposite Sex

A man's instinct is to look after himself, even if it means sacrificing others; a woman's instinct is to look after others, even if it means sacrificing herself. In a relationship, a man has to learn how to care for his partner rather than sacrificing her needs in favour of his own, and a woman has to learn how to be cared for by her partner rather than sacrificing her own needs in favour of his, so that the needs of both are met. If they do this successfully, both win, unlike their instinctive behaviours where one person gains from another’s loss. This has to be worked at, because if either partner feels their efforts towards the relationship are not being successful in pleasing their partner, they may feel hurt and decide to revert to their instinctive behaviour. Unfortunately this then causes the other partner to do the same, and the relationship unravels inexorably.


In a relationship, a man needs to feel that his attentions are needed, and a woman needs to feel that her needs are attended. To achieve this, a man has to express his desire to fulfil her needs and her worthiness to receive his care, and a woman has to express her desire for his care and his worthiness to fulfil her needs. Both must remember to appreciate, accept, and forgive the other, and avoid blaming them when they fail.

johnw
08-12-2015, 08:05 PM
Chapter 3: Men Go to Their Caves and Women Talk

When faced with tough problems, men become non-communicative so they can work out how best to help themselves, while women become communicative so that others can work out how best to help them. Men like to demonstrate their abilities by being allowed to solve problems without interference; women like to demonstrate their feelings by being allowed to relate problems without interference.

When men do communicate, they like to get to the point, and generally only want to listen if they feel the conversation has a point; women enjoy talking for its own sake, and are happy to listen unconditionally.

This actually sounds more like introverts and extroverts. There's always something behind the stereotypes, but the fact that our culture tells men not to talk too much about their feelings doesn't mean they don't have them, or don't value them. I don't buy the idea that men and women have "reciprocally different natures." I'm sure there are some things that are hard-wired, but two people having a similar nature -- extrovert/introvert, serious/frivolous, funny/dramatic -- has little to do with gender.

Barry brilliantly skewers the stereotypes, but remember, there are men obsessively torturing themselves over relationships, and women who aren't much bothered. We're not a different species.

Men are from earth, women are from earth, get used to it.

johnw
08-12-2015, 08:18 PM
Chapter 4: How to Motivate the Opposite Sex

A man's instinct is to look after himself, even if it means sacrificing others; a woman's instinct is to look after others, even if it means sacrificing herself. In a relationship, a man has to learn how to care for his partner rather than sacrificing her needs in favour of his own, and a woman has to learn how to be cared for by her partner rather than sacrificing her own needs in favour of his, so that the needs of both are met. If they do this successfully, both win, unlike their instinctive behaviours where one person gains from another’s loss. This has to be worked at, because if either partner feels their efforts towards the relationship are not being successful in pleasing their partner, they may feel hurt and decide to revert to their instinctive behaviour. Unfortunately this then causes the other partner to do the same, and the relationship unravels inexorably.


In a relationship, a man needs to feel that his attentions are needed, and a woman needs to feel that her needs are attended. To achieve this, a man has to express his desire to fulfil her needs and her worthiness to receive his care, and a woman has to express her desire for his care and his worthiness to fulfil her needs. Both must remember to appreciate, accept, and forgive the other, and avoid blaming them when they fail.

This is really horrible. It makes it sound like men are born sociopaths who must learn human interactions.

Consider the male notion of heroism, in which the man sacrifices himself for the greater good. That's a cultural imperative, but it reflects an urge to care for others even at the sacrifice of one's own life.

People do get locked into cultural roles as young adults, but I've noticed that people tend to become more like themselves as they get older. The older my father got, the more his kind and sentimental nature came to the fore, the more the hard carapace of youthful cynicism receded. My mother remains introverted and independent, more practical than sentimental.

I've not noticed any difference in how selfish people are based on gender, yet chapter 4 says that men are selfish and need to learn to care, while women are naturally nurturing. I look at the men in my extended family and my friends, and that's not what I see at all. It sounds more like what society was trying to get from women and allow men in the past than anything fundamental about human nature.

paulf
08-12-2015, 11:12 PM
Courage, strength of character, nurturing, honesty, kindness etc, etc. These are traits of both women and men. Our culture makes the practice of these look different in men and women. But they are there, and when tested, I think most women and men step right up to the plate.

Or at least, I hope we do.

Wooden Boat Fittings
08-13-2015, 01:33 AM
Okay Aulikki, what's Kalevala done to start all this? :)

Mike

Spin_Drift
08-13-2015, 02:58 AM
This is really horrible. It makes it sound like men are born sociopaths who must learn human interactions.

Consider the male notion of heroism, in which the man sacrifices himself for the greater good. That's a cultural imperative, but it reflects an urge to care for others even at the sacrifice of one's own life.

People do get locked into cultural roles as young adults, but I've noticed that people tend to become more like themselves as they get older. The older my father got, the more his kind and sentimental nature came to the fore, the more the hard carapace of youthful cynicism receded. My mother remains introverted and independent, more practical than sentimental.

I've not noticed any difference in how selfish people are based on gender, yet chapter 4 says that men are selfish and need to learn to care, while women are naturally nurturing. I look at the men in my extended family and my friends, and that's not what I see at all. It sounds more like what society was trying to get from women and allow men in the past than anything fundamental about human nature.



You're lucky to have a nice family.

I don't know where the author came up with his ideas. It appears his book has been widely read and liked by many. I haven't read his writing as I have my own way of seeing how people are. I don't classify men or women as a group, I see each one as an individual and thus different from others. I go by how I see someone, male or female treat others. Actions really do show what a person is made of, no matter what they say....

I have met some selfish men and women to whom they were the most important... No one else counted.

I've also met some wonderful, caring, loving people who were very positive. People are a strange mixed lot and you can decide what kind you want in your life.


I put the chapters of his book into this thread to get conversation going and to see what will come out of it.

Spin_Drift
08-13-2015, 03:02 AM
Okay Aulikki, what's Kalevala done to start all this? :)

Mike

Not a thing. He's a good man and I'm very happy with him.

Nothing personal here. Just a thread started to see what makes men tick. There are so many different kinds of people here at the WBF bilge. They act so differently from each other and I'm curious.

Paul Pless
08-13-2015, 12:24 PM
I think Katherine should read this book.

Spin_Drift
08-13-2015, 01:45 PM
This what he says.

Chapter 5: Speaking Different Languages

Men talk in very literal terms for the purpose of relaying information; women employ artistic licence and dramatic vocabulary to fully express and relate their feelings. Men like to sort their thoughts out before communicating them, and have the tendency to become distant and non-communicative as they ponder their concerns. At this time, a woman needs reassurance that her partner still rates her as worthy of being taken care of. Women like to sort their thoughts out in the process of communicating them, and have the tendency to pour forth a litany of general grievances as they relate their concerns. At this time, a man needs reassurance that his partner still rates him as worthy of taking care of things. Both must try to avoid feeling personally to blame when their partners are dealing with problems.
When a man is troubled, he does not want his partner to express concern for him, but loves to be told that the problem is easily within his abilities to rectify because of the implicit vote of confidence in his abilities. When a woman is troubled, she loves her partner to express concern for her, but does not want to be told that the problem is a simple one to solve because of the implicit dismissal of her concerns about the issue. A solution should be sought once her feelings have been fully listened to: too quick a solution justifies his abilities but devalues her concerns, too enduring a problem justifies her concerns but devalues his abilities.

Men feel validated and gratified when they are left to sort things out by themselves, and feel undermined by being offered sympathy or unsolicited assistance. Women feel validated and gratified by being offered sympathy or unsolicited assistance, and feel undermined when they are left to sort things out by themselves.

To accommodate their partners' responses, each should make small changes to their behaviours and communication towards the other, but without compromising their own true natures.

Peerie Maa
08-13-2015, 01:53 PM
Spinner, you still got that copy of Men are from Mars? ;)


Well Gentlemen, let's take look at what is said about the differences between men and women. I'll give this to you in sections, and YOU can tell us if you find this true...


Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, an enormously popular book by author John Gray, contains many suggestions for improving relationships between men and women through understanding the communication style and emotional needs of the opposite sex. As suggested by the title, the book asserts the notion that men and women are as different as beings from other planets, and that learning the code of conduct of the opposite sex is of essential value even if individuals do not necessarily conform to the stereotypical behaviou.
Chapters



...

I love it when I get something right. :D


Especially when interacting with a woman :D:D

skuthorp
08-13-2015, 03:47 PM
My goodness Spin, the author knows me better than I know myself! :D

Dave Hadfield
08-13-2015, 10:26 PM
Men have the Y chromosome. Women don't.

It's the Tool chromosome, the Hardware chromosome, the "He scores!" chromosome, and the Shoot-It chromosome.

It is not the Feelings chromosome -- that's on the X site. We have it, too, but it is subsumed.

Dave

Paul Pless
08-15-2015, 08:52 PM
Spin, a question if I may. . .

why is that when men have an argument its about one very single and isolated issue; yet when women start/have an arguemnet its about everything in the fooking world from this moment to all the fooking way back to the beginning of fooking time?????????????????

CWSmith
08-15-2015, 08:56 PM
Spin, a question if I may. . .

why is that when men have an argument its about one very single and isolated issue; yet when women start/have an arguemnet its about everything in the fooking world from this moment to all the fooking way back to the beginning of fooking time?????????????????

Just fix the bathroom...

paulf
08-15-2015, 09:33 PM
For what it's worth, men also, deeply fall in love, "this human being is the example of perfect". Then after 43 years we find out that this is "correct" and it's to late to be an a$$ Hole for fun.

Ride with the river and enjoy it.

I don't believe in religion, but who ever made this up, knew what was good for us.

Peerie Maa
08-16-2015, 05:35 AM
Spin, a question if I may. . .

why is that when men have an argument its about one very single and isolated issue; yet when women start/have an arguemnet its about everything in the fooking world from this moment to all the fooking way back to the beginning of fooking time?????????????????

Read the book for yourself.

Spin_Drift
08-16-2015, 03:42 PM
Spin, a question if I may. . .

why is that when men have an argument its about one very single and isolated issue; yet when women start/have an arguemnet its about everything in the fooking world from this moment to all the fooking way back to the beginning of fooking time?????????????????


Sheesh, Paul. It should never be that way. There are several keys to a happy merriage and happy relationships.

One of them is NEVER to go back and bring out things from the past that have already been ironed out .. That is really deadly for relationship…

Best would be no argument, rather there would be an adult conversation without a bunch of "human emotional reaction" .. When a couple has a disagreement they should look for what is best for both of them and for the relationship, when looking for solutions .. If in an argument one person "wins" they both lose... Creating a relationship is like money in the bank. The more you put into it the more you get out of it ..

I believe in creating the relationship freshly every day. I believe in letting my husband know (often) how wonderful he is and what a good man he is. There is so much goodness in him and I really appreciate it and I let him know often .. I do that in many ways. Yet he's a wild man and not all the way housebroken, LOL. And that's OK.

The other thing that's one of the most important things that I have found, is to allow the other person be who they are without trying to change them. That goes for all their little foibles and idiosyncrasies .. Every time a person criticizes the other person or tries to change the other, is an invalidation of who the other person is .. If a person wants to have a happy marriage, that's really important .. There are countless ways of doing something, or getting into the same destination, and they all OK .. Who is the say whose way is right...

Live and let live. Don't bring things up from the past when they already handled. If you made a mistake admit it. Don't keep repeating the same mistake over and over. Grant the other person their beingness and let them be who they are, without trying to change them.
Cultivate your spirit of play and lightness of heart. See how you can create your relationship to be fun...

This little bit of advice, or knowledge I have learned in life will make life better for person and their partner....

hokiefan
08-16-2015, 03:45 PM
Sheesh, Paul. It should never be that way. There are several keys to a happy merriage and happy relationships.

One of them is NEVER to go back and bring out things from the past that have already been ironed out .. That is really deadly for relationship…

Best would be no argument, rather there would be an adult conversation without a bunch of "human emotional reaction" .. When a couple has a disagreement they should look for what is best for both of them and for the relationship, when looking for solutions .. If in an argument one person "wins"they both lose... Creating a elationships is like money in the bank. The more you put into it the more you get out of it ..

I believe in creating the relationship freshly every day. I believe in letting my husband know (often) how wonderful he is and what a good man he is. There is so much goodness in him and I really appreciate it and I let him know often .. I do that in many ways. Yet he's a wild man and not all the way housebroken, LOL. And that's OK.

The other thing that's one of the most important things that I have found, is to allow the other person be who they are without trying to change them. That goes for all their little foibles and idiosyncrasies .. Every time a person criticizes the other one or tries to change the other one, is in invalidation of who they are .. If a person wants to happy marriage, that's really important .. There a countless ways of doing the same thing, or getting into the same destination, and they all OK .. Who is the say whose way is right...

Live and let live. Don't bring things up from the past when they already handled. If you made a mistake admit it. Don't keep repeating the same mistake over and over. Grant the other person their beingness and let them be who they are, without trying to change them.
Cultivate your spirit of play and lightness of heart. See how you can create your relationship to be fun...

This little bit of advice, or knowledge I have learned in life is not just for one person, it is for everyone as it will make life better for you and your partner....

You must realize that you are not normal. Now I'll shut up after I've gotten myself in trouble...

Cheers,

Bobby

Osborne Russell
08-16-2015, 05:34 PM
Periodic talks about feelings are called for . . . with oneself.


Burns defines emotional reasoning as assuming “that your negative emotions necessarily reflect the way things really are: ‘I feel it, therefore it must be true.’ ” Leahy, Holland, and McGinn define it as letting “your feelings guide your interpretation of reality.” . . . Therapy often involves talking yourself down from the idea that each of your emotional responses represents something true or important.

(emphasis added)

http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2015/09/the-coddling-of-the-american-mind/399356/

Spin_Drift
08-16-2015, 05:40 PM
So, this is what the next chapter is on that book...

Chapter 6: Men Are Like Rubber Bands

Men periodically bolt for cover when they suddenly fear that their self-sufficiency is becoming threatened. At these times they may become utterly unapproachable, demanding the right to be left on their own and to be allowed not to express their feelings, but if given support by being afforded space for a little while, they will soon feel better and spring back into their usual loving selves once again. It can be hard for women to handle the suddenness and speed with which men bolt for cover, and then subsequently spring back.

At times when men retreat into themselves, they can assist their partners not to be overly concerned or take it personally by providing some brief reassurance that they will return in due course. Women should resist the temptation to try to drag their partners back prematurely or criticise them over this natural behaviour.

Spin_Drift
08-16-2015, 06:52 PM
Chapter 7: Women Are Like Waves

(Like Hokeyfan said, I'm not normal.... I never get depressed. If I feel negatively about something, I look at it and see what makes me feel that way .. Then I look at what part of it I'm responsible for.. Then I handle it and go on with my life. We are responsible for our feelings and for our minds. We create them. We can make them anything we want, happy or sad. It's all within us. We can change it if we want to, but first we have to become responsible for our selves, our thoughts, our feelings, and the effects we create on others around us with our attitudes.

I look at life with great affinity. Life is good and the cup is always half full. Never half empty, even when going gets tough....

(Sheesh, am I getting too personal with this?)

///////////////////\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\.

Well, here is what the book says:


Women periodically sink into a depression when they feel it is time for emotional cleansing and resolution. At these times they may become utterly negative in their outlook, dwelling on every problem which troubles them, including long-standing ones which will generally have been raised and addressed before, and if they cannot find any real issues to concentrate on, then they will find some random other things to worry about.


They suspend their normal giving natures, demanding the right to express their feelings and not to be left on their own, and if supported and allowed enough time to express and release their negative feelings, they will begin to feel happier again and return to their usual loving selves. The slowness in which they sink into depression and subsequently recover may be hard for men to handle.

At times when women sink into themselves, they can assist their partners not to be overly concerned or take it personally by providing some brief reassurance that it is not their partners’ fault. Men should resist the temptation to try to lift their partners back up prematurely or criticise them over this natural behaviour.

Men demand the right to be free from time to time; women demand the right to be heard from time to time. When a man feels free he finds it easier to support a woman’s need to be heard; when a woman feels heard she finds it easier to support a man’s need to be free

If a man’s periodic need to be free coincides with a woman’s periodic need to be heard, the best solution is for the woman to make do with being heard by her friends instead.

Keith Wilson
08-16-2015, 07:01 PM
The problem with the descriptions in the book is not that they'e entirely wrong, but that they're entirely black and white. While statistically, men may on average (in this culture) be more like their description, it might be 52% of men 52% of the time. Likewise for women.

http://www.cakeworld.info/_/rsrc/1414257358328/transsexualism/are-women-and-men-different/Bell%20curve%20v1%20C.png