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View Full Version : speaking of the differences between men and women...



Phillip Allen
12-13-2009, 11:18 AM
I decided to (finally) put up the globes on my back room celing fan...there are four of them which I've kept safe in a cabinet. The fan was taken down after the fire by the clean up crew which was mostly women. Guess what? Ya know the three lettle screws that hold the glass globes in place? the way they took the globes out, it seems, was to simply remove one of the screws holding each globe and pitch it...DAMN!

elf
12-13-2009, 11:23 AM
You haven't got a drawer of such things? I've got an entire cabinet of little plastic drawers full of every conceivable washer, cup hook, bolt, spring, type of screw, you name it.

Mrleft8
12-13-2009, 11:26 AM
You haven't got a drawer of such things? I've got an entire cabinet of little plastic drawers full of every conceivable washer, cup hook, bolt, spring, type of screw, you name it.

Yes..... But will you ever use the proper one for a given application? ;):D

(And no...... 1/4" mortise chisels are not screwdrivers... :rolleyes:)

Phillip Allen
12-13-2009, 11:41 AM
You haven't got a drawer of such things? I've got an entire cabinet of little plastic drawers full of every conceivable washer, cup hook, bolt, spring, type of screw, you name it.

that's the point...what seems pbvious to me (a man) is not so obvious to women (the cleaning crew)

"Of course we saved the screws...they're in the drawer with the napkin rings...the most obvious place we could think of!"

"Well, why in the world not just screw them back into the holes they came out of...that way I only have to climb the ladder once and I don't have to waste time looking for napkin rings which are stored...somewhere?"

Hwyl
12-13-2009, 11:48 AM
Real men don't have napkin rings, or napkins for that matter. What else are sleeves and drapery for.

capt jake
12-13-2009, 11:55 AM
Real men don't have napkin rings, or napkins for that matter. What else are sleeves and drapery for.
I used to deer hunt with a guy years ago. He would always come back at the end of the day, less one shirt sleeve. The next day, he would be missing the other sleeve. It didn't matter that there was TP in the truck, it was 'his' thing to do! :)

elf
12-13-2009, 12:02 PM
Yes..... But will you ever use the proper one for a given application? ;):D

You better be smiling, man.

Oh no, not I. What's wrong with using a sheet metal screw to hang a bookshelf, now...

Phillip Allen
12-13-2009, 12:04 PM
see what we mean ladies? (or girls or women or woe-man or whatever it is you feel you need to be called this week)

Phillip Allen
12-13-2009, 12:05 PM
You better be smiling, man.

Oh no, not I. What's wrong with using a sheet metal screw to hang a bookshelf, now...

He's prolly not smiling...he's got a good dead-pan delivery (or...if delivered to the wrong Carter, a dead MAN delivery)

Phillip Allen
12-13-2009, 12:20 PM
I wonder if women pilots have the same sort of mechanical...ah...questions?

paladin
12-13-2009, 01:53 PM
Maybe breaking up over 2500 not many engines I can think of go to 3500.....but then again, a few go to 14,000......and I've only met one woman pilot that couldn't troubleshoot her own engine....and she was applying for a job in Alaska.....I don't recall anyone ever hiring her, and she couldn't understand why.

Hwyl
12-13-2009, 01:58 PM
We had some car trouble last week. Tracey called me from the Stop n'Shop to tell me that the engine was running funny and there was antifreeze all under the hood.



You do realise she was just making you think you counted for something; apparently successfully.

Phillip Allen
12-13-2009, 02:21 PM
did you check the top hoses?

Paul Pless
12-13-2009, 03:17 PM
As it turned out, there was a little oil leak on the distributor shaft caused by a faulty O-ring. The oil dripped onto the heater hose and eventually caused a leak. I'd have never figured that out. Throw in a timing belt, hoses, water pump, cap and wires, tune up, oil and filter, valve adjustment and we spent more than most of the cars that I ever drove cost to buy.

Come time to pay the bill though, and all that rudimentary mechanical knowledge comes into play as I lock the billing-person with a frosty glare, finger on the bill "How much are you charging me for these four spark plugs, eh? You're joking, right?" Apparently not, so I forked over the sandwich-thick wad and off we drove.a whole new meaning for 'cash for clunkers':eek:

But there's more...can't wait to hear this

Paul Pless
12-13-2009, 03:37 PM
"Fook this, laddie, tomorrow's another day, lets go have a drink"...you have no idear how many times i've said that to myself this very day; just haven't acted on it yet... but i just made a small pot of strong coffee so i feel a bastardized irish whiskey coffee with a little baileys is coming up very soon.

Paul Pless
12-13-2009, 04:35 PM
4:30???

good god man. . . i thought i was an early riser:eek::eek:

Paul Pless
12-13-2009, 04:56 PM
I'm not a 'morning person'. My employees used to call me downright unpleasant before 9:00 a.m. WTF?

One of the best things I ever did to improve my 'character' was to force myself to get up early, usually between 5:00 and 5:20. Then I had almost two hours of quiet to myself to enjoy my coffee and the forum and the news before my staff showed up 7:00.

Now that I'm up here in Michigan I still get up early, stoke the fireplace, pack Katherine's lunch and make her breakfast and warm her car up for her before she heads to work a little after 7:00. When I go back to work in Alabama the first week each month, I think that's what Katherine misses most about me.:eek:

Paul Pless
12-13-2009, 05:37 PM
Tracey's kicking herself that she didn't shop around some more after reading that.of course after i see her safely down the driveway, i go catch a nap:D

Katherine
12-13-2009, 06:05 PM
Paul walked outside earlier to find that my Cube had a flat rear tire. Looks like a double ended screwdriver bit got stuck in the treads. I offered to call AAA to get the spare put on, then I'd have the vehicle fixed at work tomorrow. Paul's decided that I should take the pick-up to work tomorrow so that he can swap out the bad tire with the spare. I told Paul I'd leave him with the AAA card.:p

On a funny side note, Paul was getting the Cube's owner's manual out of the glove box. He holds up a small box, looks totally offended, and demands to know why I have a box of condoms in the car.
"Uh, honey, those aren't condoms, they're tampons." I nearly fell over laughing.:D

As for the drawer of misc fasteners, I've got a couple and you should see my collection of spare bits that I have at work. Engineers are pack rats.:o

Paul Pless
12-13-2009, 06:10 PM
"Uh, honey, those aren't condoms, they're tampons." I nearly fell over laughing.:D
it was dark, all i saw was the brand, "lifestyles"...

McMike
12-13-2009, 06:14 PM
:D:D:DDude, there is a big difference between condoms and tampons.

Paul Pless
12-13-2009, 06:16 PM
no ****

McMike
12-13-2009, 06:17 PM
lol

McMike
12-13-2009, 06:19 PM
:DYou can't make this stuff up, this is better than TV!!!

Phillip Allen
12-13-2009, 06:34 PM
Oh my...no, you can't make this stuff up!
Har, har, har...

katey
12-13-2009, 06:50 PM
The difference between men and women is that, while most* men will merely look longingly at the refrigerator and wish that there was a chocolate pudding in it, most women will get up and go make one.

Later, guys.

*I'm exempting Dan from this slander because he makes a fine chocolate pudding.

Phillip Allen
12-13-2009, 07:04 PM
on my way to Braums...

Katherine
12-13-2009, 07:06 PM
I did bake cookies today.

Tracey
12-13-2009, 07:12 PM
Took the back way home, kept it under fifty, said, "didn't you notice anything strange about the truck?" and let it go at that...

ah, yes, so now the truth comes out :p

Jim has this theory - now what do you all think of this?- that I drive the vehicles "differently".

Amazingly, the cars always seem to break down on my watch :rolleyes:

Phillip Allen
12-13-2009, 07:16 PM
Hi Tracey............................................ ............................................see ya

Shang
12-13-2009, 07:25 PM
I wonder if women pilots have the same sort of mechanical...ah...questions?

I once took off in the flight school's Cessna 140. Leveling off at altitude I noticed three small lipstick dots on the windshield. I puzzled for a while, then, Eureka! I scooted down in the seat and confirmed that those three red spots lined up with the horizon in the prairie country.
The woman pilot who had flown the plane the day before had independently invented a visual reference system to confirm that she was flying straight and level.

pefjr
12-13-2009, 07:48 PM
I wonder if women pilots have the same sort of mechanical...ah...questions?Confucious says, " Woman who fly airplane upside down have crack-up".

Wild Dingo
12-13-2009, 10:14 PM
Was once a time... I could fix just about anything on a car or deisel motor... was a time... no longer... see I reckon the sneaky basturds that are genetically modified androids we like to call mechanics got together and made up a whole cockanbull story about how bad the old cars were to drive how bad they were for the ozone layer an all this other crud and sold it to some namby pamby worried about their position of power in all governments and we the unwashed multitudes had to change over to these bloody horrendously complicated mongrel things we now have under the bonnets of our cars... this so the genetically modified androids can make MORE bloody money than Solomon because we were all doing our own mechanical repairs back then

I looked under the bonnet the other day of the Landcruiser after about 30 minutes of stretching poking feelin an generally scratching my noggin I finally found the dipstick!!! that was great thinks I and start the process all over again looking for the auto dipstick which by rights an my reconing should be just behind the other dipstick so about 15 minutes later EUREKA its found and checked... the radiator is easily found its at the front! :D as for the rest? Ive no bloody idea!! The motor is almost entirely encased :mad:

So my view is... I may as well help prop up the genetically modified androids take over of the world at least then I wont be shafted too hard cause Ive funded at least 1000000 of the basturds!!! :mad:

As for junk in drawers from the shop... I had a gander in the shed the other day looked around turned around and shut the door!!! :rolleyes: no way in hades ANYONE can find anything in there!! Mind you I have a drawer of bits an bobs that I probably wont ever use again in the kitchen... screws and such I only needed one or two of but had to buy 100 of the things hinges for a one off job that meant I had to buy 2 dozen instead of the 4 I needed cause thats how they bloody well package the things!! I NEEDED 4 YOU IDIOTS NOT 20 BLOODY 4!!! I reckon the packers are all sheilas personally... ONLY a sheila would think to put 24 hinges in a pack for a single door!!! aaaaahhhh :mad: drives me knuts!!

anyhooo... to the beach for me!! suns shinin bright an hot so its time to get wet check yer all later in the day/night :cool: