View Full Version : New speks arrived today... mmmm

Wild Dingo
09-30-2009, 12:06 AM
So there I am tryin to read the message on the tiny text thing on my mobile squinting reaching my arm further than its meant to go gave up grabbed the nearest sheila and said "Sweets? Im blind as a bat and have forgotten my glasses could you read this for me?" she takes the phone with a grin and read "Mr Dingo your glasses are ready please come and pick them up" and laughed her head off... bloody young tourists no respeck!!! :rolleyes:

So I hotfooted it in my wombling way over the other side of town to the eye specialists office and wandered in "Gidday sweets, Im here to pick up my new speks" I says to the nearest sheila... she looks me up and down and nods goes over and picks up a little wee baggie thingy and motions me over to a cubicle we sit and she gets the glasses out "Hey hang on a tic love how do you know theyre MY glasses you havent asked my name yet!" she smiled and winked as she handed the new flash speks over "Mr Dingo sir your hair is a dead give away we all noticed your long maniac curly hair when you came in last week" oooh right so its not me stunning good looks me drop dead spekky eyes... its me flamin mongrel unruley mop!! shheeeeesh!

Anyway to get to the crux of the post... I tries these things on and WAOW POCKAHUNTITS!!!... theres three distinct levels of blur!!! :eek:

the sheilas grinning still and hands me a bit of paper with some writing on it "hahhahaha you should hahaha be able to ooohahahaha read the bottom hahahha line now hahahahaha" I frown over the top of them and say "Whats so funny eh? you reckon its a giggle me bein all blurry eyed when Im sober huh??" she laughed even harder "oohhh Mr Dingo the look on your face was priceless hahahaha" mmmmmm what look? the look of old Mr McGoo? the bleery look of a spotlight caught roo? WHAT LOOK??? I COULDNT SEE A BLOODY THING!!!

"Ooooh please Mr Dingo stop!!! hahahahha it will... hahaha gasp hahaha take about two weeks for you hahahaha eyes to ooohhh god please!! adjust to the glasses" I glare at her again... pretty wee thing not a waitress type of course but still kinda cute at any other time or place young lady... "mmm" I say as I start moving my head up and down in time with my thoughts "HEY!!! OKAY I CAN SEE THAT!!! COOL!!" and with that BOTH sheilas burst out laughing! :rolleyes:

"okay thats it! I want another pair of glasses buggar this!!" The stopped as though someone had shot of a potato cannon in the store... "But Mr Dingo they look great on you" says the one at the back of the store "hahahhahahaha oooohhhhhhggoooooooddddgod!!!" the other was by this time on the floor curled up under the table... I was I tell yer gettin right phissed of by now! :mad: The other sheila musta seen murder and mayhem in me eyes and raced around her desk and over toward me "No! Please please just look in the mirror at your expression Mr Dingo thats all it is nothing personal your expression!"... mmm so I looked... and staring right back at me was the google eyed blurry visioned wild man from outta outback black stump!! mmmm

Now she kicked the other girl in the bum and shooed her out the back still crackin up something shocking and sat me back down calm as a cucumber she was... and right waitress type good lookin to!... So we got to smiling about it and she says "Look Mr Dingo cause youve always worn bifocals for a long LONG LONG time this is something new lets look it as progress okay? your okay with progress arent you?" I nod still leery of sayin or lookin at her in case she got a fit of the chuckling madness "right so its going to take awhile for your eyes to adjust okay if you have any problems you just come and see me okay... look I will give you my number and you can ring anytime alright hang on a tick" and off she trots to the front counter and comes back with a business card and pen and writes a number down leans over and hands it to me with a whisper "sssshhh if they caught me doing this it would be my job just ring me if you have any problems... anytime" a wink and in a louder voice "I do apologize for Jens manners Mr Dingo I will have a talk with her... have a great day" another whisper as I stand to leave "tonight?"

I left holding the business card with the business number AND her private numbers on it and a new whacketty dak pair of glasses! Pretty cool they are to all spekky and change into sunnys when I step outside the focus is now pretty easy to get just gotta move yer head around like a demented chook is all... so I dont guess I will be ringing her... :rolleyes:

At the office! ;)

Bob (oh, THAT Bob)
09-30-2009, 12:19 AM
I tried progressive lenses, hated them. Tripped over stairs, no clarity in peripheral vision. Changed to single focus lenses, one set of glasses for outside and mid-range (long distance focus, anything over about 6-8 feet), another set of glasses for reading and at the computer (short focus). Much, much happier.

09-30-2009, 02:49 AM
Some people adjust to glasses better than others. The optometrist always says they'll take a few weeks, usually for me its a few hours. If you can tell that the girl is maybe worth ringing, you are on the right track Dingo.

09-30-2009, 04:07 AM
I don't bother being chatted up anymore. I get my glasses by mail order from Zenni Optical. $50 for a pair of progresives with titanium frame. I suppose those old fellas in downunderland are happy to pay an extra $300 to be flirted with. I'd even flirt with Shane for 300

P.I. Stazzer-Newt
09-30-2009, 04:27 AM
I don't bother being chatted up anymore. I get my glasses by mail order from Zenni Optical. $50 for a pair of progresives with titanium frame. I suppose those old fellas in downunderland are happy to pay an extra $300 to be flirted with. I'd even flirt with Shane for 300

Snap - 'cept I'd want a lot more that 300 to flirt with Shane.

The killer was fly fishing - trying to attach a size 18 fly to a 7X tippet calls for a much stronger lens than getting it in focus after the cast - single vision meant I could choose what not to see.

Now the problem is wading - my local rivers are really a boulder transport system with added fish, so much of the wading is over rounded rocks between 10" and 18" in diameter - unlike the hard rocks of my youth, there are blurry soft-focus rocks.

Answers on a postcard (in 18pt. or bigger please).

Wild Dingo
09-30-2009, 05:58 AM
Of course its right about now AFTER Ive shelled out the $$$$ that Gareth in his usual quiet way pipes in with an option :rolleyes: :p

Anyway... I cant say as Im happy with them at all... damned periphial vision is shot to shat along with nodding my noggin all the time trying to focus its just driving me insane!! :mad: But I will give them a few days and see how I go if theyre still no good they can give me a pair of bifocals!! :cool: I havent tripped (as yet!!) but I have come close as buggary to wiping out a couple of scooter riders a few cars an the occasional semi!!! :eek: bloody vision is worse than without the things

nod nod nod like one of those Elvis dolls I nearly bought for the worlds biggest Elvis fan Mikey... nod nod nod screeeeeeeeecch!! head out the window "F*(&*^%^*(%" with suitable New York road rage transplanted to sleepy Broome :D

09-30-2009, 06:34 AM
When I was really poor I couldn't afford the graduated lenses. Boy did I hate that pair of glasses. No, thanks. No line for me!

The cure for peripheral vision is to get frames which allow for plenty of glass around the perimeters of the range of view. Nice, big eyes, thanks.