HELP!!! I need help constructing a really good lie

[Phillip Allen]

I just got some guinea chicks for my daughter...she says she doesn't want noisy chickens but the Cooper's hawks, coons and foxes keeping getting her chickens

now I've got to convince her they are a new kind of chicken or, failing that, that I didn't know they were guineas

[David G]

Phillip,

What I want to know is why you'd come HERE looking for lying lessons?

Oh... and aren't guinea fowl WAY quieter than chickens? At least the West coast versions are ;)

[Phillip Allen]

Phillip,

What I want to know is why you'd come HERE looking for lying lessons?'cause there's more political partisans here than anywhere else :)

[David G]

Philip,

Sometimes the lefties around here display a distressing myopia, and a stubborn clinging to the Party Line. Sometimes they are startlingly quick to defend any idea that emanates from their side of the aisle, and just as quick to dismiss or discount anything from the other side.

Of course the right is guilty of the same sorts of behaviors.

But when the topic turns to lying - I'm afraid lately most of the big-money prizes go to the conservatives. Your comment is just a lie <G> Of course... so was mine about quiet guinea fowl LOL

[Phillip Allen]

hey, I really did get some...I thought the story (lie) might make some pretty good entertainment...I'm certainly gonna lie to Sarah...just hide and watch :)

I am perfectly willing to be laughed at over this...come on and join in

[Phillip Allen]

off to supper...hope there some good ideas when I geet back

[botebum]

There's a way to quiet Guineas. They are noisiest when they go to roost at dusk. Carefully watch where the biggest group are roosting. Go get a 12ga with no choke. I'd recommend #6 or #7 shot. Shoot from a decent distance at the main roosting site. Even though you just shot a big hole through the main roosting site, most remaining birds will go there because it's the "best roost". Resume shooting at the "best roost" after the initial commotion has subsided. Repeat as necessary until the birds become totally silent. Several applications of this method are generally required.
I had a neighbor with some noisy Guineas and used this method to quiet them. It worked the charm and he quit complaining about feed bills. My only response to that was- "Why did you have Guineas?"
"To get rid of ticks."
"Why did you feed them?"
"They need to eat."
"What did you think they'd do with the ticks? Play tiddly-winks and the loser had to leave the field?"

Doug

[Phillip Allen]

alright...I can see you guys ain't gonna be any fun tonight...I'm hittin the sack

[WX]

We can help but you have to agree to gun control first.:D

[Dane Allen]

Buy a copy of "The Audacity of Hope", there is plenty of fib training in there.

[katey]

The feed store in Ellsworth labeled their turkey poults with a sign that said "baby ostriches" and sold a lot to the summer people...

[WX]

Tell her they're Cootamundra Bantams.:D

[Phillip Allen]

good morning...this is much better

[Joe Dupere]

Well, if you're lucky, they'll all be males, which are quieter than the females, and will only make whatever that hideous noise is when they sense danger. The females make that hideous noise almost all the time. I know this because I'm listening to the guineas outside even as I type. We have one male and two females. The females seem to try to outdo each other in the noise department. But they really do eat the ticks and other bugs, they keep the garden cleaned up pretty good. I just wish they ate rats.

Joe, FFPoP

[Phillip Allen]

Well, if you're lucky, they'll all be males, which are quieter than the females, and will only make whatever that hideous noise is when they sense danger. The females make that hideous noise almost all the time. I know this because I'm listening to the guineas outside even as I type. We have one male and two females. The females seem to try to outdo each other in the noise department. But they really do eat the ticks and other bugs, they keep the garden cleaned up pretty good. I just wish they ate rats.

Joe, FFPoP

well, for gotts sake, don't turn em loose in the bilge!

[varadero]

Well, if you're lucky, they'll all be males, which are quieter than the females, and will only make whatever that hideous noise is when they sense danger. The females make that hideous noise almost all the time. I know this because I'm listening to the guineas outside even as I type. We have one male and two females. The females seem to try to outdo each other in the noise department. But they really do eat the ticks and other bugs, they keep the garden cleaned up pretty good. I just wish they ate rats.

Joe, FFPoP
Well just like the human world. I have 8 at the moment with two males, and they eat rats and other small vermin, even the odd snake, When the boys kick off, I know another rat is about to bite the dust! I really could not think of life with out the little buggers, they really make me laugh. Don´t lie just give them names.

[Mrleft8]

Tell her they're exotic Italian hybrid hens...... When they grow up, you look at them and say..... "I was TRICKED!!!!" :D

[Phillip Allen]

Tell her they're exotic Italian hybrid hens...... When they grow up, you look at them and say..... "I was TRICKED!!!!" :D

that's something like what I had in mind :)

[Phillip Allen]

I'm off the hook...my son took them

[Mrleft8]

I'm off the hook...my son took them

Chicken!

[Phillip Allen]

I knew somone would say that...I almost said "I'm off the chook"