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Nicholas Carey
06-09-2012, 01:10 PM
Slates's legal writer, Dahlia Lithwick has devied a unified Muppet theory to explain humanity (and the dysfunctional Supreme Court). What kind of muppet are you?

From Slate, via Atlantic Monthly (http://www.theatlanticwire.com/entertainment/2012/06/muppet-theory-explains-humanity/53342/):

Chaos Theory: A Unified Theory of Muppet Types (http://www.slate.com/articles/life/low_concept/2012/06/what_kind_of_muppet_are_you_chaos_or_order_.html)

Every once in a while, an idea comes along that changes the way we all look at ourselves forever. Before Descartes, nobody knew they were thinking. They all believed they were just mulling. Until Karl Marx, everyone totally hated one another but nobody knew quite why. And before Freud, nobody understood that all of humanity could be classified into one of two simple types: people who don’t yet know they want to sleep with their mothers, and people who already know they want to sleep with their mothers. These dialectics can change and shape who we are so profoundly, it’s hard to imagine life before the paradigm at all.

The same thing is true of Muppet Theory, a little-known, poorly understood philosophy that holds that every living human can be classified according to one simple metric: Every one of us is either a Chaos Muppet or an Order Muppet.

Chaos Muppets are out-of-control, emotional, volatile. They tend toward the blue and fuzzy. They make their way through life in a swirling maelstrom of food crumbs, small flaming objects, and the letter C. Cookie Monster, Ernie, Grover, Gonzo, Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and—paradigmatically—Animal, are all Chaos Muppets. Zelda Fitzgerald was a Chaos Muppet. So, I must tell you, is Justice Stephen Breyer (http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/jurisprudence/2006/12/justice_grover_versus_justice_oscar.html).

Order Muppets—and I’m thinking about Bert, Scooter, Sam the Eagle, Kermit the Frog, and the blue guy who is perennially harassed by Grover at restaurants (the Order Muppet Everyman)—tend to be neurotic, highly regimented, averse to surprises and may sport monstrously large eyebrows. They sometimes resent the responsibility of the world weighing on their felt shoulders, but they secretly revel in the knowledge that they keep the show running (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9JeytBMLdc). Your first grade teacher was probably an Order Muppet. So is Chief Justice John Roberts. It’s not that any one type of Muppet is inherently better than the other. (Order Muppets do seem to attract the ladies (http://muppet.wikia.com/wiki/Miss_Piggy), but then Chaos Muppets collect the chicken harems.) It’s simply the case that the key to a happy marriage, a well-functioning family, and a productive place of work lies in carefully calibrating the ratio of Chaos Muppets to Order Muppets within any closed system. That, and always letting the Chaos Muppets do the driving (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MMR5JVo21wQ).

Think about your basic Muppet workplaces: Be it “Pigs in Space,” Oscar’s garbage can, or producing a hit Broadway show in 19 hours, it’s always crucial to get the ratio of Order-to-Chaos exactly right. One possible explanation for the blossoming dysfunctionality of the current Supreme Court is that the Order Muppets have all but taken over. With exception of Justices Breyer and Antonin Scalia, the Order Muppets are running the show completely. (The jury is still out on whether Elena Kagan may prove a Chaos Muppet.) Remember the old rule of thumb: Too many Order Muppets means no cookies for anyone.

Canoez
06-09-2012, 02:49 PM
Muppet? Me?

Nahhh...

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_AzbbH3Q-4cQ/TJeqNsCQGzI/AAAAAAAAAVM/SxQn5sjhaH0/s1600/beaker-muppet.jpg

Old Dryfoot
06-09-2012, 03:12 PM
Even a chaotic Muppet can learn lifes most important lessons.


http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5718287952076253583&hl=en

bobbys
06-09-2012, 05:13 PM
I ran off with Crystal Galye once but it never worked out between us.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kydJQWhYLGQ

johnw
06-09-2012, 07:40 PM
Well, there's your problem, until we get Donn who cannot spell Don here, we're short of order muppets.

Shang
06-09-2012, 07:54 PM
I once met Bert and Ernie on the back stairs of the building where I was working at Syracuse University. Both were having trouble with their large shoes, but I got to hug one or other of the team as they continued to the presentation they were giving on the upper place to which they were struggling.

skipper68
06-09-2012, 08:51 PM
LOL! I don't see me! http://i1135.photobucket.com/albums/m622/cvan6856/200px-SailorPiggy.jpg But I do see quite a few of you's grumpy old men!http://i1135.photobucket.com/albums/m622/cvan6856/grumpy.jpg:D ;)

seanz
06-09-2012, 08:54 PM
I once met Bert and Ernie on the back stairs of the building where I was working at Syracuse University. Both were having trouble with their large shoes, but I got to hug one or other of the team as they continued to the presentation they were giving on the upper place to which they were struggling.

See, drugs aren't all bad......
:)


Now, chaos or order, you be the judge.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&feature=endscreen&v=EyMCG0dWeQA

Rich Jones
06-09-2012, 09:01 PM
I'm definately a Kermit type.
So far, the votes are overwhelmingly for chaos. Of course, this is the Bilge. I wonder what the results would be if the entire WBF voted and not just the Bilge rats.

Keith Wilson
06-09-2012, 10:43 PM
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_BQtYCYJpONQ/TMDuErxVHkI/AAAAAAAAE48/Drh60fw7rWI/s1600/Muppet+Scientist.jpg :d

Garret
06-09-2012, 10:46 PM
Skipper nailed it.... :)

Flying Orca
06-10-2012, 09:40 AM
I commented on the chicken harem thing on FB and my ex-wife (currently enjoying a visit from Oystagirl) posted "Bawk!". "Anecdote" may not be the singular of "data", but I'm leanin' toward chaos.

Hwyl
06-10-2012, 10:04 AM
Fozzy has a better sense of humor than me, but I try. I am not sure if he/we are chaos or rational.

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-NxAPfyT11EA/Twq9mb9kDbI/AAAAAAAAEqg/pkb5Mj7pP-s/s1600/fozzybear.png